Playing Dire Straits and MGMT as in-arena hype music. Announcers making a Kawhi joke saying Cooper Flagg should steal his nickname so they can call him the White Claw. The Dallas Mavericks should not be allowed to retain their franchise...

Holy shit this whole...just...but...well...goddamnit

Really hoping I can figure out why MLB.tv keeps locking me out in the next few days...

Cheers to someone who acted exactly as I would have if I had the fortitude to brave a campaign trail, which is largely saying "fuck" on as many podcasts as would've had me.

I recognize Venezuela, not the Dodgers, as the World Champions.

clayton kershaw's last act on a baseball field was to get a silver medal with a rainbow ribbon draped around his neck

men showing genuine affection for each other, celebrating something they did together, as a collective. let this be a model for masculinity, not the fake hardo military bullshit

Need an @defector.com investigation into whether these silver medals were strictly a US contingency that would've been quietly been circular filed if the redassed diaper baby boys ended up winning...

Are these silver medals a new thing to pacify the redassed diaper baby boys, like the Trump FIFA trophy? Who awards 2 places - shouldn't it either be a one-prize tourney or there should've been a semi losers game to award bronze???

Sports on CBS: stay tuned for a new episode of Young Sheldon Sports on NBC: we still have Dateline Sports on ABC: buy Disney+. do it. do it this instant if you ever want to watch anything else ever again Sports on FOX: here’s a Bible movie starring nothing but white people

I don't know about you, but for ME?!?! I love to see guys hit a forever-memorable home run and then celebrate by looking like they are absolutely furious and annoyed that such a good thing just happened. It fits into the one allowed emotion (anger) that we men are allowed to have.

*heavy booing*

Reduce the civilian speed limit to 5 and it's not going to make my neighborhood any safer from the cops that routinely blast through at 40-50 blowing stop signs and driving straight over roundabouts...

I'll tell you what I do if I'm up there against Mason Miller is just foul off all those 102mph fastballs until I see a pitch more to my liking.

Bummer when the only way for a good thing to happen to a sports team I like this weekend would be the closer for my regular baseball team shitting the bed...

Would you feel more grateful to someone who murdered hundreds of schoolgirls on your behalf, or to the person who unclogged your toilet on a Sunday night?

Had I unlimited money I would run teevee ads to the effect that military service sucks, no one really respects like a low-level enlisted grunt, and aimless kids seeking a life path and fulfillment should just learn a trade and join a union.

If I were an athlete I would not want a nickname like 'lobo cop' or anything else suggesting I primarily exist as a tool of a fascist state

Absolutely hilarious if Italia knocks US out of pool play based on run differential...

Pro tip:if you're in California and get one of those bullshit petitions circulated by rich assholes trying to avoid a wealth tax,they'll pay you to mail them anything!I'm sending: the petition (signed Fuck You),some rusty springs,gloves coated in motor oil,the rest of my junk mail,and some cheese...

Proposal: swap the West Sacramento A's for Team Australia and see if anyone notices (also start telling people Obama is doing color commentary for the WBC and see how many people believe it)

Being told there's shit going down with a boat named for Gerald Ford and refusing to believe any of what I'm hearing because it's just too goddamn on the fucking nose

We traded him for Mike Clevinger.

Two things I would never have imagined saying 20 years ago... 1. I am proud to say that I am officially a plumber. 2. Sitting for the state plumbing exam is considerably harder than the ones to become a real estate broker, federal mortgage lender, notary public, or general contractor...

Bad tropes applicable to my biological parents I find amusing but discovered far too late in life... A few years ago: often wrong, but never uncertain. A few hours ago: ever-present, rarely pleasant.

Ate Pizza Hut for the first time in a few years tonight - who the fuck wants their rubbery pizza crust to taste like a Twinkie?

Since I have nothing useful to contribute to *waves hands wildly in despair at the world in general* I'm going to share a fun work project. My team got hired to convert a small bedroom into a bath/walk-in closet, and convert the old bedroom closet into a front hall closet...

I cannot stress this enough

Biannual reminder from Rondog that if you blow up fireworks in a residential neighborhood where your neighbors have pets, you're a fucking asshole.

Come home from the In-laws and somehow my jug of Costco peanut butter pretzels has migrated, unscathed, to the stair landing where Rondog goes to enjoy his treats...

It's not a holiday until some stranger invited to the table shares a take as horrendous as "I like cheese, mayonnaise, and onions on my hot dogs."

Damn in retrospect all Mamdani had to do to get Schumer to endorse him was say he'll schedule a vote on becoming a centrist corporate shill at some point in the future

Dogers only rule: if you want to issue an intentional BB, it should be done via intentional HBP

Hell yeah Bleak Snell

The day after my 50th birthday I am going to start prefacing every opinion I voice with "As someone with the better part of a century's experience on this topic..."

Go Jays. Padres bring home Thicky Henderson. That is all.

So the "leader of the free world" is posting fake videos of himself that imply he literally shits on his constituents. Cool!

I am vehemently against government intervention in private markets (/s), but something must be done about the scourge of these "Dodgers" upon decent people across the land

Blockety block block BLOCK!!!

My dog looks at every half-finished dinner plate with eyes like I have for the Padres in spring training. Hope springs eternal...but there will be no treats tonight.

My sister is at a wedding and this is the dress code...I am thoroughly flabbergasted.

One last postseason diaper blowout for Clayton Kershaw. A beautiful sendoff for a legend.

I assume Clayton Kershaw is being punished by God because he again didn't do something heterosexually enough. That's on him.

Stop letting football announcers and football fans call baseball games. TIA.

Hey, it's Wandy! I guess we might as well get a head start on the moping versus waiting a few innings pretending an offense will sprout from magic beans or something...

best family trip since january 6th

Holding out hope, but this is probably going from "in cart" to "rush delivery scheduled" sometime around 2:30 tomorrow afternoon...

Wow, who'd a thunk it would have been useful to score those guys stranded at 3rd with 0 or 1 outs?

I just tried doing this (with “Yakety Sax”), but can’t figure out how to upload it so the sound works.

Almost tempted to switch to the AZ broadcast because I watched a bit of their booth during their Dogers series and (while I was obviously pulling for them) their guys are some of the pettiest whiners ever...