When an app hits your feed by a chaser with needs, that's Amoura

Looks like Waygu Beef Wellington is back on the menu, boys! - Uruk-Hai Society Types

people in the future could call me the dumbest ugliest asshole in history and i wouldn't care because i'm dead. why worry about it

it won't be new to have a Nazi in the senate but it will be new for them to be so proud of it

oh man, evo's fucked now huh

gifting my friend a year's subscription to projared's onlyfans as a prank only to find out they have a ferret-faced men fetish

i swear im not severely mentally ill im just a video game character tethered to my house and the further i go away from it the faster my stamina drops

watching an old episode of mythbusters and mourning what has been lost

gifting my friend a year's subscription to projared's onlyfans as a prank only to find out they have a ferret-faced men fetish

Oh fuck yeah I've been hunting for a copy for years

also arrested was American national John Hemburger

does that visual novel actually have a great story or do you have stockholm syndrome from spending six hundred hours reading a picture book for sixteen year olds

i just learned about weltschmerz. so that's what i've been feeling every day for the last seven years

dr phil just woke up in a cold sweat

this movie isn't good but it's extremely fun. sam rockwell was inspired casting

I wonder what info China can get from my car that they haven't gotten from the hacks of my health insurance, my bank, my ISP, my college, and every single website I've ever used

i don't care if i get cancelled, i'm gonna say it cheesecake is kinda gross

MARILYN MONROE: Oh honey. I could fall in love with you a thousand times. Come to bed darling. 😘 ROMCOM AI AVATAR OF ANY GUY WHO WOULD USE THIS: Feet bitch show feet. Step in jelly big boobs toe squish wet feet. Marilyn crying big painful swollen feet. MARILYN MONROE: That's a great idea sweetie.

there's an easy solution here Tony Dokoupil's Tequila Tuesdays

finally finished my readthrough of the One Piece manga now accepting bets on who the man with the burn scar will be

Hey, Niko! It's your cousin, Roman. Let's go bowling!

lmao they're gonna use a staged assassination to make US train travel even worse

do we know the reason that the would-be shooter was going to spare Kash Patel specifically?

the thing about being blue maga is that you're still colossally stupid. there is no way you know how to tie your shoes

what the fuck do you think "no kings" is about

oh is something wrong with github? news to me, i sleep in a big bed with my wife

Okay, fine. You can keep your AI "coding" tools but we're replacing all the models with SmarterChild

this is really cool but i'd also be incandescent with rage over Walz jacketing himself in my good deed while having not done a fucking thing to help anyone himself

grit. grit my poor boy. what did they do to you.

"Why didn't people talk about that Advance Wars remake? I didn't even realize it came out!" Oh.

Sat at the bar next to a guy in his fifties saying he got "multiple Exceeds Expectations" in his last job review. I have not felt this desperately suicidal since I was a teenager

every fact i know about my body i've learned against my will. it's none of my business what goes on in there

you have been visited by BIG SHOULDERS ED repost and reply "HI BOB" or yuo will live forever getting trapped over and over on every celestial body in the solar system

the future ed baldwin was trying to secure

hey, michelle, what exactly do you mean by this

How can a dog be this small. How is that legal.

We vibin'

Nearly done with Succession and honestly I think their mom is 100% right about eyes. They're gross and unsettling

when i'm president, it will be a capital offense to say or wear any merch saying "I drink and I know things". no trial.

re: assassination attempts staged doesn't have to mean it's created from whole cloth. it can just as easily mean "we knew this was coming but let it through on purpose." see also: 9/11

lol. lmao.

anytime there's an interesting theme or metaphor in a video game i assume it's an accident

bureau. i can never ever spell that right the first time except for now, apparently

may the rockstar who has not crushed a plate of wings cast the first stone

edibles usually have no effect on me but hoo boy i might have underestimated these 10mg teas

This might be the funniest possible list

This is neither here nor there but how underwater is the president when the *New York Post* uses only flattering photos of a would-be assassin

A senior US official tells CBS news that Cole Tomas Allen, the suspect behind yesterday's shooting, posted "anti-British and anti-English rhetoric" on social media, and was part of a group called "Irish Zionism" and attended a "Free The Nipple" protest in Boston.

Straight chillin