Can I go back to work yet?

Anybody want a dog? Or a family?

Look man I hear ya. Who doesn’t love a good nook? And crannies? Forget about it. Top tier. But honestly… nooks AND crannies together? Have a little shame. Have a little self respect.

Chrono Cross

I can’t wait to take the boy to see the new Mario movie. He’s gonna flip out.

My favorite kind of post is when someone takes a well established meme or idea, such as “cooking together isn’t romantic. You’re in my way” and presents it in a way that suggests it’s an original thought. Basically I hate Reddit is what I’m saying.

Good God I love Marathon.

Worn. A baby.

My wife’s home.

Baby as shoes.

Uh oh. Diarrhea.

Are there Wario64 style accounts but for toys specifically? My boys birthday is coming up!

You see these eggs? 20 eggs right here. Know what that means? 20 chickens. That's right. Count em right now if you want. You see? 20. Go fuck yourself.

Nice matters you got there... hope someone doesn't come along and make them worse (:<

I wish there was someone I could give money to for no reason. Oh well. Guess I just have to keep it. 😔

Crimson Desert is Two Worlds again.

The Z Fighters #godotengine

📜NEW GAME ALERT: DARK SCROLLS📜 Greetings from the Doinkhole. We are crawling out into the sun with a new game announcement. 🗺️ Embark on a heroic quest 🗡️ 9 unique heroes to choose 🪿 Goose honks at you at the shop ✨ ONLINE MULTIPLAYER Coming to PC and Nintendo Switch!

You ever accidentally write the plot for you game and it’s just Chrono Trigger? Then you rewrite it and it’s accidentally fucking Pathways Into Darkness? Happened to me.

*bewilderedly* Love doesn't just sit there, like a stone? *with growing ire* It has to be made, like bread?? *shaking with indignation* Remade all the time??? Made new?!

They should do a Sopranos audio book.

If I personally ever make a game that costs more than $30 you have my permission to do ONE stone cold stunner on me.

If I have to use my phone for anything, including calls or texts, it makes me want to throw up. I hate this thing. I can’t imaging trying to do internet stuff on it.

Dark Scrolls character introduction: GRIZZ! 🪓 Unleash the power of the mighty axe as you slash through your foes. Booty squash any remaining enemies on your quest to victory. 🍑 Coming to Nintendo Switch and PC very soon - wishlist now!

You know what you’re never going to miss before launch?

What is your most anticipated 'dungeon scroller' this year and why is it Dark Scrolls?

Do you guys eat your night time Doritos before or after dessert?

Your honor, my brother was playing. I had given the controller to him. The defendant only beat me because I wasn’t even playing and also the sun was in my eyes now that I think about it.

And over here is our manager of barketing! (Gestures to a dog in a suit) Sales are down 1000% it’s not good.

Shrek! Shrek!? *bullets whiz by* Where are you!? *explosions*

They might send me to jail for how I’m handling this pizza rn fr.

I swear to god the only reason I have a phone is so spam callers have something to do.

I think I love Marathon.

Getting real tired of having to fill up my wife’s water cup all the time. They should just sell Stanley cups full of ice cold water and I’ll buy em by the case at Costco.

Announcing DARK SCROLLS from @doinksoft.bsky.social - an auto-scrolling action-platformer for one or two players, locally and online! 💥 Unique runs every time 🏹 Wildly different heroes 🥞 Stackable perk system 🪿 An irritable goose shopkeeper Coming to Nintendo Switch and PC pretty dang soon!

Please. Bring my man @unormal.bsky.social home.

What did they call reverse psychology before psychology was invented? Probably something like The Swindlers Gambit.

Okay how many car crashes is Tony Soprano going to get into? It’s like every 3 episodes he’s bouncing his head off the steering wheel.

You know what? I’m just gonna say it. Not enough sandwiches have pepperoni on them.

Whatever happened to two mean dobermans that you can distract with a pack of hotdogs? Shame.

New Doinksoft announcement tomorrow.

I hate almost everything that I see and I just wanna disappear.

It was 67 degrees this morning.

I just need enough money to make a dying earth first person dungeon crawler. So like… several million dollars.

I said forget about it cuh.

Building a little grotto-like area for Squirtle, Wartortle, and Blastoise. This level design shit is so hard. Bless the LDs out there. You’re heroes. Second only to UI/UX folks.

Making placeholder explosions that look good is impossible.

I’m having a lot of fun with Marathon but I couldn’t tell you a single thing about it. Don’t ask me where to find something in a menu. Don’t ask me what any of the items or guns do. I don’t know.

Now hold on. You're telling me we have not only running... but also gunning!? Unbelievable.

Every time I turn around it’s AI again. Stop.