I’ve discovered new tech of waking up early to get and early start on the farm. I can’t believe no one else has done this

One of the realest things about growing up is realizing everyone around you dont magically have it all together better than you

It’s too hot to work but the real problem is I’m too gay

if you give a fish a man

I love my faggot wife 💚🐶💚

Fuck up chart instead of a chore chart

I know why trans women love baseball. The commentators keep saying not to chase

plushy BAR too good for this world

when ur entering the tenderqueer competition and ur opponent opens with “as an afab nonbinary neurospicy queerdo”

I didn’t go to trade school, but can I learn on the job with you 😘

A cross posting app but is for sending the same meme to multiple partners

Sports Commentary xkcd.com/3262/

Otter fragrance chart #otter

Does anyone else get horny while folding their underwear?

the actual purpose to life:

anyways anybody know how to get into findom ?

Mets game postponed but I can’t fold clothes while playing super mega baseball

Enough with “who’s a good boy?” I want ask more philosophical questions like, “why a good boy?”

Britain about to get its seventh Prime Minister in ten years. I can’t say I’m surprised. As a people they’re often wonderful of course—very musical, for example, many charming customs, and always joking around in their quirky way—but they just don’t have the temperament for stable self-government.

they call me southeastern temperate confierous forest the way i be pining

Me and my wife

He might be the worst best to ever do it

not now furry incest son. daddy's losing the house

‘Father’ and ‘dad’ are synonyms. ‘Figure’ and ‘bod’ are synonyms. But, a ‘father figure’ and a ‘dad bod’ aren’t exactly the same thing…

I’m no dad!!!

I think I’d make a good dad to someone who has already grown up

I could be bean dad

sent this image to my dad 👍

Happy Juneteenth, folks!

Feeling cute might delete later. *no photo is present because I’m to lazy to get up to take one. Just imagine me looking cute*

It was pride night, I thought the boys were supposed to kiss???? ☹️

I just really love you xox

I think they are making the baseball players taller so they are more visible from the stands

Convincing my partners to get an older car with a bench seat and less safety features so we can be cute like the cake song by it’s really so I can do a murder suicide by wrapping it around tree

When I have a sit down pee, it’s not what you think it is

the entire point of life is to be kind and weird btw

he wasn't lying when he said we'd be doing a lot of winning

probably getting fired from my baseball announcer job because i keep saying the batters stroke out

if he's going to keep peddling this bullshit i think he needs to pick a less autistic sport than baseball

I think anyone living with a pet that they love is already practicing polyamory

just imagine: pee

This fucking bird is mocking me

I love baseball announcers cause it's like listening to a podcast that feels like it was recorded by accident

Plate Flip xkcd.com/3258/

oh i get it now. its soccers answer to the world baseball classic