Dopamine is a banger, I fear

Good morning. I had a dream last night that I was positioned near a nuclear explosion in a way where I would survive the initial blast but was confronted with the fact that I definitely was going to die of radiation exposure!

Grindr has starting pushing ads for Marvel Snap to me, a game I have played daily for over 2 years. I love effective advertising.

I love that I can't watch a whole movie without falling asleep unless I am multitasking! Feels good and normal!

GAMBIT IS A STRATEGIST

Everything is so fucking stupid

Well, well, well...if it seems like it is almost "Democrats will never learn a single fucking lesson" o' clock

I don't think my tiddies will fit within that Blastoise filter. I am built different.

Making these groceries stretchhhhhhhh, bitch

Don't know how I hadn't heard 'House Tour' until yesterday but good lord, I want to know what witch transported that little woman back to 1987 to record that track. Truly a song to clean your house to on Saturday morning if there ever was one.

Meatball is so real for continually flirting with this chef on Gastronauts because he is FINE

The people above me have been jumping up and down in different spots for the last 15 minutes so intensely that I was seeing my ceiling flex? Is that good?

Imagine having that much money yet somehow being so deeply unlikeable that you still can't buy an election at THIS POINT in American history

Don’t want “belly rubs” or “cuddles” i want men to send me $50-$100.

I've watched enough horror movies to know that this first death is a fake out and Cheney is going to pop up again to take one more victim

I've been watching the Naked Gun movies today and I forgot that 33 1/3 1/3 came out in 1994. What a huge year for OJ fans!

Old roommate is sending me AI generated WWF promos featuring dead celebrities

Just got an ad on Instagram about the best items to buy at 7-11 in Japan. Bitch, I'm can't afford food in this country, why would you show me this, shut the fuck up

Crazy that they knew I am a top

We did it

The fucking Google search bar showing me AI search suggestions rather than my recent searches is going to make me commit sewerslide

Sometimes I wonder how much I could get done if I wasn't having to actively fight every piece of technology and equipment I own.

I should not need an app with a password to change the color of a lightbulb

Attitude, if you get Ginny Lemon to pose for you in a jock, the least you could do is include one shot of cheeks

Hi, I had an interview today for a job at a branch of the area's community college that seemed to go well, please send me positive energy so I can get this job and not have to k**l myself

My leasing office just sent this shit out. They have lost the fucking plot.

This is such an insane, cruel, and stupid time to be alive

I was watching the second season of Smiling Friends today and was really shocked with a random inclusion of the R slur (which was interestingly bleeped but in the subtitles). I don't know who that word's publicist is, but talk about a career comeback!

I finally watched Sinners and you were all right, it kicks ass

I know that's fucking right www.xrite.com/hue-test

Just for the taste of it

I know that usage of slang evolves over time, but I have to say everytime I hear a white person use the word "unc" I age 6 months

Maddie Morphosis has been interviewing a lot of human people I have never seen before in my life

A big Diet Dr. Pepper would fix me

I am at my most powerful when I type up a thirsty response and then delete it

I understand why you would recommend this YouTube but trust and believe that I have no plans to listen to Ms. Nicklesmell again

It would be very sexy if someone gave me their Peacock login

The asymmetry in the diagonals in the union jack is really fucked up, imo

I mean, it's a good starting point

That new Pokémon game has you all France-pilled. It's Emily in Paris all over again, I fear...

I love waking up to a panic attack!

October has been 4 minutes long

I have a friend offering to cook me something with tofu in it and I am doing everything in my power to say "Please don't, you don't know what you are doing" without saying the words

Katya's little hairpiece kinda me want one, because it looked weird at first and now my brain just "yeah that's her hair"

The written word is so fascinating because I can see people string a whole series of word together in a way that clearly represented a coherent thought to them but I am just sitting here like "???"

I still think it is really fucked up we live in a world where I have to give ebay my SSN to get paid for stuff I sell.

Hey, if you don't follow me why they fuck would you randomly like exactly 1 (one) of my posts where I am clearly venting about my personal life? I know this is public but, like, I am clearly only talking to the five or so people that interact with me here??

Huge win for the oyster cracker community

I've also been dealing with some medical stuff for a month now so I finally broke down and went to the doctor yesterday, one of the prescriptions I need is $166. I called the pharmacy to see if they had a generic and they said it was the cheapest one they have. I'm so fucking over everything.