Can we talk about how fucking weird the 2000s were for commercials? 🧵

For saying that Alex Ovechkin is a Putin-loving piece of shit, I got added to a blocklist called "Ovechkin haters". 🤣

Okay...so hear me out... What if old frame, new art? 🤔

🫩 let's 🫩 go 🫩 kraken 🫩

Last hockey game of the year.

Oh yeah, that project I was working on. www.cardkingdom.com/landing/2025...

HLLPC NEAH WQWD Oh no. I'm going to have a brain aneurysm.

Man, I am loving playing P99 with friends but holy shit, the community has some real "I peaked in 9th grade", "that's gay is how I say I hate things" vibes that are cringe af.

Oh, right. The construction. The construction for Cuzko, the construction chosen especially to build Cuzko, Cuzko's construction.

"I'm going to sell my car to buy a jpg of a poorly drawn monkey" "That's an incredibly dumb idea" [Market tanks] "My poorly drawn monkey!"

Merry Crysis to all who celebrate.

Gang's all here!

Christmas Eve? Time to eat a pizza, my bodyweight in Christmas cookies gifted from my wonderful friends, and get blasted on boozy egg nog and wake up on Monday morning. Merry Krismas.

Call me Les Schwab because I am so fucking tired. 👉😉👉

Delivering dubs to Seattle this holiday season 🎁

I'm loving the hype that I've been seeing online for Torrent games. If more people get into hockey via the Torrent, we can force Climate Pledge to open the upper bowl and pack the place! They're a ton of fun, are super affordable, and have free transit passes to and from!

Weird. Murphy's player profile looks a little different tonight. A .974 SV%?! In the immortal words of Kucherov, ARE YOU KEEDDING ME?

Seattle's eating good tonight. @pwhltorrent.bsky.social @seattlekraken.com

People are complaining that DDR5 is expensive now. Fucking losers. Why play DDR5 when you can play the far superior game - DDR Mario Mix.

Ya ever spend roughly a bajillion hours working on a project and you finally finish it and your stomach stops hurting randomly?

lol, the first rule of the internet is about to hit in full force. "Once it's on the internet, it is always on the internet." Hell yeah.

Oh yeah, don't forget that the minimum wage in Seattle is $43,180.80/yr ($20.76/hr).

Meanwhile, the Seattle Torrent play in an arena that's a tax write-off for a person with a $240.1B Net Worth.

"Huh. A statue of a cow. I wonder what it represents." [C O W] "Fair enough..."

Damn, the past couple of days have been real rough for people who suck and go into boxing rings.

Took a wrong turn on my way to Climate Pledge and ended up at Pacific Coliseum for the @pwhlgoldeneyes.bsky.social vs. @victoire-lphf.bsky.social game. Oopsie doodles. Great arena. Loved the wooden roofs.

Berkly Catton - Injured Reserve Mason Marchment - Traded Me - Hasn't given up a single NHL goal. skill issue, really

BREAKING: I direct that the US instantly stop listening to a fucking tinfoil-hat Speak-and-Spell.

Good ol' late-night yell into the void post. Ya ever have one of those moments where someone explains the rules of a game, you do what they say, you still lose, and you don't know what you did wrong? That's how I feel when my friends describe me as "a catch".

Meanwhile, the Seahawks:

Remember when people didn't get hired unless they had good communication skills? Pepperidge Farms remembers.

100% this. I love going to @seattlekraken.com games for sure but there's something about @pwhltorrent.bsky.social games that just hit different.

Update: Looks like it's working! Let's goooooo!

Kinda a bummer that @climatepledgearena.com doesn't add the free transit passes for @pwhltorrent.bsky.social games. Works for all events except PWHL. I've heard showing your game ticket gets around it though. It's a great perk to ease the stresses on the roads near the arena.

Ahahaha. It is LIVE. Hahahaha

Fun fact: You can eat away your sadness after another Kraken loss with enough cookies.

Oddly enough, if you were to say "Hey Kris. What's the most iconic Nicol Bolas art?" I would describe this one, not realizing that it's not for Nicol Bolas, but instead for the planeswalker version from Conflux. None of the arts for "Nicol Bolas" creature really click in my brain.

I will not apologize for this.

Wrong Person Dies Again: tinyurl.com/5afdfp9x

Some day, I will not suck absolute ass at limited. That day is not today. Tomorrow ain't looking good either. Ya know, now that I think about it, maybe I spoke too soon on that "Some day" part.

Well now...

"Haha, cue that one Andrew WK party song" "Wait... which one? Party Hard? Party Til You Puke? It's Time to Party? Long Live the Party? Fun Night? Tear It Up?"

Lol, lmao, rofl, etc.

I'm giving out this star, so get it while you can folks