Guy who goes to chuck e cheese for a slice and a pint on his lunch break

If the Super Bowl was patriots rams I was gonna blow my shit off smooth

Guy who explodes if he touches snow: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH *explodes*

Guy who bursts out laughing every time he gets to 6 and 7 when counting his reps at the gym

Tummy hurt

Dude if I was a pufferfish, I’d be puffed up all the time bro

Them damn wokes trying to change it to Christmas Steve

Here’s my top artists and spotify somehow has the gall to call me a boomer just bc I like Jimi Hendrix and steely Dan 😤

Cited the Bible in my chemistry exam where I mentioned the elements being air, water, earth, and fire. Why did I get a zero? I’m being persecuted for my beliefs!

Bunson Boone

Dude last night was a psalm

If you haven’t watched Frankenstein yet you gotta check that shit out

Had a dream that I was playing guitar hero with Sabrina carpenter and she was cool af

ESPN sucks so much ass. Why am I getting an update about a missed dunk?

Now the fans are asking how many wins we are capable of now that we have a taste of victory. And to that I say we’re never losing again babyyyyyyyy 😤😤😤

Fans of my fantasy team be like

Remembered Will’s gym shoes today

FazolisFan42

Literally me if anyone fucking cares

Having a cigarette (Coke Zero)

Bald. Bold. Beautiful. Booting up Deadlock.

Hahahaha omg this guy freaking RULES

God this guy fucking sucks

whoaaaaAAaaa @the-lil-will.bsky.social

DAMN. 3 sips in, y’all ever heard of this shit??

Feels like my life has been a machine gun fire of bad news for the past 2 years. Shit is demoralizing

Me and my pal hunter about so seeing the new Superman flick!

Welp I guess I’ll never own a house or have reliable healthcare

They really labeled Luigi a terrorist and haven’t once labeled a guy who assassinated a government official as a terrorist…

Incredible graphics over at trumps little bday thing

Pretty dope that my phone gave me this update 40 min after the sirens stopped 😃

😔😔

And when all was quiet, the orb returns.

Guys I really hope Richard is surprised

Erm I’m thinking it’s modelo time

2013 Toyota rav4 STUNS in new photo

Dear grok is it possible to suck the cancer out of someone’s prostate. Asking for a friend. Thank you and God bless.

He just like me fr

Pope Beast 🙏 Pope Beast 🙏 Pope Beast 🙏

Message to anyone who was thinking about taking Atlas’s new bone: Don’t. 😤

There’s nothing like eating a whole lobster with your hands at a baseball game and wiping your fingers off on the shirt of the guy sitting in front of you #baseball

Happy holiday(s)

Throwing one on the grill for Steph Curry and my buddy Kory tonight