New word alert: sherlocked. Meaning: to adhere to a boundary that maintains your autonomy and mental health. Revisions to definition accepted

This strikes me as pretty bad

I know there's dirt in the Epstein files, but I didnt think there was government-shutdown-invade-2-US-cities-bomb-venezuelan-boats-refuse-swearing-in-duly-elected-rep level dirt in there.

We have a Rebel Resistance flag by our Ukrainian flag, both flying off our front porch.

Where were you when you understood the lyrics "his love was the key to open my thighs?" Me: driving my kids to school at 6:45 am 🤣🤣

So, Trump's not been seen in public since the military debacle?

So, I think we were all correct when "You didn't measure up/In any measure of a man" was indeed about Matt's weeping willow because Taylor Swift prefers, ummm, a redwood.

Y'all. A national strike. Let's be France.

No update on the dudes punking/harassing me except I've lost 5 lbs since Saturday and I can't sleep. I posted an academic analysis of this whole situation on Tiktok, b/c I'm a professor and this whole situation supports my first theory on online communication and community. Still deciding next steps

The good thing about capitalism is that we know money has power and we are DELIGHTED to use it. I don't think the powers that be understand that we **want** to use our money to enact our morals. That wasn't included in their Capitalistic Oligarch Manual.

Ready for class today!

A very big Onion announcement: The Onion has spent the last two months working on a masterpiece. It's a documentary titled Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile. It's so good, in fact, we were set to release it in theatres nationwide on October 2nd. Then two weeks ago, Charlie Kirk was shot.

More than 1800 detainees are missing after the closure of Alligator Alcatraz. Their families and lawyers can’t find them and they’ve vanished from the ICE database. Feels like this should be a much bigger story www.miamiherald.com/news/local/i...

Well, I'm still here. Have you been left behind, too?

Few things are worse than having a kitten cuddle on your lap and you go to pet it and it runs away. Repeatedly.

What happened to Jackie and Carlos Merlos and their young children is outrageous. We need urgent action to help reunite this family: act.nilc.org/page/88106/p... 🧵Read about their story and the extraordinarily cruel lengths that CBP and ICE went to disappear them⤵️

It's a lot, y'all. All of this is a lot.

The leaders of North Carolina's state legislature are months late now in coming up with a budget for our state government - and they're not even actively working on it anymore. This is a big, flashing sign of incompetent and corrupt governance - and it has one fundamental root cause.

TFW you are so into volleyball, you and hubs scream "OMG WHAT A DIRTY DUMP!!!!" at US vs. Slovenia

Just like Jesus said.

Stephen Miller went to Duke. I've said it for years, but truly, as a Tar Heel, I will say it again: I hate Duke like I hate the Nazis.

Shouting up at the large bird that landed on a tree limb above us: PEOPLE ARE CALLING YOU AN OWL!! ((You need a middle schooler for this humor))

One stark marker of how much our society has devolved in just a few years is Bob Iger personally got on a call to convince us to let Disney/HULU make the 1619 Project. That America no longer exists.

Hey, little buddy!

She is not welcome to join the We Do Not Care Club.

Cowards. Cowards all. Also the blonde bitch who is getting off on beating on the unarmed lady is the poster child for what Trump, Noem, & Hegseth call a great patriot with the warrior ethos. This is fascism. We are a failed state

📌WARNING: As a former managing editor of Stars and Stripes, what Hegseth's Pentagon is pulling with the press is dangerous as hell, anti-American, and will HURT THE TROOPS. 📌Any news organization that advocates for THEM and reports on their quality-of-life issues will potentially be squashed. 🧵

Me: So, are people doing substances at these concerts? Son: Yeah, but not my friends. Hubs (joking): Yeah, your friends are too high on ecstasy. Son: Is that the Catholic thing? Me:......... Hubs:........ Son: You know, like when you don't have sex before marriage. Hubs: CHASTITY!

Just now, 11 state and city lawmakers were arrested by DHS police on the 10th floor of 26 Federal Plaza after a hour of demanding access to the ICE lock up on the same floor. @thecity.nyc

It's really hard to sleep right now. My Garmin gives me a failing grade most nights.

Becoming increasingly clear we’re gonna have to build a parallel infrastructure for all the media we really love. The reason all of this is happening under the color of law is hyperconsolidation, dissent being traded straight up for merger approval, or fear of harassment.

You know. This has not been a great week. Two weeks? Two months? Year? I want to live in precedented times. I want a tan suit to be a scandal again and I want to lose my shite defending it.

Every American needs to watch this segment and keep themselves updated regarding this unprecedented authoritarian power grab.

Trump is a weak and failing president, part 973

Someone shot up my kid's school today, and our governor is paying tribute to a guy who thought that is an acceptable price to pay for having the Second Amendment. Jared Polis has failed Colorado.

One day after the Supreme Court lifted the ban on racial profiling, federal agents swarmed a car in Van Nuys. Four masked agents with guns drawn yanked people out, slammed them to the ground, and pointed a weapon at a pregnant woman. There is no justification for this. None.

Oliver North married Fawn Hall two weeks ago. If you know who either of these people, you are old AF.

The attack on Charlie Kirk is disgusting, vile, and reprehensible. In the United States of America, we must reject political violence in EVERY form.

Y'all. It doesn't happen a lot, but here I am experiencing free floating happiness. Courses are going well. Projects up and running. And working on a manuscript I am *thrilled* about. It's a level of peace and contentment about my chosen profession that isn't always possible. #academia

Y'all. We need a community topic. Like why is Trump two hours late to his proclamation party?

We are at the end of the beginning of an authoritarian government.

Was telling the hubs that history books are going to say Chicago was the starting point of the Civil War, and that was before Trump's explicit threat. yay.

Salt melts ICE

I'm a border collie with orange cat energy. And I'm not sorry.

Our pool is saltwater. I swear, every time I dive in, I think "WOW! I have been sweating!!"

My father was part of the drug interdiction team in the Navy. He told me lots of stories from those times, and none of them involved blowing up civilians. This is an outrageous abuse by people who just want to feel powerful. abcnews.go.com/Politics/whi...

Morning me ambitiously puts the basket of clean clothes on the bed as a reminder. Evening me fishes out some pjs and puts the baskets back on the floor. This is the way.

The flyovers during the press conference are a toddler's tantrum. They are loud, but they don't change anything.

I'm a Tarheel born I'm a Tarherl bred And when I die I'll be a Tarheel Who still does not like Bill Belichick

Trump is making an announcement at 2 pm Tuesday. What is he going to announce? Wrong answers only.