"Four cakes, Jeremy? Four? That's insane"

Up to midnight with Beverly Kenney. I hope everyone had the best Christmas Day available to them.

Me describing my brother-in-law when he comes for Christmas dinner.

Just finished watching It’s a Wonderful Life, and I’m not being funny but this guy’s a right cunt x

"And from the crew of Apollo 8 we close with good night, good luck, a Merry Christmas, and God bless all of you, all of you on the good earth."

If I was Pat Cummins I'd declare now and get this all done by lunch.

Stephen Collins in today's Guardian.

Please enjoy this photo of my granddad, Ernie, and the telegram he sent to my nana the day he came home from the war. Nine months later, my dad was born

"Trump & Orban will appear at Blackpool Palace of Varieties from May to September. Contact the box office for ticket prices."

The new Charlatans album is terrific, really terrific. And 'We Are Love' is so obviously a lost Smiths track that I went looking to see if Johnny Marr is playing on it.

Let's just take a moment to reflect on the self-sacrifice and hope this person embodies - not the evil, hateful monsters thirsting for violence.

Absolute filth from Nigel Slater in today's Observer.

My main take from this girlband thing on BBC2 is that Mel Blatt is a fucking legend.

Good to see pleasant-smelling concierges from fictitious Mitteleuropa hotels are safe from AI.

Today’s newsletter: some thoughts on a shocking new poll and a great speech by John Major:

Buckle up.

"First, we seize the means of production of the membership list without a breach of GDPR rules, thus ensuring a fine of €20 million or 2% of annual global turnover, whichever is higher, comrades."

An absolute guarantee that one of them will be wearing an Arsenal away shirt from 2011.

"I'd give that five minutes if I were you."

People who say you get an extra hour in bed when the clocks go back have obviously never got up at 2am and spent an hour putting every clock in the house back an hour.

Watched A House Of Dynamite. It's pretty good, and a decent adaptation of Annie Jacobson's book even if it doesn't officially reference it. The reviews having a go at the ending are laughable; how do you think a massive nuclear exchange ends but with anything other than 5bn dead?

This feels like a practical joke that's gone too far.

I've got such a fucking awful cold that I can honestly say I now know what Barry White would sound like if he came from Teesside.

With the greatest respect: no shit, Emily.

Me hearing my daughter explaining what music I should be listening to.

Just posting some late night Len, Graham, George and Laurie.

The new series about Scorcese on Apple TV is sensational, btw.

Can confirm @michaelglasper.bsky.social is a real person! Finally met him. Was arseholed. Can you believe it?

(Things could be) Marvellous.

I've just discovered that the greatest cricket writer of his generation, Gideon Haigh, is now writing for The Observer. Cummins faces up to stressful reality of Ashes mortality share.google/u6vRHgYZveWc...

I’m gonna defend Liz Truss, because I like to be blocked by two or so people every day, and say that her plans were 100 times more reasonable than these, in that she thought she would have enough time to bounce Tory MPs into backing spending cuts. Much less daft than anything Badenoch has said.

Me reading your posts.

🎶 Then I saw her face, now I'm a

Explaining to my wife that I cannot simply “read the books I’ve already bought and haven’t read” like some kind of peasant.

The Man in the White Suit (1951, b&w; dir Alexander Mackendrick)

Watching Eva Longoria Searching for Spain and

New Partridge is the best AP thing on TV, Scissored Isle notwithstanding, since the first series of I'm Alan Partridge.

Partridge having a copy of the scripts of his first few radio and TV shows on his bookshelf is an incredible Easter egg, and I claim my five pound prize.

Gonna tell my kids this was Fleetwood Mac.

Putting your rubbish in a neighbour's wheelie bin early on a Sunday morning.

"Choose a life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning... Choose painting a fence. Choose running the raffle. Choose cutting the half-time fucking orange."

The Bellamy Brothers were later sacked for inappropriate behaviour in the workplace. #totp

Narrator: "But football did not come home" #totp

Smokie's less successful follow-up single.

Hard to argue with a single word of this review. If you've never seen The Swimmer, do yourself a favour this Tuesday.

Just noticed that from the early morning of Sunday 12 October Talking Pictures TV are repeating - wait for it - Eurotrash! So if you missed this series first time round or only saw bits like I did then here’s an opportunity to see what all the fuss was about. talkingpicturestv.co.uk/schedule/