Luke Kennard
@lukekennard.bsky.social
š¤ 1941
š„ 716
š 1439
Novelist, poet, lecturer at University of Birmingham.
pinned post!
Reminder that my new poetry collection (my SEVENTH because I apparently cannot take a hint) is available from Picador
www.panmacmillan.com/authors/luke...
3 months ago
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I made a traditional E-card. Maybe try opening it with Notepad.
2 days ago
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I like to catch up on games Iāve missed at this time of year. Found āand Rogerā very moving. Itās only a couple of bucks and a couple of hours long, but itās incredible.
3 days ago
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Inspired by all the British comedians with bestselling poetry collections I try my hand and standup and drown myself in a shallow river on the way home.
3 days ago
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Imagine having a list of favourite cookbooks of 2025. Imagine having had time to cook even a single recipe from a single cookbook in order to have *one* favourite cookbook of 2025.
4 days ago
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Hello, yes, Iām looking for the kind of pĆ¢tĆ© that killed the Medicis
6 days ago
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My uber is coming in *19 minutes*. This is because someone gave me less than 5* because I wouldnāt invest in his mail order trees start-up. It just didnāt seem like a viable business.
7 days ago
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Posting the equivalent of an Out Of Office email on social media is such an endearingly self-important thing to do. Unless this is your job. I guess for some people this is their job. Whatever, donāt let me tell you what to do.
7 days ago
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Iām reviewing a novel thatās like the prose equivalent of slow cinema. Itās brilliant, but I keep feeling like I should just gradually put some cutlery away or languorously peel an orange and it would be a similar sort of experience
7 days ago
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Birmingham launch for Black Bag in March! At my favourite bookshop!
add a skeleton here at some point
7 days ago
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It is late in the year, but my goodness the new John Stammers collection (his first in some time) is just amazing, and full of the kind of deeply funny and sad and magnanimous poems that somehow *should* take a decade-plus to really nail
7 days ago
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At just over 14,000 pages Kennardās 4th novel proved off-putting to readers as it seemed to require them to read nothing else for several years and was also impossible to store, turn pages of, or fit through almost any door in the country
7 days ago
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Ah I used to watch this with my sister back when YouTube was still a home delivery VHS subscription service
youtu.be/uRzhd3eUyO8?...
loading . . .
Animals of YouTube sing "Jingle Bells"
YouTube video by Talking Animals
https://youtu.be/uRzhd3eUyO8?si=6KYXV7Bf54VV-tDY
8 days ago
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Do they still do that thing where they get you to initial for cashback and then give you the receipt that you initialled?
8 days ago
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Experts say the snow could hit Orkneys as far south as the Holm of Papa!
8 days ago
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A good way of shaming yourself for eating a whole giant bag of crisps is to pour them on a plate and it also makes it easier to eat them
9 days ago
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1. Bug Boy and the Nasty Attic 2. AXE 2: You Have the Right to Remain MURDERED 3. Thursday Morning at the Skull Cafe 4. La Wall et La Sky (Un Roman)
9 days ago
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In all seriousness if you are trying to find a present for a DAD (or an ADVENTURER) you will not find better
add a skeleton here at some point
10 days ago
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No shade intended, but I cannot quite believe that people are blogging again. It just seems like a kind of selfhood and performance of selfhood that died with the minidisc player.
10 days ago
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reposted by
Luke Kennard
gibbet cage
10 days ago
You donāt actually need a Chair+ subscription to unlock soft mode for the cushion fibres. You can flash linux to the chair through the hidden microSD slot in the front left leg and unlock it for free
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I got a DM from a clearly AI-generated account asking me a specific but kind of empty question about my writing and now theyāre bullying me because I havenāt replied.
10 days ago
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So many songs just reveal the inner paucity of the lyricist. āBlah blah blah / Xmas / another year older / And What have you done?ā A bunch of things, actually - I have a meaningful life
11 days ago
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The new Knives Out is roughly 700x better than the execrable 2nd one which I hated so much I lost two long-term friendships over it.
11 days ago
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reposted by
Luke Kennard
Ross Sayers
11 days ago
My girlfriend: what's happening now Me: *peering through the curtains at the front of the inn* so the pregnant lady is still on the donkey. Oh the man's coming back out. He's shaking his head. Omg there must be no room for them. Aww I feel bad
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I think the best hangover song of all time is REMās āHow The West Was Won And Where It Got Usā. Thatās like my hangover anthem. Scott Walkerās āFarmer in the Cityā a close second.
14 days ago
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Stateside pre-release write-up of my next novel from Publishers Weekly!
www.publishersweekly.com/9781638933380
loading . . .
Black Bag by Luke Kennard
This delightful and dark picaresque from Kennard (The Transition) follows a mid-career English actor struggling to make ends mee...
https://www.publishersweekly.com/9781638933380
14 days ago
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Just had a āpulled turkeyā sandwich because I was like, oh wow you can *pull* turkey? And no, having eaten it, no you absolutely canāt, and they should have stopped pulling it the moment that became clear.
15 days ago
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Once again EXCLUDED from the Ondaatje Prize because apparently THE LIFE OF THE MIND does not count as a PLACE
15 days ago
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-As poet laureate of Birmingham this is your seventh poem about Uniqlo and people are starting to ask questions. -Weāve needed a Uniqlo for *so* long. If people donāt like it they can take it up with Uniqlo.
16 days ago
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Iām workshopping why, in a strong field, I despise the rat pack Christmas songs most of all
16 days ago
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Ah well, itās only Ā£11bn of our money that we earned in our jobs that we have to do all the time, and then gave to the government - letās just write it off the way you do when one of us doesnāt pay a bill or something
17 days ago
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I appreciate the ecological gesture, but the design of a liquid soap bottle is *very* precisely calibrated to its viscosity, and if you water down the last bit it will JET OUT at an acute angle into the userās face and top
17 days ago
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Well thatās just not going to be true for *anyone*, is it, Outlook?
18 days ago
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My 2025 of the year
18 days ago
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I guess the first thing you should know about my just-published book is that this is a bunch of things that were bothering me 3-5 years ago and I canāt really even remember what most of them were now.
21 days ago
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My kidsā generation are in this enviable position where thereās no pressure whatsoever to be on social media because itās *so shit*
21 days ago
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Treading in dog shit is one of those situations where youāre allowed to feel very hard done by for about 2 seconds but then itās entirely *your* problem - youāre the cause, the source, the spreader,
22 days ago
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On āFAQ Redditā, starting a new thread like, āGuys, Iām thinking of getting into frequently asked questions, like I want to start asking some frequently asked questions - where should I start?ā
23 days ago
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One thing paying £280 council tax a month during a full year of bin strikes has taught me is the power of love
23 days ago
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- Hi, Iād like to buy these groceries, please. - Link in bio. - Oh, in that case I donāt think Iāll bother.
23 days ago
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Top 10 alleys in central Birmingham to hide and eat a hotdog you put too many toppings on
23 days ago
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Bespattering my mateās flat with murals to the exact point that he has to pay mansion tax
23 days ago
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Guy who emphasises the first syllable of kangaroo
24 days ago
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I almost bought the Ltd edition gingerbread flavour Doritos but I kept thinking about Liz Lemon getting addicted to Sabor de Soledads.
25 days ago
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You never heard of elf on the shelf now get ready for endless variations on something else you never heard of
25 days ago
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reposted by
Luke Kennard
con questi nuovi ritmi americani (she/her) š³ļøāā§ļøšµšøš³
about 2 months ago
I'm excited to share my piece in Los Angeles Review of Books
@lareviewofbooks.bsky.social
, which examines OpenAI's claims about ChatGPT's creative writing skills, Big Tech's weaponisation of grief and nostalgia, and the collapse of the academic humanities.
lareviewofbooks.org/article/lite...
loading . . .
Literature Is Not a Vibe: On ChatGPT and the Humanities | Los Angeles Review of Books
Rachele Dini discusses OpenAIās āA Machine-Shaped Handā and an academic sector in crisis.
https://lareviewofbooks.org/article/literature-is-not-a-vibe-on-chatgpt-and-the-humanities/
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Lmfao most of us would happily lay down our lives for our children without a momentās hesitation, but go off, I guess
28 days ago
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āThere is a special place in hell for people who misattribute quotations to get Instagram likes.ā - Franz Kafka
28 days ago
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The audiobook of my 2nd novel has been missing its last chapter for five years, and has now been sorted š
add a skeleton here at some point
28 days ago
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Welcome to Stratford station, London, where we donāt BELIEVE in the stuffy numerical order! Platform 1, 14, 8, 10! Donāt get it confused with 10a now!
29 days ago
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Meteorologists, what is causing literally just Birmingham to be -1 degrees at the moment? Everywhere else Iāve been from London to the Highlands is positively balmy.
29 days ago
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