Lou Diamond Phillips in the Chair Company

Want to feel old? If Bob Seger wrote Old Time Rock and Roll today, it would be about Hoobastank. Also, he’d probably spell his name “13ob 5eger” and no one would know if you’re supposed to pronounce it “Bob” or “thirteen ob”

Thinking about Aric’s blast rooms tweet again

Just got Taco Bell and they said the Baja Blast machine was broken. All the time I thought I was the Baja Blast Machine. Much to consider

This is how Baja Blast is made

This Christmas, head on down to Taco Bell, where you will be visited by 3 spirits: the ghost of Christmas Blast (Baja), the ghost of Live Más Present, and the ghost of Christmas Yet to Crunch

(Voice that sounds like someone scooting in a heavy chair without lifting it up) we need to go back to the time of mommy milkers

Hey Grok, how many beers is safe to drink before climbing in the roof to hang Christmas lights?

There are too many Jeffs. We should change half of em to Garys. We’re kind of low on Garys.

ME: they shouldn't be able to say 'your order has shipped' when they've just created a label. That's not shipped. ISAAC CHOTINER: so, you've never claimed to have a task underway when you've merely opened the file? ME: that's not- CHOTINER: in this Teams message to your boss, you said-

putrid person. never been even marginally inconvenienced in his life and so full of bile. so destructive. so stupid and incurious and certain. just an absolute cancer of a man

We’re all focused on what Quentin said about Paul Dano but has anyone noticed that he thinks Toy Story 3 is the 2nd best movie of the 21st century??

A lot of people think homes should have front doors. What this blueprint supposes is, what if they don’t?

Blood City, P.D. had one of the best ensemble casts in TV history

When there was only 1 set of footprints in the sand? That was before I followed you back.

Nobody does "booty had me like" posts anymore. And I think that's really sad.

One time, it was a Beagle and I temporarily named him Root Beer

They should call it Supperware because I put my supper in there

i’m not sure how but this is real antipolygraph.org/blog/2025/10...

It’s because they’ve never had mine

“These are the brakes.” - Kurtis Blow teaching someone how to drive

Biggs, California Pop: 1,879 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biggs,_California Images: https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=141362707 https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=141352495 https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=141352470

the universe may be dying. entropy will probably win. but I exist at the same point in space time as cool ranch doritos. I wonder what other snacks I’ll get to eat

This is why we should have never put the Coast Guard in charge of classifying hate symbols.

I’m going to listen to the Nuzzi song but from the perspective of a person who also made music of extremely low quality when I was that age (and now too!)

Thinking about becoming one of those guys you were just kind of acquaintances with from 2005-2009 but you ended up friends on Facebook and he posts 12 to 15 incoherent political takes a day.

Here’s the twist: he’s got the new Charmin Forever Roll stuck to his shoe.

OPERATION EIGHTEEN NAKED COWBOYS IN THE SHOWERS AT RAM RANCH

Asking my wife for the big toilet paper roll for Christmas

Let’s hear it for the toads!

have them ask my houseman about donad

I started taking piano lessons yesterday. Once I learn a scale other than C major / A minor, it’s over for you bitches

I prefer to get my data from the Taco Bell State of Local Commerce report, which states that Americans are living more más than ever before.

Me when I drop a pick in my acoustic guitar

I’m going to get a turkey and cheddar on schiacciata from Spiteri’s to celebrate.

Ross wrote this article after mommy forgot to put a cookie in his lunch box

Cool photo I took a few seconds after waking up when Joe Camel hit me with his car

This is pretty good, Rudy, but you should have gone with this format instead. Put an x over each tower and say “Now Orlando is my best friend”

agora só falta deletar mais umas 10 músicas e o álbum vai ser perfeito

Lost in some of the bigger election news last night: Dick Swaab has won the Sewer District

Hahaha suck shit LaMalfa

I’m in an oral surgeon waiting room right now and I’ve heard both Friends in Low Places and Rosanna. Shit is popping off in this mix. Hell yeah

We took our dog to upper park today and within minutes he had a fishhook stuck into the side of his toe. The emergency vet had no availability so we took him home, pushed the hook through his pad so we could snip the barb off and pull the hook out. It took so long to do and sucked so hard

Modelo should sell 8 oz cans for people who just want a few small beers

Congratulations to some guy in NY. I regret to inform the rest of you that you’ve snoozed and losed.

Thanks to the soundtrack to the latest TMNT movie, my five year old son has really gotten into M.O.P.’s Ante Up and DMX’s Party Up. I think he might be ready to try beer

I’m still cracking up the Musk thinks it’s remarkable that he sleeps 6-8 hours a night