upon reconfirming my allergies extending from food related allergens to include more environmental sensitivities, the more i have since discovered what i wasn’t told by the allergist and nurses—not to mention had to fight to convince them to give me more allergens to test with.

I mean, if you'd like a book with a couple neurodivergent characters who are all women, I wrote one: torpublishinggroup.com/navigational... (It's most obvious with Nhi but everyone in the crew really wouldn't pass the neurotypicality test)

HORROR WRITERS! I WANT YOUR SOUL… I mean DEMONS! I’m editing another awesome anthology for Flame Tree Press. Spread the curse… blog.flametreepublishing.com/fantasy-goth...

listening to many lived experiences, pulling from my own lived experiences, taking the proper care and time to do the work and research heavily, sensitivity readers with the respective disability reality, etc. oftentimes, it’s really just how i would like and hope to be treated. #WeeknightWriters

considering how they navigate and face their circumstances—their disabilities impacts their role in various ways whether challenging them further or inventing new ways to accomplish more while keeping true to themselves + their identity has been an important parts of their stories. #WeeknightWriters

yes, there are a few—including my protagonist that deals with c-pstd, anxiety, selective mutism, amongst a few other things, she also recalls her interactions with other characters she knows that have disabilities themselves, one that is autistic and another with hearing loss. #WeeknightWriters

hoo boy, where to start…? i’ll list to save some time. • toph beifong (atla) • hiccup (httyd) • fran bow (fran bow) • link (totk) • edward elric (fma) • garrett (quest for camelot) and more. Just knowing they exist in various stories and ways are important to me. #WeeknightWriters

almost forgot, mai here, doing my rewrite reworkings on DMH - a fairytale retelling death game. and it’s going alright, got 60 pages of rewritten notes and the likes so far. been a bit stalled due to allergies however amongst other things but trying to get more reworkings in. 🤧 #WeeknightWriters

managing the best i had amid various irl changes and struggles with bad environment sensitivities aka seasonal allergies but been doing some writing reworking for some personal projects. #WeeknightWriters

sometimes i think i’m too responsible growing up because circumstances forced me to, but that doesn’t mean i didn’t recognize there were responsibilities for myself as well as those around me.

thinking about how my hearing appointment today made me want to rant lol.

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not sure why, but was compelled to sing “it’s over, isn’t it?” just now. 🥲

been trying to be more active on insta but not always easy lol.

grieving is such an exhausting existential experience. especially when trying to move forward. or finding yourself again in honour of those loved ones who have passed. 💔

thinking the april exhaustion is finally hitting me. 🥀

learning about how emotional crying can be so taxing to the body and eyes simply because the tears are a higher salt content and stress related means causing inflammation, increased blood flow, and skin sensitivity around the eyes. cause man, blinking is irritating. 🥲

slowly finding my way to writing again.

Eldest and I are playing The Séance of Blake Manor, and the world-building and available historical and topical information is just staggering. It's like wading into what you think is a shallow lake only to step off a ledge and sink 20 feet. I'm still not entirely sure what form the antagonist is.

[cw: discussions of death, family death, grief] finding myself grieving again 8 years after the last close death to me has been a bit of a whiplash. especially finding out about one estranged grandparent followed by the other i have been a caregiver to for two decades hit hard. 💔

this has been a sad month for me. 💔

haven’t been able to write much this month due to several factors is deeply frustrating.

having to take a deep breath whenever something else hits you to keep going is something.

paint mage

been too chaotic and exhausting this week so far to do much progress writing wise but going to see if i can. still want to get this backlog done with so i can feel comfortable with working on my original writing projects again. #amwritingkinda

re-listening to starcraft ost takes me back to 1998 and the nostalgia of it all.

ICE must not be allowed in Toronto. They’ve kidnapped Canadians. They’re currently holding a 7 year old autistic Canadian girl in one of the camps. Boycott all World Cup games happening in the US, and demand ICE stay out of Canada.

been wanting to write but in a weird state of unrest and can’t get comfortable enough to bother it seems. 😔 #amwritingkinda

slowly writing pieces and thoughts into personal essays have been a nice place to impart some considerations i wish i had the chance to speak more on, but often it comes much later after the matter has long passed. lowkey how one starts a memoir of sorts, or something similar.

I’ve watched disability policy get debated like it’s theoretical while it dictates whether people can eat, rest, or survive.

when you realize a title was mixed up with another or isn’t as fitting to the written content of a fic… yup, just had that. 🥲

i love how vast and ranged genres can take you for stories, understandings, and learnings.

when you update to post two new fics only for ao3 to be on the fritz again lol.

been building up writing more and more, but it definitely takes time to rebuild the writing pace i used to be at. but hoping it continues to be built. and will become something again. #amwritingkinda

It’s been six years since Covid was declared a global pandemic. Most people moved on years ago. Decided to go “back to normal” whether it was safe or not. They left people like me by the wayside. They abandoned the vulnerable. They embraced the comfortable lie.

i feel like in a world that is constantly on the go and prides on the value of productive worth…taking your time and taking space for yourself is *so* important.

coming back, coming back, come back to me…

discovering the troubles of having a birch pollen allergy and then finding out about pollen foods a year afterwards than being told has been a trip and a half. tldr: allergists you should tell someone to check into all the details about an allergy rather than just stating be careful being outside…

thinking about escaflowne again and how much i adore the earlier isekais that were more shoujou centric than what it’s become today.

also happy international women’s day, been thinking a lot about the different strengths that come and emerge from women over the years and historically, and will continue to do so towards meaningful progress towards equality.

sometimes it’s hard to keep going when there’s so much to process.

history is so important, not just from an acknowledgement of the past but as both an understanding of the present and preparing for the future. otherwise mistakes are doomed to repeat, just with different players upon an ever-changing stage.

When you’re living with chronic illness, your body calls the shots. It doesn’t matter how hard you try. It doesn’t matter how badly you “want” to do something. There’s time when your body will say “No”. You’re no longer in control and it can be devastating.

“I have usernames older than you.”. Holy shit

don't we all #art #cuteart #comic #cat

sometimes idk if i’ll ever be able to work my way back up to finishing writing a whole book, much less a series of my original projects. but writing fics is building my way back albeit slowly. however, oneshots are only going to get me so far so opted to try a mutlichapter.

thinking about finishing that alan wake 2 theory fic epilogue tribute idea again. but still need to finish alan wake 2. 😔 #amplotting #amwritingkinda

if you're ever wondering if your nice words and support really matter to a writer/artist, this is how we feel when it happens:

Trans people are under attack. They are trying to make them going out in public illegal. They are taking away their licenses. If you cannot see that the moment you unpeople one demographic, you create a gray area for every other demographic, you're beyond hope. Trans rights are human rights.

discovering an unfortunate side effect of a new allergen that you’ve been navigating hits hard. thankfully my mouth is doing better but the rest of the body is just shakey. 😔