I live in America, I am at high risk.

These people are the worst people.

ynab is so bad now and it makes me sad because we have loved and used it for so long.

It's the last day of the month and we can't log in to our bank and all our company does is send money, this is going to be such a great day, send pizza.

Sent an email to a few coworkers asking for their postcard junk mail and when I explained to my boss that it was for a sewing project in which I need a zillion paper hexagons to cover in fabric and sew, he said, "Why are you doing this to yourself? Do you like suffering?"

The only answer for me is the peanut butter heaven candy from Disneyland. It's been gone probably ten years and I still complain about it being gone every time we are there. I will continue to complain because it was the best thing on this godforsaken planet. GET WITH THE PROGRAM DISNEYLAND

I've had Say No More Mon Amour stuck in my head all morning which is weird because Rex Manning day was like two weeks ago?

I ordered a sewing cabinet then instantly cancelled it to get a better one. Better one arrived, Todd put it together, it's great and I love it. Then the first one (confirmed to be cancelled) arrived at our home and the company seems to have no urgency in getting it back. The one I didn't pay for.

Having to give additional taxes to the IRS today feels like such an insult to injury at this point.

This explain’s Gayle’s face after they got back.

My mother just called me, absolutely panicked. "DID YOU FEEL IT?!?!" "Yes." "I DIDN'T FEEL ANYTHING!!!!!" "Then why are you panicking?" "I don't know, I was outside and this alert came on my phone and I thought someone died or stole a child or something." At least I come by it naturally.

A pig in a tiny cowboy hat is probably the best thing you will see in your life.

I'm obsessed with the guy who works at the costco car wash because his name is TANK. Every time I go there I want to just ask him what is life like when your name is TANK.

We need Ted Rack more than ever right now.

wait you can do that

When I checked out one of the offending staff was not pleasant so I acted as useless as possible asking the nurse to confirm everything repeatedly and double-check my meds and schedule and then this morning I called and did it again. She was not happy. I might do it again tomorrow, I don't know.

Yesterday while a doctor was cutting nefarious cells out of my lip, the nurse said, "You know, we gotta do something about the disrespect." I immediately panicked because I was assertive in my demand that the doctor fix it then and there rather than sending something to a lab.

*Nandor voice* THIS FUCKING GUY

I saw a video of Amanda Seyfried singing California and thought OH I WANT TO LISTEN TO JONI MITCHELL BUT IT WILL MAKE ME SO EMOTIONAL AT WORK, I SHOULDN'T and then I did anyway and like forty seconds into Both Sides Now I'm sobbing at my desk. TGIF.

I will do everything in my power to make sure this guy is never elected again. Here’s a form where you can tell him you will do the same. www.gov.ca.gov

The people in front of us at Disneyland are complaining about having to wait in line to get in and I don’t want to be the one to tell them this is going to be 70% of their day.

Gene Hackman was a great actor, but his best on-screen performance was when he happened to be at his local diner when Guy Fieri and DDD showed up and Hackman was like “Yeah we love this place and also WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR.”

Chunky Soup Cruz gettin cooler by the minute

Also I was at CVS to stare overwhelmed at hair styling products because I want to look cute at a wedding on Saturday and I wish someone would just say BUY THIS because I have no idea what I'm doing? Someone come make me look like this:

Watched an old guy lose his shit at CVS and every time he got angry that he kept getting prompts on the POS, the employee was like "You clicked yes to get more information" and the guy screamed at him about propaganda while his wife stared on, then he stormed out and yelled all the way to his car.

Happy anniversary of the day the monorail went over my wedding, featuring @toddjohnson.boats

On a related note, am I about to sign up for a knitted chicken class?

Does the pattern come with the yarn because WILL BUY.

I hope America is as lucky as the delta jet - everyone survives but the right wing explodes

Everything is terrible, but this is pretty great.

I’m a point and laugh gal myself, but this is also effective.

Saw '227k' in an email and today is the day I learned I still know every word to the 227 theme song.

Cool to live in a time where a guy who eats roadkill by choice is making health decisions for America.

Today #1 boss told me, "You know what, Andria, you know a lot more than people give you credit for." Feeling PRETTY GOOD.

SUPPORT THE TROOPS

“With Or Without You” just came on at my sewing class and every woman over fifty went to A Place.

YO @gavinnewsom.bsky.social

Would love Governor Hair Gel to do the same.

Did I Take My ADHD Med Or Not is my least favorite Andria’s Wonky Brain game.

Walked by a crusty old dude standing on the street drinking a tall can and ABSOLUTELY EXPERIENCING I'm Like A Bird by Nelly Furtado.

This morning I was talking to a nurse and she called me babe and that felt a little casual from someone who was instructing me on peeing in a cup.

Last night I dreamed I was on a date with John Taylor (who I've had a crush on since 1983) and after he met my family he was like, "You seem cool, but NO." My family ruins everything.

Absolutely correct.

I don't know what anyone on here is talking about today, and I'm fine with that.

Today I met a big fluffy boy named RUBEN. The moment I walked out of Trader Joe's we locked eyes and I looked at his guy and said, "I think I need to pet your dog. Can I pet your dog?" And he was like, "Yeah, sure." I petted the dog but we didn't make any conversation so it got weird and I left.

Well, CAT. RIP Ike.

I could not ask for a better and more loving father for my children. (Cats.)

I have long been convinced that the solution to 90% of traffic fatalities and at least 50% of the climate crisis is for men to go to therapy