I have a video game that mispronounces "Aloysius." Yes, I know it's awful. But you forever sound like a moron when someone plays the game. I even tried to let him leave his mortal coil and they still said it all the time. I love the mouth feel of this name

Come watch my cute friend

This is how we celebrate Gay Wrath Month, bitches.

Slightly increase a band The Rolling Sttwos

Never too many balls in a room

Remember he's seated because he can't stand. Look at that lean, the desk is holding him upright.

I found two cartridges this morning in my closet. I remember losing them, but assumed I threw them away. No, I "hid" them under some towels for some dumbass reason

Surely they've suffered enough?

More for you all!

If I did this, I'd have to get Mort his own spatulas

Don't eat rat shit

He really is running the country like one of his businesses Can he bankrupt us? What happens if he does?

Just saw a couple of classy drug deals Much cleaner than I expected

It's unreal because I haven't talked to that branch of my family in 8 years. Before then I had carried my grandparents alone for over a decade. But... She introduced me to To Wong Foo, The Birdcage, Elvira. Also, I couldn't tell her either...

This reminds me: new season of RuPaul's Drag Race, All Stars is supposed to begin soon.

Whelp, I'm time dilated Must be the mass of my huge head. I thought it was 4:30ish. It's not here.

Why build a Deathstar when you can strap a hyperdrive onto an asteroid and launch it into a planet? You don't even need to be close to the planet

Called my mom, found out my aunt died yesterday. 55. We were very close for a very long time. There's going to be a memorial later. Her mother died just 10 years ago.

Curiosity led me to claiming a Lilith statue in Skovos. It's weird to have accidentally done something so cool and affects other players. No one else can claim it.

Everything has to be a sandwich of some sort right now. I don't want nuthin' Unless it's on a bun, hun'

Picture this: a toasted everything bagel with garlic aoli, eggs, sausage, and "cheese." It was delicious and I'm prepped to make 3 more.

Shit, I'm bumping into 40KSky now... There's an algorithm

I'm laughing at my own jokes

Happy Mother's Day to this absolute Queen

Mother's Day is weird for me because I was decanted. Do I send a card to the tub?

I should've been recording That was a beautiful self-orgasm

The sheer joy of being 3 hours later in the day than the family.

I'll accept these

Captions for still images Frankly, just do it for folks. You don't need a reason as long as someone else has one. Quit being selfish and lazy

White guys with no rhythm (all of us, yes, you too) can we stop with the swaying back and forth while pumping our arm? Trump does it and looks like an idiot and you look like him...

Kash Patel won't quit until he finds those female bodies he's supposed to inspect

I'm glad they made Mephisto and Lilith actually look related

Let's add that all politicians cannot trade on the stock market. Period.

I get so many moving and storage ads and I can't stand it. It's like, "REMEMBER WHERE YOU WORK!"

Lots of racist behavior from the "there is no racism anymore" crowd. Lines redrawn the moment they could. "It's not because of their race" when the part stopping racists goes away. I'm so absolutely furious

There is no cow level

Forget aging like fine wine, I'm aging like good bourbon

Religious OCD... There's a term?

Would you believe that people told me I'd look ridiculous with long hair?

If you can't make good choices, make good memories

Imagine shooting yourself in the foot with a phaser set to vaporize. One of the weird TNG ones obviously. Is that why uniformes didn't have pockets? Ship keys accidentally shooting off feet?

Alarm panel tones matching my tinnitus. They got the panel shut off after an hour, but the tinnitus is a fucking roar and my head hurts.

Drop into our @bearunion.bsky.social party tonight and rub up against some of Seattle's hottest beefcakes. LIVE music by DJ Dana Dub starts at 10pm!

My ass ain't been ate since Philip I feeling very versy

I once defended myself by saying, "I don't even hug my mom everytime I see her!"* I think now that it's actually part of the problem. *some christians are REALLY weird