I'm flying Swiss Air today, and their boarding muzak sounds a *lot* like the backing track to a 1970s porn film. So I'm told, anyway.

🎵🎶 Right about now, The...

I've just heard that Brendan Venter is going back to DoR at Saracens. I mean, as a Quins fan I loathe them on principle, but that's panto villain stuff. The guy's never met a game he couldn't ruin.

Police Escort in London 🦆🦆

Well, every day is a school day.

Watching the visually impaired Paralympic skiers attempt a slalom in a blizzard, which feels a little bit on the nose. It's terrifying just watching it.

See my last comment. It's a strange evening to be an Englishman in Ireland.

It turns out that watching France vs England in Ireland today is *brilliant*, because the Irish commentators are desperate for England to win but completely lack the vocabulary to say so. Wonderful.

Day 4 of the dreaded lurgy, offering the shakes, a consumptive rattle, and an inability to walk up the stairs without stopping for a rest. 🎵 It's starting to feel a lot like COVID🎶

"The Islamists oppose women getting an education," I mutter, as I aim my missile at the girls school

Well, this is *genius*. Cc @brettlempereur.bsky.social

Ladies! Don’t want to be perved at by weirdos wearing Meta Nonce Goggles? Simply wear one of my new range of stylish t-shirts emblazoned with a QR code that will send them to goatse.

This wheel is to the boy squirrel the way that the football is to Charlie Brown and it still makes me laugh every time he tries to use it only to be immediately spun.

Sir Ian McKellen performing a monologue from Shakespeare’s Sir Thomas More on the Stephen Colbert show. Never have I heard this monologue performed with such a keen sense of prescience. Nor have I ever been in this exact historical moment.TY Sir Ian, for reaching us once again. #Pinks #ProudBlue

Ian Austin, an Army veteran, was arrested for protesting ICE in Minneapolis. But he’s continued protesting. Senior reporter @julialurie.bsky.social spoke to him. “When they say, ‘Why would you be out here?’ How the fuck could I not be out here?” he says. “My nation is under attack."

The crossover we didn't know we needed. Genius. This has "Glastonbury guest slot" written all over it.

Hahahahaha

I found myself feeling all festive on my cycle home from work today, so naturally it immediately started hailing. Thanks, Galway.

Your annual festive reminder that Saint Nicholas bears an uncanny resemblance to Lieutenant Worf.

This is joyous.

Today in “Dudes Rock”: A dude playing Dire Straits’s “Sultans of Swing” guitar solo on…a recorder.

Oh, I *really* hope this is real.

Louvre Thieves Given Immunity After Confirming Jewels Stolen For Purpose Of Training AI Software https://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2025/10/20/louvre-thieves-given-immunity-after-confirming-jewels-stolen-for-purpose-of-training-ai-software/

It turns out this lad is quite good on stage, isn't he?

"Luke...on balance it's in my financial interest to reinstate being your father"

This is poetry.

The prospect of *actually getting paid* for some of my academic papers feels slightly alien. 🧪

Ozzy has checked out in the style you'd have hoped for, a couple of weeks after the kind of show that will appear in earthquake records and history books, and raised millions for charity. His conversation at the pearly gates should be likewise quite entertaining. Safe travels.

When does school restart, again?

The tents are packed and there's a frankly alarming volume of alcohol in the car: it must be #Glastonbury build day tomorrow!

Bags are packed for #SciComm nirvana at #Glastonbury festival next week. Swing by if you're amongst the lucky few - and come see me on the Laboratory stage at 1200 on Friday!

Truly, it's poetry.

Developing technology has taken me a number of strange places, but today I get to tick off a real #scicomm bucket-list item - I'm performing on-stage at #Glastonbury! Come and see "Can you hear me, Major Tom?" in Science Futures.🧪 www.glastonburyfestivals.co.uk/areas/the-gr...

Scientists Alarmed At Rising Sea Levels Blame Increased Number Of Submerged F/A 18 Fighter Jets

I'm all in for this. A good friend of mine recently died unexpectedly, and I'm considering taking him to Glastonbury anyway, El Cid-style.

A time-lapse of some images of asteroid (52246) Donaldjohanson during the encounter by Lucy! Images taken on April 20, 2025, from a distance of 1,600 to 1,100 km. Credit: NASA/Goddard/SwRI/Johns Hopkins APL science.nasa.gov/image-articl... #PlanetSci #SciComm 🧪

I'm rapidly remembering why it is I can't be arsed with playing Hideo Kojima games. Get to the bloody point already.

Okay, I'm in. Let's do this.

I have tariffed the penguins that are on Heard Island and which you were probably assuming did not export goods forgive me they were taking advantage of us so cunning and so cold

Note to self: next time I fly to the States, pack any space free in my suitcase full of eggs. I'll get a better exchange rate. Can't see a flaw in the logic.

Jesus, Sky Stream's playlist thing is completely unusable, isn't it? They spent all the money on the ad server, and none at all on the software integration. Didn't want to watch the rugby anyway...

@matteason.me I can confirm that form TF-230 worked flawlessly, and my cynical, streetwise 8-year-old son was utterly baffled by finding an envelope with his application form and a handful of coins in the letterbox this afternoon.

Here's a UK cultural export we can be genuinely proud of. [sniffs patriotic tears]

Let it begin.

In a world consumed by greedy people who only want to take, a very wholesome thing is @realdollyparton.bsky.social will send your kid a free book every month, no strings, no membership, no extra bs attached, just a nice present in the mail. iO loves this month’s book by @chriseliopoulos.bsky.social

🚨 Here it is! ✨️ This year’s line-up for the ever-amazing Field of Avalon at Glastonbury 2025! 🎉🎊

This whole thread is *marvellous*. Isn't maths great?

Today's animal distraction from The Horrors: The thing that drives beavers to build dams is a burning genetic hatred for the sound of running water.

Fame at last! Meta cared enough about my research to steal it! I'm *almost* flattered. #Meta #ThievingBastards