He's overly warm and self conscious and is trying to say 'fuck it'!

My thighs just keep getting hairier

I’m insatiable today

I need a bedtime bj

happy #fcf it’s such a beautiful day :)

another one from yesterday

hello friends I’m back happy #fcf :)

Misreading “blizzard conditions” as “bizarre conditions” and finding that both can be true

Let's give this site a try!

look over there!

I’ve decided this is my place today

Sunday gym session done

it rained

My biggest pet peeve is when people say "as" when they mean "because". The causal "as" exists only for poets struggling with meter and that's fucking it

"Don't know why I'm so stressed out rn," I say as I turn on another episode of Bethenny Ever After

Shoulder cat keeps me warm on snowy days

Early mornings with this guy (because he meowed me awake because he wanted food) 🫰🫰🫰

Jersey Train, reskeet with a pic of you in a jersey Shoutout to my rugby friends 😘

National Geographic, they're GAY. They are HOMOSEXUAL LOVERS

Here’s the other one btw 🐽

So crazy when a little kid speaks French. Like damn that's a fancy child

You know what day it is 🗣️ #fcf (or if you're new here: it's fat cock friday)

My cat Numenor has bladder stones :( she'll be ok but if anyone has advice for female cats with bladder stones please let me know. She's getting special food and pain meds

Happy Birthday pt. 2

DEVASTATING: this woman turned on The Lord of the Rings movie to play in the background while she cleans the house but is now glued to the TV and narrating the prologue alongside Cate Blanchett

Repost with a pic of yourself and your favorite Pokémon! My beloved Skarmory

These juicy asses have me ready to breed one 😈👀

I’d say we’re so back but it’s more like we’re so side profile #mcm

imagining what it would be like if this was yalls pov 👉🏼👈🏼

📚💙 repost with your five favourite reads from this year 1. The Pillars of the Earth - Ken Follett 2. Perdido Street Station - China Miéville 3. The Vegetarian - Han Kang 4. A Desolation Called Peace - Arkady Martine 5. Rebecca - Daphne du Maurier

On the shores of Green Bay, which is actually very blue

throwing up on some guy's dick in a public bathroom in vienna was my Before Sunrise

When you catch @ockham-after-dusk.bsky.social taking shower pictures, he makes you join in

I impulsively rearranged all my living room furniture, hated it, and moved it all back. A metaphor? I should ask my downstairs neighbor, I wonder if they're awake

Milwaukee tinder is either "you ran out of profiles" or "lives in Chicago"

Bonus hotel mirror shots 😘

Posted a shortened version of this on the main for funsies, but y'all get the whole reveal

Working with an international team can be hard, but not today. I basically have the day off for Bulgarian Unification Day :)

If I can hear you chewing you are ruining my life

That's ok Tumblr mobile you can have the day off too