Watching ICE agents literally run away from a Mount Laurel Starbucks without their coffee because the neighborhood completely rejected them is pure gold. South Jersey will make you unwelcome every single time you show your faces.

Very intrigued about Claire Stapleton’s new book

Written by a guy who easily exceeds Pete Hegseth's masculinity standards and testosterone levels. I dare pervy Pete to re-post that quote.

Jeefing at 12:30 totally ruining my bedtime 😈

Qveen herby shows always have the best vibes.

jeef and a sheng wang w @iamdeseree.bsky.social

I’m so scary you guys, look how scary I am.

How about these little baby penis fucktard tiny men trying to come for me. Lol

lol the lady in Office Romance went from water broke to had a baby in 1.5 minutes.

How many goldfish is too many? Asking as a concerned mom of an 8yr old.

Also my vibe open.spotify.com/track/38Ngie...

Song I’m vibing with lately open.spotify.com/track/7gPrkm...

I’m having a midlife “I want a tattoo.” crisis.

I’m having a midlife “should we move to NYC?” crisis.

I’m having a midlife “should I get bangs?” crisis

I got my birthday card in the mail from my grandma. I’m turning 41. I’m so lucky. ❤️

One of the worst cuts of my frozen pizza career.

My kids love Mikey Day which is funny to me. My daughter just told me a whole thing about it.

*me eating the whole carton of blackberries because having the poop thing and a long bit of time off from work really might be a fair trade off*

What’s that thing where you pull out your hair? Sometimes in the shower I wonder if I have that.

So can we claim the poopy thing bacteria to use sick time?

Rock and roll musician: splish splash I was taking a bath People in the 1950's: this is the devil’s music

Socialism is what they called public power. Socialism is what they called social security. Socialism is what they called the growth of free and independent labor organizations. Socialism is their name for almost anything that helps all the people. —Harry Truman, 1952

Stop acting like basic human rights are political. It’s not, it’s a right.

There should be a Girls Scouts badge for “yay girl, you intimidated your first man!”

There should be a Girls Scouts badge for “yay girl, you learned how to save for your future!”

Eating crackers on my 8year olds squishmallow is poetic justice.

There should be a Girl Scouts badge for “yay girl, you filed your first HR complaint!”

Can someone make a VPN for real life? I would like to reboot from another country please.

It’s quiet quitting time, yay!!

But I’m snuggled in bed with my hubs and my bubs. I need to calm. And recognize that joy is healing.

Standing up for yourself is fucking hard.

Sleeping with your parents as a young kid is never quite as fun as you think it’s going to be.

I ask for a moderate level of decorum. Shit the bed.

I’m an idea machine, spitting ideas like a typewriter. Rat a tat tat.

It’s only Monday and I wanna die

I can’t wait to take a break from work when I’m 75

I think I’ve given up on running in the house as a rule. It’s just impossible to stop

Sweating through my shirt at work. Hot flashes or adrenaline?

damn i almost forgot that i’m beautiful and sweet and funny and they hate me bc i’m a reflection of everything they’ll never be

How will I sleep tonight

The platinum people finally got me.

One of my favorite things to say to men is “excuse me, I wasn’t finished.”

Not every people gonna be my people and that’s just fine.

I would like cookies and ice cream delivered to my mouth please.

My undies are the color of my eyes.

A late-in-life visual arts career? Stranger things have happened.

I’m a good person, I’m a good person, I’m a good person, I’m a good person, I’m a good person, I’m a good person. I say to myself constantly. Maybe I’ll believe it.

No joke, a New Yorker subscription was the gift that brought me the most repeat joy and curiosity this year.