Hold me closer tiny chudler

For sale: baby, exploded

Really glad I didn't kill myself that time, otherwise I would've missed out on uh

Non-bread

You should be able to order euthanasia on doordash

Terrible new hero named The Chuddler

im only liking this because you said chudler, i hate everything you post

I'm getting hit by a car

I write zyns not tragedies

Having a gay old time (derogatory)

I'm so proud of Tom Meyers for not playing the Riyadh Comedy Festival

I want to scrape the opening of my can against my eyeball

Abbie come back

Almost hanged myself with a belt on a doorknob in the hotel room I checked in to so I wouldn't be stopped midway and end up a vegetable but then I realized I would miss out on all the new Media Products that are coming out Q4 2025 "Yippeeee!!!"

Frick my stupid chungus life

I'm bready to die

I love my awful ex-fiancee and I'm not ashamed to say it out loud

Dissolving into a red paste, if you even care

Canadian mathlete team called the Edmonton Euler's

I really like that my dad killed himself

guys will be like "these people are ruining america" and it'll be a picture of the coolest guys ever

I only started doing heroin to support the mujahideen

Peepee is short for playin an peein

Peepee is short for peein an playin

Tomorrow I'm planning on losing a knife fight with an electric scooter lady at Sam's Club

Why subway store smell Nice but is Bad, but subway station smell Bad but is Nice

I would never say this on ketamine

Fire at the Olive Garden started by local Israeli tourist. "I didn't know it was a restaurant!"

If a rule brought you here, what great use of the rule, dude! 😁

This Baja Blast is going to cure me

What sucks to me about any particular given substance is when it's got moments of the old Feelings of Impending Doom

Libbin it up at the Hotel California

Let’s Prudently Advance Hank Hill Thought

Salad dressing

Im I'm gonna flip out

Reading is magical

Eyes Wide Shut Goon Cave

I'm gonna say the F word

I'm your boyfriend

It only took five concurrent psychiatric medications but I can finally smoke weed without getting scared

My beautiful child, Derpina, has fallen gravely ill

Have to find yet another therapist because they keep falling in love with me!

Balls enlargement surgery

Forgetting to take my Flintstones vitamin and getting the brain zaps

We need a Left answer to Peppa Pig

Move over Bin Laden, this year I'm flying some "New York Jets" to the mother effing Superbowl!

War would be hell for me personally, as an introvert

Milwaukee falls in bloodless coup, military junta government takes power. "Holy crap" says locals