I am going to explode my whole house & the surrounding area ( slightly nauseated)

just left work about to hop onto my exact job simulator for 8 hours to relax

dudes that look like homophobes always have the tightest little asses

Im deep in the ring community rn starting to say shit like “anybody hear that ?”

my city sounds like gotham when it rains bc nobody know how to drive (old nd white )

trying to impress the guy that hates his veteran father “can we steal valor for 15% off”

trying to impress the girl that woke up angry today “Ive never bought anything on sale before”

instead of my life flashing before my eyes its just my posts ,and the really bad ones get shown a full minute longer than the rest as a form of retribution

if you're as much of a fan of eating microplastics as I am, try the new rocket pop oreos. I can feel the force feminization from the phytoestrogens really coursing through my veins

hitting a. devious lick ( eating pussy)

I hate when people hit on me Im a teenager in adult years this is illegal

I have multiple dreams a week about jacking off

guy entrusted with motherhood

black cat named mayo

family heirloom of my skeets in a scrapbook that I cry over to my great grandchildren ( hallucinated)

I have flashbacks to my old posts

gay men cry out in dismay when dming me about my peepee parts

who else fitfully tossing and crying out in their sleep

Im trans in the way that I wake up horny bc I realize Im in a girls body

x files is just straight people supernatural

can someone with armpit scissoring experience please contact me

she never blinks

the vet: okay. I know you dont have a real name yet, but what am I putting down for her records ? me, panicked: stephanie curry chicken

suddenly Ive never thought of a name in my life

losing what little sanity I have left trying to capture 2 kittens under my mothers house

Dick so small had to add alt text so she can see it.

the thunder is talkin to me

lavender marriage between a gay guy thats secretly a girl, and a lesbian thats openly a boy ,and they only fuck eachother & are in love

shaking with excitement as someone finally jiggles my unlocked front doorknob sitting criss cross against the wall with a beretta 1301

my hairclips have the life expectancy of a rodent in the care of a small child

Nonbinary named Soap who doesn’t do dishes. Nonbinary named Fern who doesn’t go outside

called someone 2 fix my AC nd Im sitting here on the couch shirtless drinking chocolate milk straight from the carton to demonstrate the severity of the situation

putting my roommates retainers on while shes gone ,bc I miss her

nature or nurture Im a freak of both

Imm. turnnt up off theBob rn fujjhhkc

just crackin open a cold bob

lotta money in the cock business

woke up from a dream in which I was jusr. sleeping Im pissed

the first step of bottom surgery will be a visit from the Explosive Ordnance Disposal squad to defuse this bomb ass pussy

I can’t post my tomodachi gameplay bc its just various fictional serial killers ,and regulars at my job that I hate & I make their house interiors the jail cell to run the stanford prison experiment on them when Im angry

WHAT am I doing wrong (dont ask whats wrong with me Idk)

Hey quick question do you hit girls

I only like skittles bc they taste like advil

trying to cut someones leg off & eat it at the first sign of turbulence on a plane

now that I think about it soggy biscuit sounds british in nature someone look into this

I feel like outlast trials could just be another name for soggy biscuit

fuck I gotta fix my snakeroot ass feed DAMN

adhd wife with only canned goods and frozen food, and autistic gf with only beef and rice

Im giving up on perishables

I cant be in any survival setting for more than 30 mins- I could be at a fully stocked campsite & start seriously considering cannibalism 1 hour in