Gonna start playing Heartopia on the side. Still enjoy WWM more than any other game on a personal level but many people are finding it overwhelming. Meanwhile, Heartopia is a simpler "cozy" game. And I just...... really, really, deeply miss my friends. So much. So, yeah...

Today, I am filled with a deep, profound loneliness. I miss them. Fear I cannot reach them. All I can do is talk and talk... ...about my hopes & fears & frustrations & joys... ...& hope it reaches them, somehow. And hope our connection was more than a place, a space, a race. Hope.

What's funny is my ma asked my utterly indifferent step-dad at what point would he actually care enough to openly stand against Trump. He said, "when he goes for my guns." But seriously, that time is now. SO, EVERYONE THAT FUCKING SAID THE SAME SHIT: YOUR TIME HAS COME.

I am seeing quite a few nurses calling for a nationwide strike over the killing of Alex Pretti. I think we are seeing one of the largest workforces being radicalized before our very eyes.

load bearing tweet for a settler colonial society

My car is literally fused frozen to the ground and no amount of ice picking and scraping can free it this morning. I managed the previous few times but not now... ...but I'll die in a ditch before staying in this hospital's "accomodations." Home is an hour walk away... Wish me luck. o.o

My body is trying to assert a day schedule lately, which is bizarre because I'm usually a night person. It's like some part of me is desperately trying to avoid S.A.D. But I work the next 3 nights and being sleep deprived while driving over black ice seems like a woefully bad idea...

Got a bounty put on me today for immobilizing cheaters using auto-gathering macros on off their horses. 1.) Yes the horse is convenient but monopolizing an entire zone while you afk is more than pushing it. EITHER ACTUALLY PLAY THE GAME OR GTFO, bro. 2.) Civil Disobedience! xD Absolutely worth it.

I've officially broken past 2 Geese on my Healer build! 😁 There's only some minor points to max (Inner Ways & the Mystics I wanna try in group/boss content) and it's done until the next level cap increase! So will be working on Tank build real soon.

My best friend said she found a game like Palmon but I looked up the parent company (Joy Nice Games) and all they seem to make is heavy p2w gatcha games...

You know what's one of the most annoying things about online gaming? When people from random parts of the world randomly contact you out of nowhere to try to make friends, but it feels out of the blue and very, very forced. Like...

I've been every game boss except the one with the lady and the ball & I'm just trying to get my mystics up to snuff. ^^ Have to say, the growth I've had overcoming bosses I'd initially thought challenging has been... so extremely rewarding!

You know what? Against my better judgements, I tried the damn Remeron at sleep two mornings ago... ...and after hours of... panic inducing dreams, constantly waking up with a deep sense of dread & feeling like I'd left critical tasks undone... slept like the dead until this fucking morning...

So I chose to do full healer spec first, partly because early game (until they nerf it) it seems most OP against bounty hunters and griefers... I am 5 levels away from current character MAX and am making progress on the rest... nearly 1.9 geese which is... decent...

Okay, level 70 now and methodically trying to catch up on content useful to level grinding, which means.... time to attempt Wolf Girl again... ...she was the first time I felt really humbled early in the game so.... yeah.... wish me luck. 😐 ##wwm

That was the most comprehensive psychiatric example I've ever had and the dude says there's still more to figure out... but he's saying he agrees, most of my past diagnoses don't fit consistently, but he's saying it's because of several points of trauma in my life...

Trying to fully get excited for my day off but some part of me just wants to bed rot lololololololol.

So it goes.

You know, I have to say: after coming from a game with one of the biggest f2p-p2w gaps I've ever experienced, while offering so very little in actual quality content? Having WWM be an absolute GLUT of content, anti-p2w, and with the final boss being the FUCKING GOD OF RICHES AND GREED? POETIC.

Looking at alll the resources it has taken to get this far along with the sort of daily/weekly limits on the mats it takes to get this or that item to build with and the sheet depth to the builds in the game, I think... I gotta lock in on one build at a time...

So, I let a false accusation expire just to see how the bounty system worked and the person jumping into my solo mode game caused SO MUCH lag I could barely tell what the hell was happening? I was in the middle of fighting bandits, too. Is it always like that??? 😅 #wwm

Omg, I found a Cat Cafe. o.o And THIS was outside omg omg.

I only use the service once in a while but I'm going to stop ordering from restaurants that don't use tamper-evident seals... feeling like shit is bad enough without also wondering if some random delivery guy drunk half my drink in spite of me leaving a maximum tip up front.

I love that I highkey aspirated this weekend on freakin' energy drink.. I'm talking lungs burning level aspiration like usually I only get that when I have a violent GI vomit episode... and had to spend the last couple of days dealing with what is clearly a lower respiratory infection... 😑

Merry Chrysler to those whomst celebrate 🦝🎄

So I've stopped at level 60, for the time being, and will likely remain "weak" for my level for a little while due to being in the "collection" phase of what I'm calling "cultivation work." Now that I can see the way player strength development fully works I've refined my plan, there...

Yooooooooo. Is injected lidocaine really supposed to kick in within seconds?!?!?!

You know end of the day, queer is queer, love who you love as long as it's consensual, idc, but... ...I really wish heteroflexible/homoflexible/etc. were more accepted and used when applicable. There's enough of a distinction, for example, between someone who's TRULY equal opportunity...

Last two weeks of shifts saw me working with a whole slew of confused combative patients who were ready to throw down while I was trying to protect them from themselves. Some of which were built like competitive wrestlers or linebackers...

This was actually rather amusing lmfao.

So I finished the main questline for WWM (so far) and it was... very fitting, actually. Now until the next xpac, I just gotta... -Run useful dailies for goodies. -Complete the 2948359 secondary, tertiary, quarternary quests. -Get to max level. -Cultivate min/max my builds & gear.

I've already been working out different builds for different scenarios I wanted and JUST NOW realized I can actually SAVE these builds for later. 😮 #wwm

I already maxed out the weekly credits for some in-game currencies and Battle Pass XP I can earn.... ...I may just be playing too much, lmfao. 😂

Waking up actually excited to do chores and game on my day off. I missed this feeling. 😁

if fentanyl is a weapon of mass destruction, I guess that makes me….. Dr. Evil?? RELEASE THE FENTANYL

I write for an audience that is experiencing rapid cognitive decline. Those are my people.

Actually, I think I maynneed to rethink my approach, and for two big reasons: one, friends are actually showing interest in the game enough that the guild is no longer at risk of dissolving & I don't feel I have to hold back & wait so much; & 2, the sheer amount of game content INCLUDES...

Are your most fundamental beliefs that human beings deserve dignity and have a right to rule themselves, or that your team deserves to win

The other thing I think I need to start doing again is use this blog space to ramble & dump my feelings & thoughts out safely, so I don't burden others with them all unsolicited. People can come visit this space & interact with my bees (lol) only when/if they have the energy for it & vice versa. 🤗

Since coming clean with my game friends I've been focusing more on a game that I'm actually enjoying, even though for the moment it means playing without them: Where Winds Meet. It'd sort of healing the parts of me that were insulted and slighted by the absurdities of Palmon, so...

Maybe.... maybe it's just.... time to let go.

God I hate this shit gatcha game SO MUCH. If I hadn't made friends in it I would've happily moved on from it OVER SIX FUCKING MONTHS AGO. IT'S SUCH A BAD GAME I WANN PLAY WHERE WINDS MEET INSTEAD PLEAAAAAAASE.