I let the patrons vote on what to open, and they almost picked Desert Storm cards, so this is actually really nice! Come watch at 4pm Pacific! www.youtube.com/live/Pib0stA...

At this point it kinda feels like 50 Cent got into music so he could fund his true passion of being the greatest Hater in all of recorded history

Mint on Card is Friday night, and we're stacked! Join me with @jasonv.bsky.social @joeybragg.bsky.social @kyleayers.bsky.social @anylaurie16.bsky.social Anna Simeri and Ryan O'Flanagan at Blast from the Past in Burbank! Never a cover charge, lotsa giveaways, the best night in a Burbank! Come by!

Hell yeah, that's the exact age my grandma's heart exploded

Would y'all be cool if we started doing a blood thing at the shows?

Great episode of Jeff Has Cool Friends just dropped with the amazing @tjchambersla.bsky.social over on the Patreon! We slid right into it and lost track of time and it's really fun and good and helpful and listen to it! www.patreon.com/posts/144898...

TSO Fun Fact: Buy a fucking shirt, 85% of us have child support payments due

Yeah, I recall the most famous reindeer of all. That's what "most famous of all" means, you fucking dolt.

Let this be the motto of the AI movement.

Is this anything?

Look at this insane lineup for they're December 5th Mint on Card! LOOK AT IT! PLUS giveaways all night? I think we're doing comedy wrong, because this should be expensive, but it's free instead

I love that Home Alone 2 has an extended bit where Kevin McAllister fakes a mass shooting right after calling Tim Curry gay

The Brian Kiley episode of JHCF is free everywhere! He has Emmys for both times of day! Just type "Jeff Has Cool Friends" wherever you get your podcasts!

Thanksgiving is merely Christmas-Halftime. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

A whole season about movies @nerdnumbers.com hasn't seen is a great idea. I am absolutely flabbergasted and baffled by the December episodes movie. Mostly because it's the only one of these I have seen, but damn.

The latest episode of NERD! is available for free everywhere! We talked about 2011's Warrior, which is way better than it has any right being. It's also a movie @nerdnumbers.com hadn't seen yet. Come listen for free on Patreon.com/jeffmay or anywhere else you find Jeff Has Cool Friends!

“My emails to human traffickers have people asking a lot of questions already answered by my emails”

It's the most wonderful time of the year (when I get to post this gif way too much)

Making a lot of concessions about how much I hate hearing about Jesus and how much I love Christmas music

Reading an "Urgent" email from the Democrats.

Good morning! Time to enjoy a brand new HYPECAST with the lovely @heytherejeffro.bsky.social! Listen! SoundCloud: shorturl.at/APVOr Apple: shorturl.at/tcGKy YouTube: shorturl.at/iWCO6

I wonder if Dems are going to realize that simply not being the other guys is no longer enough, and they actually have to like, do stuff for actual human people, now.

Can't believe we have to say this again, but if you catch fire at one of our shows, it's your 100% fault. Read the fine print when you buy your tickets next time, you flammable losers.

Me and my friends would've killed Dick Chaney with hammers i can tell you that much

What a weird way to find out Dick Cheney had a heart

News: "It's unclear if the LAPD will protect Los Angeles' most vulnerable citizens from Federal Overreach." LAPD when Brown People do anything:

Mourning Wood

If y'all haven't listened to the latest JHCF with Jenn Sterger, you're nodding out on an INSANE bundle of stories. www.patreon.com/posts/142226...

Opening up some chunky-ass Avengers cards today at 4pm Pacific. If you don't watch, it means you're a bad person who smells like a fat sack of turds. Sorry, I don't make the rules. www.youtube.com/live/KfZ7crt...

New #MondayShow up now! @adamtodbrown.bsky.social and @heytherejeffro.bsky.social talk out of shape ICE agents, the destruction of the East Wing, a prison population milestone, and so much more! Apple: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/t... Spotify: open.spotify.com/episode/5Ox6...

Blood Rave in Blade rips, but it makes no sense. That would be like going to a party that showers you with protein shakes.

I used to train cops how to box, and let me tell you, there's not much more of a satisfying feeling than making a cop bleed and then telling them it's their fault for their lack of skill.

Facebook is...not doing great.

The next time a dude says "Women are too sensitive," show him one of these 4 images and ask how it makes him feel.

I open the Batman cards today at 4pm Pacific with my bud The Taffeta Darling! Come watch! www.youtube.com/live/geN-sKE...

Sitting in traffic, watching a G5 touching down in Van Nuys airport, I instinctively yelled "Oh, fuck you, moneybitch!"

Man, fuck this.

BAH! Enough talk! My <Beam Blast> shall make short work of you!

Today at 4pm Pacific. Celebrate Jeff. www.youtube.com/live/tzPMFYS...

We've made some pretty great technological leaps since 1897. What I'm saying is that I'd put money down that we could probably fuck Dracula up with some kind of weird Kickstarter flashlight or if you ran him over with your car while he's a bunch of rats.

Not only am I opening this box today at 4pm Pacific, but I'll be accepting @nerdnumbers.com challenge to show off the weirdest graded card in my collection! Come watch and hang! www.youtube.com/live/SXKenEA...

It's @erichowk.bsky.social Day over on Jeff Has Cool Friends! You might know him from @portugaltheman.bsky.social, or maybe you know him from being cool and my friend! Either way, check out patreon.com/jeffmay for early access to uncensored episode with bonus content! NOW! DO IT NOW!

I'm home, let's open some friggin overpriced Disney cards today (Wednesday) at 4pm Pacific! www.youtube.com/live/hjkox4L...

The only correct choice for the Super Bowl halftime performance is whoever I, specifically, liked when I was 15. Any other choice should be considered an act of sedition.

Mint on Card is this Friday at Blast from the Past in Burbank! This lineup is sick as hell, the show is free, and we've got all sorts of free shit to give away! Come hang, because if you don't, it means you're a loser with bad breath.

Has anyone checked to see if Pete Davidson has taken pilot lessons recently?

Absolute all-timer sentence in today's @nytimes.com

Men's Rights Activists going on their podcasts to complain about how men are having less sex than ever