But on the plus side it will limit bellwhiffs like you, attending private school and thinking you're somehow better than others that didn't have that financial privilege. Go fuck yourself, Seb, you utter crawlybumlick.

Swedish writer Fritiof Nilsson Piraten’s gravestone inscription says: ‘Here below are the ashes of a man who had the habit of putting everything off until tomorrow. But in his last days he improved, and did actually die on 31 January 1972’. (📷: jorchr)

In today's edition of 'why are men?'

The Met or Thames Valley police? Which is worst? Only one way to find out

Why don't women report rape, stalking, domestic violence, sexual assault etc? It's a mystery, maybe we'll never find out.

Celebrating international men's day by not cooking him any dinner. It's his day, he can do it.

Hi. I'm the type of person that writes strongly worded emails, now. Apparently.

we heard you were talking shit

Marjorie Taylor Greene has been disliked by the left for years and years and had never had to fear for her life. She's been disliked by the right for 1 day and now has to hire security.

I refuse to lose our Republic to a guy with swollen ankles and a tribble on his head.

Have a great day, all you international men. All you national men, wait your turn.

I'm going to set fire to stuff to warm up. Not randomly, in the fireplace.

It's too cold to be outside and all the cats are mooching around trying to find somewhere warm to sleep. Half of them are always in and they are not pleased about the other half that are usually outside stealing their best sleeping spots. Scenes.

At least Tom has mauled and eviscerated two mice in the hallway 😩

If sexuality was a choice, then explain heterosexual women

I think we should call anyone with a net worth of over $1B what they are: a sociopath

I also have given away a wank to my own hand recently

Companies replacing everyone with AI / companies realising no one can afford their products because they are unemployed.

So, is there a Mrs International Man?

I've come outside into the cold with wet hair. Actively trying to catch my death.

Liver and onions for dinner tonight. The only nice thing about the winter is the stodge.

I thought we were all cancelling Spotify because they're fascists or something, no? Not that I've ever used it. I listen to the wireless because I'm 127 years old.

I've put thick tights and a thermal vest on under my frock. Orderly queue, lads.

To repressurise the boiler, I need a filling loop key. It is not inside the boiler where it should be. I think I'll just use a lump hammer.

Too many to choose from. Anyway the only person I've added to my vengeance kill list today is a woman.

With a dancefloor and disco ball so we could all enjoy it.

I've done all the errands. I'm going to have a hot shower now I've remembered the shower is electric and therefore does not require the gas boiler to heat the water. Obviously I'll die of hypothermia the second I step out of the hot water.

Creeping greed. & DELIBERATE. It's unforgivable because of health parasites. People don't realise that NATIONAL INSURANCE is much cheaper & not parasitical. 'Insurers' are not offering an 'alternative' you are part of the problem. Just like private water private electricity private landlords.

Just the weather to not have heating. I'm so happy.

Good morning

According to Atticus: two idiots sitting on the floor. One falls off.

People coming to bluesky because twitter is broke

I just had an icy cold flannel wash and got into bed, shivering. And then remembered that the shower is electric. I am an actual idiot. #ClubFuckwit

Sorry, I'm lost. Who is the man that is highly respected here?

I'll be rocking the 'greasy pineapple' coiffure tomorrow. Pure class.

Was it a Monday? Monday club £1.99 a pint, perchance?

I grew up in Liverpool in the 80s. We were poor, the area was deprived. It was also very multicultural and we never blamed our neighbours who were also poor and living in a deprived area for the situation we were in. We blamed the government and we blamed the rich. They are still the ones to blame.

I'm having half a pint of knock off Túnel to warm me up* *because I'm borderline alcoholic

As it does every year as soon as it's cold, the boiler is playing silly buggers. Himself, an electrician and definitely not a gas engineer corgi registered or otherwise, is 'fixing' it. This is my farewell post as I am fully expecting to be blown to pieces/suffocated by carbon monoxide in the night.

Jacket spuds and beans and sausages for dinner because I'm cold and I also can't be arsed. Stick to your ribs nosebag, that.

Edgar Allen Poe's death. I really want to know what happened.

There is not a single movie that wouldn't be improved by adding Muppets to it.

Guilty, m'lud.

The people that will do this are also the sort of people that will poison your dog for barking and put razor blades in Halloween trick or treat sweets because they hate seeing kids having fun. AKA cunts.

Matron! He's out of bed again!

Twitter and chat gpt are down. Bad day for people who suck.

The safest, most all-encompassing protest T-shirt you will ever own. Get yours in a range of colours and with FREE UK delivery here >>> buff.ly/yYI3psM

Oh no. If the AI bubble bursts, what will we do for all our favourite… er… all our… you know… the stuff we love and er… no. Carry on. As you were.

You asked so here it is! A virtual ghost tour of Biggleswade via Zoom, with photographs and ghost stories I'll take you on a chilling journey around the Wade from the comfort of your own home! Start Christmas in spooky style 01/12/25 at 7:00pm GMT 1/2 www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/biggleswad...