stomach: GROWLING 🦁

teeth: CLEANED ✨

raw is law or whatever they say

tryna make Joe Biden proud by riding Amtrak a lot lately

what’s it like to make seven figures? i just don’t see any downsides lol (jk mostly kinda)

i’m sore

corporate dad core (is that a thing?)

fyi

held an urgent restroom run from 8am till 3pm send condolences cookies

proof i went back

Stark Sands

one of the nice things about being away from your home gym for a bit is coming back to brand new gym crushes 🥵🥰

ive gotten really bad at keeping up with replying to replies and i'm having a full-on identity crisis cuz who tf am i if not that

when the morning coffee 💩hits in the middle of a zoom interview HELP

the only Chicago weiner I had this trip (it hiiiiiit though 🤤)

conference over, fully in zombie mode

pinstripes for day 2

what if there was never another jukebox biomusical about a musician and their various lovers/struggles again wow much to ponder

Pet adoption agency called Deez Mutz

doctors are getting younger and hotter wtf

omg i keep forgetting how chatty Uber drivers are in not nyc HELP!

forgot to share the conference day 1 fit sorryyyyyy

this and devil wears prada on the tv is about all i had energy for tonight

and we’re back to being surrounded by hot straight guys in tailored suits all weekend

good morning, chicago that was not enough sleep 😫

aaaaand back on a plane *******, here I come!

bay-gull is how spagenny pronounces it

the tl;dr

so those Meetcutes videos where they go up to people and ask how they met? those aren’t staged, it turns out! fully organic and i can confirm as such 🤭

today’s the towel day, right?

best worded skeet of the day award

btw happy “stubborn-but-always-right asshole” season to all my fellow tauruses! 😍🐂♉️

when my family asks what they should get me for my upcoming 40th

oh this hospital has some cuuuute gays in scrubs who are making some serious eye contact I need to come here more 😅

hey everyone it's lunchtime (EDT)

oontz oontz

someone at NYT was feeling some kind of way today

sad spagenny spadgenny? sadgenny? idk

pro tip: if she’s ever in a show, see it

what’s sad is these days it’s hard to tell what’s a true headline and what’s a joke LOL

Leaving for another work trip tonight and that knowledge has made my whole weekend full of Sunday Scaries 😫

t’s sunglasses were covered with pollen after a minute walking outside, if you wanna guess how my sinuses felt today 🤧

the new hotel room also had a bathroom mirror! groundbreaking!

lol guy online realized I was on same flight so I went back to join him in his empty row partway through the flight and became friends thanks, silly app 😜

all these times going to Vancouver and this Olympics geek finally got around to saying hi to the cauldron this time🏅🔥

it's just math

sure i miss spaghubby and friends and nyc and all but not as much as i miss my matttress and pillows

I've had wonton soup for lunch every day on this work trip Jealous?

work friends all wanna go to a r*ve tonight... do i go or do i prevent hating past me when I wake up at 6 for my flight home?

but I did get to go on a 1.5 hr walk around the city with my gay Vancouver friend on a gorgeous night!