Imagine being so correct, so beautiful and so eloquent

guys, i know this is weird but being in san francisco is like having a pebble in my shoe. i cannot feel comfortable here and i have NO IDEA WHY.

a ban isn’t enough, reopen Alcatraz, put every “predictive market” executive & war profiteer gambler in there, and distribute their houses and assets among war refugees

I want Democrats to start talking about prosecuting Kalshi and Polymarket out of existence and charging their executives for the crimes they are committing every day.

This needs to be illegal

first ever book conference panel is done. i didn’t say anything awful OR burp into the mic. i will consider it a success.

i showed up too early to check in for the room i booked so the front desk agent convinced me to get a balcony room. it was worth it, i think.

the former host of celebrity apprentice and the former host of fox & friends weekend are launching bombs and destabilizing the world for generations all because voters decided their biggest issue was a trans kid playing jv tennis with their friends 4 states over

i’m just gonna post like we’re not having the third pointless, senseless middle eastern war of my lifetime for a bit, okay?

i love california real estate insta ads. “just reduced $180,000!!!” ma’am, that’s two houses in indiana probably. this is not something you advertise. (also because a house that has to be reduced in a nice part of California has PROBLEMS)

Are you depressed or are you just an American.

things every single republican president of your lifetime has done - started a war in the middle east - completely destroyed the economy

What "it's a distraction" people fundamentally need to understand about fascism is that fascism's entire mode of operation is diverting popular anger/anxiety/despair into channels of violence against the Other (both internal and external). It's not flailing, it's the whole strategy.

I made a joke earlier that Hegseth congratulated Sam Altman on securing the contract and asked him if he was capable of going to war on Monday. Turns out, I was too generous on the timeline.

Opening AO3

guys, whenever there’s tech glitches at a panel, i have to stop myself from running to the mixing board to fix stuff because once you’re a radio producer you never STOP being a radio producer

GOOD!!!!!

an updated debbie downer sketch but it's friends showing her funny videos and she has to respond like this to every single one like this:

yeah, i live on the edge. i eat beets with a plastic fork.

a fan of this energy tbh, and ambitious politicos should be trying to outdo each other here

catching @ellenbyronla.bsky.social at #LCC talking about something very near to my heart: funny mystery novels! 🩷

Abolish the legal gender marker entirely. No government can be trusted to have a database of which people have changed theirs, no government has any business tracking what your gender is "supposed" to be in the first place.

after a bleh day of travel (my body decided 2am was the right time to wake up for a 7am flight, then my flight was diverted to san jose for 2 hours because sfo was foggy and we *ran out of fuel* to wait out the clouds), i managed to get to two panels today and now it’s time to keep my granny bedtime

I featured a Claire McCardell dress in VIVIANA VALENTINE GETS HER MAN. truly underrepresented when we talk about American fashion.

I have a ton of mutuals with this person, who claims to be a civil rights lawyer. Maybe uhhhh don’t follow them idk just a thought.

ICE Tracker 2/26

Important article. Nothing burns me up more in the literary space than the same folks who praise dark and mafia romance with their whole chests denigrating urban romance. Tell us why you find one genre acceptable but not the other. I’ll wait. baltimorebeat.com/black-urban-...

WHAT: Prada (fall 2026) OCCASIONS: high-school-best-friend-who-would-always-ditch-you-for-a-guy’s engagement party or violinist at conservatory getting super (we’re worried, Ann!) into Mahler IF IT WERE A SCENT: inkwell (toppled) EMOTIONAL RANGE: Joan of Arc/Marian the Librarian #MJMfashionGuide

what? chuck needed hillary to say it first?

i find its also helpful if you imagine the person in OSHA hi vis gear to be Tiny Chef

Also on sale through iBooks!!

airplane seats are a crime against anyone over 5’8” and 150lbs how did we get here

btw, this is on kindle daily deal for $1.99 today, it’d be cool if you reposted this to spread the word. i think most people consider this one the best of my three books and i uh kinda think they’re right a.co/d/0dSehwyt

every time i interact with customer service now, i gleefully take the “how did we do?” survey and type in all caps the person who helped me’s name, five stars, glowing praise, and demand they be given a raise. even if the interaction made me rip my hair out.

If a politician has resisted standing up for trans people or immigrants or women or people of color or the poor or the homeless or victims of genocide, they’ve shown you who they are. There’s no “wait and see.” We’ve already seen more than enough to know.

history of fashion, which was meant for the costume design majors. what a delightful class.

wooo the way people are hacking at the airport i’m happy i have my masks 😳

thank you for spreading the news!!

exciting news! my favorite of the Viviana Valentine books (Goes Up the River) is on promo for $1.99 today! it's a closed house mystery with some great cold war elements and some extremely sweet/cute relationship development for Viv in the background. if you still use kindle, here's that link

i’m about to rip my damn eyelid off thanks to this twitch i’m gonna have to see a damn doctor when i get back to LA

I got an Elena Ferrante yesterday! And Sally Rooney (who signed her name Sally Ronny) a little while back!

truly, trying to remember the names of restaurants and clubs from the early 2000s to write this new book is *taxing* my little gray cells

A book came out recently with a titular character whose name was remarkably similar to my own titular character and when you've been working on a book for *years* it is v. hard to change your names. But I think I managed! Tiny victory!

instantly assumed this was a kaiju situation

Does anyone know of any Gen Z mystery writers?

MFer walked around every day of his adult life with a mouth full of the teeth of folks he owned. Literally every word out of his mouth was shaped by slavery

one of my favorite movie details is when Robin Williams throws something at at Pierce Brosnan in Mrs. Doubtfire’s “run by fruiting,” she hits him… with a lime

A new photo has been released of Rep. Al Green holding up “BLACK PEOPLE AREN’T APES” sign at Donald Trump's State of the Union.

my biggest emotional trigger is when people interact with me with “you should” statements. so much so that when i was in high school i had a slight snap and spent a week carrying around a “suggestion box” because if people wouldn’t stop telling me what to do, i’d prefer if they wrote it down 😂