I can’t put into words how incredibly grateful I am to everyone that has shown their love and support. I couldnt do this without all of you. I’m getting the help I need and I’m taking care of myself. I won’t let Charlie’s light disappear and I won’t let all of your dedication and love go to waste.

I still feel you around me every day. I just wish I could hold you. To play video games together like we use to everyday. I miss getting back scratches and forehead kisses. I miss you so much.

I will have an update on job things as well Thank you for those that have reached out to me here and everywhere else. Thank you for your love and support. Thank you for helping Ben and coming together as a community And thank you for helping me fly to California soon and cover this months rent

I still have yet to get with everyone here and telegram, I apologize. I am back to work, STILL trying to recover from whatever flu/sinus thing I had My online class also started, as well as my Saturday class I am in the depression and angry stage and I can barely think straight

AnthroExpo is helping us set up a spot for Charlie at their memorial table — if you are attending the con and want a space to leave a note or doodle for this incredible dog, you will be able to. Thank you to everyone who has created art for this thus far 😭💖

ART UPDATE🖊️✨ Happy Monday yall! It’s been quite a week here— thanks to everyone that reached out. I appreciate the kindness. 🧡 I saw everyone’s messages even if I haven’t gotten back to them all. And thank you for the patience as I took time for myself over work.

UPDATE The GFM is back ON HOWEVER, some extra measures are being taken on the operational side of it and GFM has held funds for right now while it undergoes additional review We are OKAY with that, so NO NEED to reach out to GFM on our behalf Please be mindful of this

I love and am grateful for all of you. I am trying to keep it together and balance needs, as well as what a working society expects from me Thank you for your love and grace as this is navigated. I hope everyone here knows how much I love them

UPDATE: I've talked with Charlie's family and we've been asked to postpone the stream until next weekend (time TBD). They believe they've sorted things out with GoFundMe but it may take few days before it's back up. Thank you for understanding & I hope you'll join us next weekend 💞

A lot of our friends are making moves to help. A lot of them are under stress too and having to navigate all of this. They need love and support too. It’s all just so much.

I can delete this later but I just want to explain things better I’m sorry

I talked to Charlie for some years about having them come with me to the Houston rodeo and then driving to TFF. Making it a whole thing. The rodeo isn’t the same anymore, it’s crowded and expensive but I’d like to dream that we would have a great time We were planning disney trips with Ben

Still awaiting GoFundMe updates and Charlie’s family is on the same page as me Hellaverse, they also expressed that they are aware of the stream and sister in law says she’s so sorry and that she knows yall would like to do this soon

ITS BEEN NON STOP HORROR FOR 4 DAYS I NEED A MINUTE

There is so much rage in my body and my roommates dog is non stop barking (I went back home because my mom fell asleep last night and locked up her house) The dog keeps waking me up every 5 minutes and and my professor hasn’t emailed me back and I am just so tired I’m so tired I’m so tired

I emailed my professor that I am still really sick this morning. In the middle of the night/morning I coughed non stop (like my throat would snag almost?) and it was upsetting as fuck Im going to try and sleep I will do my best to keep yall updated on the GoFundMe. This week’s been nonstop horror

Please hold off for now. We are trying to work on figuring out why it was removed, and I think the weekend is the issue. We are still waiting to be in “contact” with a “real person” It has been difficult trying to work with the family remotely, and, they are all very frazzled & out of their element

I’ve been actively working with Charlie’s family to figure things out

I am in contact with Ben, his sister in law and brother in law, and GoFundMe (trying to get past the AI chat) Does anyone have experience with this?

I don’t know why the gofundme is down but Charlie’s sister in law is speaking with gofundme now about it I may need y’all’s help

Oh my god my roommate told me she thinks Charlie came to visit me because a cardinal came by the house and was in the window I feel tiny. I miss my bubby

I am home at my house. I will be packing a bag. I will be on my PC. I will be processing everything I’ll be right back. I am not trying to claim victim hood. I am just. Wow. Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!???

I wouldn’t normally bring attention to this. I don’t want to. I don’t want to ask for help But today when I told one of my boss’s that i haven’t missed a day this month until all of this happened, he scoffed and said “You really blew that one didn’t you?” There is no HR I need help

One of my managers just laughed at me and said things aren’t looking good for me

I’m still sick. I’m on my way to work. Going to figure out how to handle today.

How am I supposed to do this without you?

This is all I could muster after years of not drawing. This was hard. Charlie I’m sorry it’s not the best, I’m sorry I haven’t kept up drawing to make you something better. I’ll work on it, I promise. I know you’d still love it. I miss you. I love you.

I'm going to miss you, you loveable fucking goofball.

the love you radiated is eternal. as evident in those that knew you. rest easy, my friend 💛

I showered today for the first time since Monday, so that’s nice. Pray I sleep before 10 or 11 and pray I stay asleep until I have to wake up for work. Thank you again to my friends that bought me meals. You don’t know what it means to me

🧡 @gooddaycharlie.bsky.social

💔

Also - mom’s birthday was today, I was in bed all day. We’ve been getting along so much better this last year. So I will try to have a dinner with her either tomorrow or sometime this weekend after class. My head feels less fuzzy as of like two hours ago, so I think I’m finally starting to heal

The notifications are starting to slow, but I’m still getting a lot of them (which isn’t bad. Just a lot) So if I missed anyone or anything, sorry. Thanks for your patience As for telegram, I will get with everyone when I can breathe

I have ripped off all of the skin on my lips with my teeth. I have to work tomorrow. The song they once sent me when I was feeling down has been non stop playing in my head, against my will I can’t get a solid 8 hours and I keep feeling like this is all made up More issues came up. So much

Charlie also, and I’m sorry. My heads been so fuzzy that I feel it’s important to mention this. I didn’t intend to not. Charlie leaves behind two nephews. They are very young boys and the oldest is very crushed. Will keep posted if there’s anything we can do

My meds, tests and food, liquids, comfort items like iPad, slippers sleep pants, and switch and headphones etc etc etc are all at my house and it is 40 minutes from where I am I will be okay. Just venting frustration. I think I’m only eating and sleeping because of how sick I am. Deleting later

The plan is to eat a meal my sweet friend bought me, sleep more, then try and drive to my house before the sun goes down to either get my things, and come back, or stay home entirely (I live out in the country so only Amazon goes out there and it’s further from work than my mom’s)

It feels crazy to me that I have to get back into the normal routine while I’m still grieving,but bills still need to be paid. I’ll be back to posting today and I need to open back up for new work for Feb.But please never forget Charlie, repost photos/videos/the GFM and love each other a bit harder.

I woke up the same level of sick. I don’t know if it’s Covid or just a really nasty sinus infection or what. I feel beyond terrible, I am pissing off my work with the days I’m missing (I called out a lot last year) and I am losing so much money I feel so. Lost. I don’t know. I don’t understand

I need to eat a meal without it going cold I need to shower I need to sleep I need to be off of my phone I still don’t feel good I am so sick

Struggling to draw and drawing is a safe space for me when shit happens. It’s making everything so much harder and I just feel constantly frustrated on top of the pain. Thank you to everyone that’s reached out and been so kind. Everything is hard and passing weirdly right now. I miss my friend.

Furry friends, IDPollution has also graciously put together plans for a charity art stream If this is an interest to you, please gather with them and support them

I have said a lot of “my uncle this my uncle that” for years lmao But I am from a large Hispanic family with 6 uncles + married in uncles. Each one has felt like an additional father to me We have, over the last decade, lost 3 of them tragically. I have lost a lot. Of people. This past decade.

When my uncle died, yall bought badges from me so I could fly to say goodbye to him When my ex fiancée had left me suddenly a day after saying “I’m not going anywhere”, yall stepped in, helped me fund a new apartment + storage money It is. Hard for me to receive help again. I feel I owe yall.

Sharky, from the Hellaverse Fandom and alike, had graciously reached out to me regarding this eulogy collective and has extended the offer to the Furry Community as well Please feel free to participate if you’d like to, and the finish product will be given to Ben

I slept a little. A lot of folks have asked me if they can send me money and that’s so kind of you But I feel like a dick receiving it. But admittedly I also need help Prioritize Ben first. I don’t know what to give yall for me. I don’t know how to do this

This is Ben Please be kind to him. Please give him your energy, your strength, your love and support I love you Ben. I love you forever.

I’m going to sleep now. I will try and check in later.

I am the weakest I’ve ever been. I will delete this later Please be mindful. This isn’t about my friends, mutuals and anyone who’s been gracious reaching out to me. If you reached out to me in kindness on telegram or facebook, this isn’t about you. I promise.