economic warfare, the most sacred of warfares

where marshal of the supreme court

former #1 american gigadad SLEEPTRAINCEL pablohineytrap DEMOTED to COMPLEX SLEEP PHASE DISORDER after being brutally SNOOZMOGGED by TOOTHCUTMAXXING toddler - drool on clavicle CONFIRMED

thursday afternoon vibe check

CIA is Gender

“why aren’t the Youth cookmaxxxing” (2026)

“Have you ever considered occupational therapy?” (Assumes they mean as a career path) “Now why would I do that?”

Her (playing with my hair coyly, with breathy lust): “what are you thinking about right now?” Me (turning my head into her, whispering): “cheese”

Cheese time!

Me to new male friend: “we’re moving too fast”

Everything going great at the newly svelte Washington Post.

turns out there is no usps help portal for ‘mail hasn’t shown up for anyone in the neighborhood for FIFTEEN DAYS, i think my letter carrier is on a truly gnarly bender’

doing the benicio del toro bump fire but i paint the sidewalk and need to reload and get kicked in the nuts

who up alekseyev posting

We have General Donovan at home

my keto-cured-my-schizophrenia assertion sure is raising a lot of questions answered by my keto-cured-my-schizophrenia assertion

George converts to Hari Krishna in an attempt to secure Angleton family photo album. Elaine plots to sabotage a practitioner’s celibacy while also claiming her own faith to assuage Lynne Cheney’s suspicions. Jerry‘s father is being honey trapped. Kramer narrowly escapes fateful Potomac canoe ride.

Sure there are rumors that Angleton dropped acid with George Hunter White, or that he wandered Chinatown tripping face in the 1950’s - but then how does one explain the ska?

“im the one natural one make it easy we can take it inside” (2026)

"who’s this jabroni" (2026)

Deleting the Orb now that I know it's compromised. Find me on the Paradromic Rings.

don't! at the Phrenology

“Our rights are inviolable!” “Would you settle for one inviolable football broadcast time slot per year?”

paint your fuckin’ rusty ass spy ship you lazy bastards

people fr be underestimating the equatorial bulge

best lana del rey songs for kids

it’s when first sergeant makes everyone in the scif take their cat ears off 😿 (2026)

so vexed rn, to nightmare even

why is there a spaghetti pentagram in the hallway again

WHAT

“we reap as we sow, even if the harvest is thirty-five summers in the growing“

guys I think we’re going to have to make them choose between being holland, the netherlands, or dutch, for the west

smoking on that double whammy raw clam vibrio algal bloom paralytic shellfish poisoning fever dream pack, that hep a puke until you see god notorious norovirus chills shit

BUCK: And as the graphic shows, Darnold is like the marksman Revolver Ocelot. But sometimes, his arm is taken over by Liquid Snake, the genetic twin of Solid Snake, who, when it comes to Metal Gear RAY, has is own agenda. AIKMAN: That's right, Joe.

“You know, I actually think your country has been treated unfairly and is entitled to a peaceful nuclear program.” “That’s so refreshing to hear.” ” I work for CIA” “FYUUUUUUUUICCCKFKK” (wobblefuzz)

can't shake this idea so now it burns your eyes

[Enters 2026 with the knowledge that blowing my nose carries ~60% chance of inducing a sinus infection.] Me, waking up January 1: “fuck it let’s blow.”

Some folks are worried the Mayor doesn’t look like the last one. Others are worried the man will be consumed inevitably by the System. I’m worried he’s in a committed relationship with a cluster B disordered personality. Guess I am just built differently.

“can’t even look at a Walter or some cartoon duck smoking without feeling like ‘fuuuuuucck‘”(2025)

everywhere I look I see hidden agendas, secret alliances, and shadowy figures. except for my mysterious benefactor, who is beyond reproach

who up romanticizing cigarettes

Them: “You’ll shoot your eye out with that thing!” Me: [Shooting off my dick] “have a little christmas spirit”