I later found out that this is specifically how a Redditor tells you to kill yourself

I hijacked a bulldozer, tried to run over a car with it, caused an explosion that blew my legs off, found a frog hat and a kazoo, hopped back to the retirement home, and played a solo. 16/10 game.

Just got an email stating I got myself on the merit list for my 3.0 GPA. Gee, guys, way to make me feel bad about the massive pile of assignments I have left overdue due to a burnout

i guess those celebrating soras death didnt get the memo that some of us need daily personalized greetings from james bond—for mental health

"This is all Putin's plan!" Hey, maybe the US is just a horrible imperialistic country without Putin's help? Maybe our elected officials are just that short-sighted and unabashedly corrupt on their own? Maybe Trump is just stupid enough to bomb a critical point of the economy without Putin's help?

Like I said, in one short-sighted, dumbass move, Trump has done damage to the global economy that even Bush could only dream of. While the exact same people who lobbied to get him back in office in the first place could only watch in horror.

Open AI might take out the entire US economy with it but I think I'll accept a life roaming the apocalyptic wasteland just for the Sam Altman downfall arc

Thank fucking Christ.

After several audio corruptions, it's finally done.

The normalcy bias in this fucking country is just unbelievable. You can watch people get murdered, witness the constitution getting shredded by the day, hear the tech fascists say, in no uncertain terms, what kind of dystopian hellscape they’re working to create, and be like, oh, I’m sure it’s fine.

I cannot even begin to describe the full extent of how much Jesus would despise the entire MAGA movement lmfao

We’ve told all the casting agents that the Weird Al biopic sequel is currently on hold, but they just keep sending in headshots.

This is literally the only thing i have the bandwidth to read about today

This episode was great, now it's worse #TheAmazingDigitalCircus #tadc #ytp

And done. I just told them upfront to piss off with this plan

Gas station Jesus

this is stupit

I didn’t hit rock bottom. I gently settled into it like a beanbag chair

I feel bad for that one kid at the very beginning of Fallout. Like, imagine nuclear MAD is finally launched on your freaking birthday.

Reddit, the website that just a year ago drove the owner of a fox rescue to kill herself, wants to start collecting the personal IDs of its users. Yeah I'm sure that will work out totally fine

There's something about final comic strips that really captivates me

I know it's still really, really bad for us, but it's so fucking funny how Trump has singlehandedly fucked EVERYTHING up for the Republicans who fought so hard to get him back in office in the first place and all Republicans can do is mewl platitudes in the hopes that we don't skin them alive

Disney is saddened at the passing of Carlos Ray Norris. "Chuck" appeared in an endless barrage of VHS-era garbage before finding a second life as the embodiment of your cousins awful, awful, awful sense of humor, and will be most fondly remembered for doing a thumbs up at a dodgeball tournament.

The idea that the man who irreparably poisoned the entire creative industry went to an event celebrating said creative industry and expected to NOT get bullied by the creatives whose lives he made significantly worse is amazing

This is how I hear that Chuck Norris died, and it seems like the only appropriate way to hear about it.

Okay, but have you considered that we successfully owned the libs? Because, apparently, [gestures arms] ALL OF THIS was worth a few crying libs. Why have enough food to eat when we can drink liberal tears?

Seeing this headline *immediately* after scrolling through yet another thread screeching about how people are done voting for Democrats really is a treat

it’s incredibly blackpilling to me that it takes rising gas prices and rising gas prices alone to have people turn against the war in iran, and not the american government murdering thousands of children and civilians in iran. americans are incredibly selfish

"I should really stop making accounts of websites I never use," says me, as I confirm my email address for NeoCities

I thought she looked pretty in lipstick ngl kemdkekkd

The relatable parts of this story are: a) releasing a game on Steam b) crying

see? here's the thing. A lot of people are like, the earth is fucked, it's beyond salvation, it's hit the tipping point, but time and time again we see that if we just fucking fixed the problem, it rebounds so incredibly fast. Imagine what could be done if people actually cared

Fuck AIPAC, good morning to everyone else

I’m ashamed to say I haven’t been following many primaries outside of NY this cycle, but a professor who had an affair with a student being the Democratic nominee in Illinois’s 9th CD sure does nothing to dispel the notion that both parties are run largely by predators who abuse what power they get

When I want to chill on the couch and then my mom sits next to me and starts watching some guy explaining how blackface should be made okay again

Space Dandy is a really fun watch...when you're NOT sitting between annoying people who keep asking how Dandy came back from throwing himself into the far future at the end of episode 7, why his nemesis is a gorilla man, and other shit that DOESN'T NEED AN EXPLANATION in an EPISODIC COMEDY ANIME

The game industry’s obsession with graphics is so funny because every other year there will be some breakout hit called “Stick Figure Mansion” or some shit that outsells 90% of the market and runs on a toaster

welp at least i know i can draw these two even when i have art block #tanglethelemur #whisperthewolf #whispangle #sonicfanart #idwsonic #sonicart

I am going to become the joker. We've been screaming from the rooftops that this was never about sports or trans youth healthcare. Instead, we were ignored and browbeaten by a bunch of idiot centrists who took the concerns of people who want us eliminated in good faith. archive.ph/xgwCd

Calling out from FlatZone! Calling out from Game & Watch world!

its not my wallet

No money for healthcare, food, fixing roads/bridges, education, and now the post office. But plenty of money to bomb Iran, Ecuador, Venezuela, Syria, Yemen, and Somalia. AMERICA FIRST! THIS IS WINNING!!!!

Someone in PA caught the Cleveland meteor on his dashcam driving towards NE Ohio. Source: x.com/hankf330togo...

Columbo ass headline

Hey, Sickos. Take a knee. My knee. Please! It's-a me. Yer Ella. I got Dragon Leg Screwed by a Lime Scooter then worked on it for a week then slipped on Ice (FUCK ICE) and kept working for a 17 Hour Day and then Quit the Chicken Mine about it because no worker should have to work injured. Send Tips

Apparently @kebrightbill.bsky.social thinks AuDHD folks like myself are "technoluddite ableists" because we think that using your disability to justify using a technology which is causing death and disability to marginalised people is fucking terrible. FYI: The Luddites were the good guys.

Boy. I LOVE TRYING TO WATCH YOUTUBE BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE WHO WON'T SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP.