this is the fair compromise. he can have the peace prize but only for doing the covid vaccine

trying to get my 10th grade english class of inner city gang members and dangerous loners to care about the world series by explaining that the dodgers are like kendrick lamar and the blue jays are drake. i’m immediately pelted with rocks and slip into a permanent coma

you don’t need to bring your dog to the grocery store

you don’t need to bring your dog to the grocery store

shut the fuck up

do women like men who buy their pants at home depot?

again, what is driving them insane is that winning 49.5% of the vote in a close election has not granted them total dominion over american life and culture. the idea that life might go on more or less as before. that we might enjoy a bite to eat and ball our special someone tonight offends fhem

found a guy

all three million of those followers have killed themselves

women don’t like the vehicle

azealia banks met the average israeli

is there a song better than the grateful dead’s st. stephen? probably. there are a lot of songs and i haven’t heard them all but st. stephen is a really good one

beautiful editor’s note

i got a glock in my rari

ratlimit is a greatest of all time poster

i see the VP's full on backing of the hitlerite group chat as showing the GOP understands that their power in large part flows from their unified front. meanwhile the democrats continue to attack their left and progressive members. not a surprise the GOP keeps running circles around them

you know what would be really funny

she just yelled at me for not petting her

everything’s computer

accidentally sent a slow motion nut video to the work group chat 😖

twitter sucks. maybe i should hang out here more

it’s so easy to make people mad here i love it

today’s beans

Wow, I can’t get to sleep! I’ll simply count all the genders in my head until I drift away! - The “WOKE” Snoozer 😴 🛌

my kid showed me a picture of a manul and i said “that’s my slime”

just soyfaced through the entire mickey 17 trailer

now seated

a lot going on here

been working on this for a few years

it's here

DEI was taken from us a week ago. Now 67 people are dead. HOW MANY MORE MR PRESIDENT

today’s beans

if Woke has a million fans, then i am one of them. if Woke has ten fans, then i am one of them. if Woke has only one fan then that is me. if Woke has no fans, then that means i am no longer on earth. if the world is against Woke, then i am against the world.

BEHOLD!!!

Does anyone know this guy "Congress" everyone keeps mentioning? How do we get in touch with him?

GOP: *freeze federal funding and immediately do catastrophic damage to everyone of any party in a way that threatens longterm cascading destabilization* Chuck Schumer, rushing to BlueSky: John Fetterman and I have written a strongly worded letter to the drones everyone saw in New Jersey last month,

if Woke has a million fans, then i am one of them. if Woke has ten fans, then i am one of them. if Woke has only one fan then that is me. if Woke has no fans, then that means i am no longer on earth. if the world is against Woke, then i am against the world.

if you are on x the everything app i am still looking for ~12,000 of my favorite enemies

should i start posting here again

welcome to bluesky @johnfetterman.com i’d like to be the first to say fuck you, nobody likes you, go fuck yourself

you’re mistaking excitement about the dems not running a walking corpse for excitement about kamala

fellas we gotta make gunther famous on instagram

important