The moment the Jordan staffer’s soul left her body…

“He desired. He desired desiring. He desired being desired. He desired desire itself.” So, I have a new Insta bio.

OF COURSE, OF COURSE!

NEW: Epstein survivors release the most powerful PSA I have ever seen. Make this go viral so every member of the House of Representatives sees it.

The thing about the Bubba rumors is even if it’s not true, it’s not going away. Very much like the couch fucking rumors around JD Vance. It’s going to drive that orange shit stain crazy.

what was his crime? being right? having a succulent correct take?!

Forbes can eat it with their profiles in porridge.

Time for a European intelligence agency to pull the pin on the grenade.

[very loud sigh]

Nein! A Tribute to Rammstein will be performing this Friday at the Temecula VFW hall.

New Arby’s ad just dropped.

Everything we know about the allegations against Kavanaugh www.pbs.org/newshour/pol... Here is a look at the allegations from Christine Blasey Ford, Deborah Ramirez and Julie Swetnick, along with the general allegations of Kavanaugh lying to Congress in greater detail. Trumps sexual abuser buddy

I've given my new Senator a lot of shit on here. But I don't think anyone with power has laid out the stakes of what we're facing as clearly as she does right here. And if she's saying this, it's because she feels she must.

If there is a hell, it'll be an endless succession of YouTube videos of mic demoes with female singers breathlessly over-emoting the most hackneyed lyrics possible, alternating with synth demoes where the reviewer repeatedly says the word "button" with nary a trace of the letter T.

That one neighbor on your HOA

I’m going to get ahead of ol’ croaky and start chopping up big fat lines of dioxin.

Boy, the backing vocal part of Black Coffee in Bed will really sort out the shitty cover bands from the good ones.

This right here.

Half Sam, half thumb.

Samesies

The average age of U.S. homebuyers is now 56, up from 49 last year. In 1981, the year trickledown economics began, it was 31.

Just saw a Seth Abramson post with a 🧵 on a Monday morning before any coffee. That’s a hard no.

Has the president gone on a shitting run this morning? What’s the White House feces forcast?

It’s wild to find that there are things I know once existed in the world that are completely unfindable on the internet. It’s been happening more and more to me. I know things have been lost to time forever but it’s sobering to realize that I’ll be taking that small slice of past with me when I go.

macOS Tahoe is total garbage. IOS 26, also garbage. A classic case of making changes just to make changes. It runs fine but they've totally fucked up the interface on almost every core app and made the usability worse.

The firings will continue until unemployment improves.

Foghorns of Mediocrity is a great name for a sorta decent Fountains of Wayne tribute band.

I had plenary authority over that frozen pizza last night.

Whoa.

Never once have I thought, "I'd like to have this email summarized!"

Citizen, your microwave with Hot Pocket/Not Hot Pocket Technology knows you are trying to circumvent intellectual property law by selecting the chimichanga setting. Please remain seated while we dispatch a reeducation officer.

"deep personal inadequacies" theintercept.com/2025/09/30/t...

Beautifully stated.

The purge is coming.

Felt cute, might dystopian later.

Like my Ex. A narcissist who gets their fix by helping people and catching the savior glow. A benevolent narcissist. But it ends badly when the beneficiary starts to get attention for their improvements or doesn't express sufficient gratitude. Move on to next the project person, repeat, repeat...

Weird how after I removed Tik Tok from my phone, an app I never used, my battery life is suddenly much better. 🤔

To be auto-posted in perpetuity.

Big Elevator is having its moment.

Too late, Disney. The damage is done. Consider yourselves tossed on the pile with Target as companies that squandered the good will of the people.

Get ready for a multitude of Mustangs to wreck themselves when leaving Charlie Kirk’s memorial.

This is so, so good. #AlettaJacobs www.instagram.com/p/DOrkcN3Diq...

As I’ve grown older, I’ve really come to appreciate the expression James Baldwin often wore on his face in interviews. A combination of knowing, incredulity and that’s some bullshit.

This is the same guy.

“How you died, does not redeem how you lived”