Gomeran derby between 2 of the SIX teams on this island of 23,000 people. UD Gomera at home to Vallehermoso, complete with around 500 people, two parasols giving the only bits of shade and one megaphone - ¡Vamos Vallehermoso! - providing the atmosphere.

It’s the anniversary of this outrageous skill from David Ginola in 1996. Magnifique, old son. Magnifique.

Not interested in what Slot has to say about #NUFC but I wish people would stop repeating his claptrap about Isak not training all summer. This is him at a 5-day training camp in Austria in July. And here he is choosing to train at Real Sociedad (not our fault if he was on a pintxo binge instead).

If Robert Jenrick thinks the story of 1980s football hooliganism is ‘The police put a quick but firm end to it’, I’ve a big bag of magic beans that he’s gonna *love*

After smugly telling everyone last week how well he’d handled Isak in comparison to other managers, Tomasson’s now played him for every minute of fwo games, lost both and is very likely about to get the sack. Oh well.

Valle Gran Rey, La Gomera. Centre a 15th century local uprising against Spanish rule and now the hot spot for boneshaker bikes, German hikers (+ a few Brits) and vegan bakeries. Only place on the island where you can wander through a banana plantation then see the Bundesliga on TV.

I’ve missed watching Lewis Hall play football #nufc

Called the old man on the final whistle and he reckoned Liberaceki did well for Barcelona tonight.

Barnes left, Gordon centre is not an experiment I’d be in a hurry to repeat.

Building the Angel of the North, 1998, photo by Trevor Ermel.

Not usually one to share screenshots from the other place, but on days like this I can’t help remembering the bloke who was absolutely certain Sandro Tonali was worth no more than £12-15 million.

What a cross from Jacob Murphy. He frustrates the hell out of me 4-5 times a game minimum but when he gets it right…

Great result for England, but Serbia have folded like Luka Jovic’s reputation since that one good season at Frankfurt. Also, genuinely mad to think so many people reckoned Elliot Anderson wasn’t worth £35 million last summer (or, more accurately, £15 mill + a keeper we didn’t want).

Not going to get enraged by players posting Instagram stories to an ex-teammate but it might have been a bit more politic, and more personal, to have just sent him a WhatsApp instead #nufc

This is 100% Bruno and Joelinton, isn’t it?

Think, knowing Howe, we can just about rule out anyone coming from abroad today. He’ll want PL experience, the number 9 shirt is still vacant and Brentford currently have exactly the same calculation to make about Wissa as we had with Isak. Do Spurs try for him? If not, I think we up the bid and…

I’ve enjoyed all these videos but this, as I knew it would be, is pitch perfect stuff from Bill Corcoran, who should be invited in to talk to every new player about the club, the city and its people: m.youtube.com/shorts/W8d9k... #nufc

Can some reality TV producer please make the Woltemade, Osula and Elanga house share happen? Highlights presented by Big Dan Burn, pay per view for PSR.

Playing ability aside, pleased to see that Woltemade didn’t throw a massive sulk after agreeing personal terms with Bayern and then seeing Stuttgart turn down “market value” bids over the summer. Already played and scored for the club paying his wages this season - imagine that!

No need to panic if we don’t get another striker in before Monday: we already know what Shola Ameobi can do against Barcelona and Bayer Leverkusen.

I'm hearing he's pushing to play for Brazil instead. #nufc

You wouldn’t have guessed which club has had the “nightmare” summer and which has supposedly done everything right. We’ll be ok with this spirit - UNITED! - & an extra forward, and Arsenal are very probably winning the league unless Liverpool’s next big signing can help out in midfield or defence.

If nothing else positive comes from Isak’s IG story ploy, it did, in a roundabout way, bring this fabulous excerpt from Michael Owen’s 32-page brochure back to mind. “Aspirational, dynamic, sincere…”

A reminder for the more excitable Liverpool fans - Free Isak! No player will ever sign for you again! - that in the summer of 2017, Liverpool rejected THREE bids for Coutinho, released a public statement that he wouldn’t be sold, rejected the transfer request he made in response to that statement..

After reading and carefully processing Isak’s latest self-pitying piffle, I’m happy to restore this bloke’s rightful crown as Newcastle United’s greatest ever Swedish forward…

Yes, because English football has, quite uniquely, always been about spending only what you earn and nobody’s suggesting the current implementation of PSR is related to cementing the status quo of clubs who wanted, coincidentally, to form a separate, closed competition based on existing wealth.

Forget Ramos and Wissa, get these two in before next weekend and we’re flying.

“The River Plate Red and a bottle of Boca Juniors, señor.”

If you’re sick of reading about you know who, this is a lovely, personal piece about Thiaw, Düsseldorf and why he’ll feel at home at NUFC.

This constant chatter from people pushing one perspective or another might seem clever to some agents but it’s also making Isak look arrogant, aloof and massively entitled with a complete lack of respect for his coach, club, teammates and fans. Even if true, not sure it’s the wisest media strategy.

Don’t know how good Malick Thiaw will turn out to be, but I very much approve of us signing a player born in Düsseldorf. “You know what this means, don’t you? I’m half bloody German now, man!”

If right, the latest Luke Edwards article’s a very high-risk approach. “Stop acting like a child and do your job” is a message more players need to hear - there’s still a way out where he quits sulking and leaves next summer (the Suarez way) but not sure there’ll be any bridges left intact on Sep 1.

My wife’s currently experiencing the joys of UK immigration policy as - with a Spanish residency permit, a ticket to the Maldives and a 90-min gate-to-gate transfer at Heathrow T5 - various officials try to work out whether she does or doesn’t need a visa (she doesn’t, but…). Go for growth, eh?

Isak way past Kane and on to Luis Suarez 2013 (the summer of the £40,000,001 bid) levels of strop. Don’t really care at this point what he thinks he deserved or where he ends up - just use the money to get 2 or 3 forwards with the right attitude who can learn and be bothered to run a bit up top.

Sunday morning by the sea.

It’s a side note with everything else that’s going on, but I hope Isaac Hayden fixes up a move to a really good club. Will always be grateful for his work in the depressingly fallow years - a big part of the group that got us promotion and then managed to keep things afloat when Rafa left.

So glad we didn’t have this endless commentary when an unhappy Shearer briefly flirted with other clubs or Ginola fancied joining Barcelona. Thanks to the minute-by-minute inanity of this summer, everyone knows almost nothing about what’s happening and yet far more than we ever need to know.

I’m sure there’s a lot of linguistic cross-pollination with social media nowadays, but “rat” seems much more Scouse than Geordie. Think most adult Geordies would have more likely gone with Judas or greedy bastard.

Took the bus to my first ever away game (Tyne - Wear derbies apart) from here. Derby County, Aug ‘92: no Brian Coddington but plenty of Franzie Carr.

Sweltering Sunday for the 228th anniversary of the Battle of Santa Cruz (the one where Nelson lost his arm). A bit of slow marching, a band struck up the national anthems and then the British signed their capitulation and headed off for a café con leche.

Pre-season run-out at Icod de Los Vinos away.

Whatever else we’ve learned this summer, it’s 100% clear what a brilliant job Howe and Tindall did last season managing disgruntled star players, executive-level turmoil and the aftermath of a chaotic summer. Major trophy and CL at the end of all that? Manager(s) of the Year by a mile.

Lovely reminder from @camsell59.bsky.social about Jarrow Roofing and Jan, the tea lady / PA announcer, on the latest WSC pod. Also, phantom goal announcements, fancy sweets, a fantastic Bobby Stokes anecdote and zero mentions of PSR or transfer windows: www.listennotes.com/podcasts/whe...

No transfer speculation or PSR nonsense at this Spanish birthday party. Suggestion for future transfer windows: after two hours on a bouncy castie, stick all the things people are after in a paper container, bash it with a stick and then have a mad scramble for whatever you can get your hands on.

If only I had a pound for everyone on here who’s absolutely sure they know exactly what’s going on between Newcastle, Liverpool, Eintracht Frankfurt and Alexander Isak, despite having been completely and vocally certain of the opposite only yesterday.

Just had to dispense with a locust (!) that was crunching its way through my sunflowers, which is not a pest problem I ever experienced growing up in suburban NE32. Now feel like a cross between Moses and Jolyon Maugham in that silk kimono.

Some couldn’t look past him never living up to the early Rice/Carrick comparisons, & it took a long time to get over injury and Bruce, but a hugely under-appreciated cog in a seriously good 22-23 team. Should always be remembered for Southampton, PSG, and playing through pain when needed in 23-24.

The Atlantic Longsands - Teresitas Beach, with sand imported from the Sahara and Santa Cruz de Tenerife behind.

School (or summer camp at the school) run views. Not a fan of the long - June to mid-September - school holidays here but can’t moan too much about 7 weeks of a camp for 300 euros including food and 1 day a week at a beach club. And this morning walk…

All this controversy about Rising Sun flags in kit launch videos reminds me of the time I lived in Seoul and three separate people opened Nazi-themed bars called ‘The Fifth Reich’. Strange times…https://time.com/archive/6954934/they-dressed-well/