Our hotel room at Madonna Inn answers that important question: What if Medieval Europe had a pizza parlour?

The no-nonsense energy I’m taking into 2026. A cocktail in a hammered steel glass and a skull notebook in a hotel room made of rocks

Found a statue of a Reply Guy

And Tiny Tim who did not die, indeed, could not die, who endured the curse of immortality, greeted 2026, another year, another mote of dust wafting through the infinite cosmos of ceaseless time *party horn blows*

From my tiny hat to yours, Happy New Year!

Happy New Year’s Eve, a wonderful celebration where we get to wear little hats and yell at time

Spending New Year’s Eve in a hotel room designed by a James Bond villain

In 2026, I'm getting back to weekly posts on my blog, FINISH YOUR MONSTERS. To kick it off, here's a summary of the 8 goals I made for 2025. How many did I accomplish? Did past self help or hurt now self?? To find out, grab your 2026 novelty glasses and read here: buttondown.com/FinishYourMo...

ARTICLE PITCH FOR A SERIOUS NEWS ORGANIZATION: Zohran Mamdani will be inaugurated in an abandoned subway station but can his tenure as mayor succeed if he doesn’t also unmask a ghost, Scooby-Doo style, at the same time?

A TSA agent told me I looked like Benedict Cumberbatch “but in a good way.” I think I would have been more comfortable if the agent had said “you look like Benedict Cumberbatch has been through absolute hell”

I had a very small part in this innovative love letter to horror AND physical media. Support Indie Filmmaking and new voices! Go Go Joseph!

The constitutional remedy for a president who uses collective punishment against people for the crimes of a few is impeachment, removal, and disqualification, followed by a criminal trial.

Working on my new year's resolutions: 1) Only look at social media for 1.5 seconds a day 2) Walk a thousand miles every Tuesday 3) Eat every vegetable in Los Angeles twice 4) Become, somehow, 5 years younger 5) Fundamentally change who I am as a human being on a cellular level 6) Read two books

I'm busy applying to film festivals and planning screenings for our horror film, DEAD MEDIA. If you need/want to make a tax deductible donation before the year is out, we could really use the help to get the film out there. Thanks for all the support! Full info here: filmnorth.org/fiscally-spo...

People on Bluesky have mostly taken this as intended: an absolutely inconsequential joke about pizza shapes. Over on threads, I’ve blocked seven people, turned comments off, and had to do deep breathing to control my anger.

A picture of my wife and I making a beautiful compromise

I passed a woman on the street who was yelling at people to watch out for her dog's waste. But there was no waste on the street. Clearly, a time traveler warning us of future tragedies

Coming out of a bagel place in NYC, was about to dig in to my toasted sesame and cream cheese but some guy roughly snatched it from my hand and took a big bite, then walked away backwards, giving me the finger as he wolfed down the rest (disgustingly). As you probably guessed, it was Kevin Costner.

A fun action figure with a great 2025 vibe

I like end of year best of lists because so much of the internet is a long, running worst of list the rest of the year

Mmm, snowman brains

The Needs Of The Hungry Outweigh The Needs Of The Few Grill & Cocktail Lounge

Scrooge: You there, boy, what day is it? Me: I—I don’t know. It’s somewhere between Christmas and New Years. I think maybe a weekend or a Tuesday? Are Tuesdays weekend now? Netflix just released some Stranger Things, does that mean anything? Is it future? Is it past? Is the sun moving in the sky???

Finally, science has perfected the hubris machine

The key to big stars becoming reliable box office draws again is clear: They all need to release strange vanity albums. “Surprised that Robert Mitchum sings Calypso? It would be stranger if he couldn’t!”

Ironically, when I was watching a Frank Sinatra holiday special last night I kept thinking, “Stephen Miller is a traitor to America who will eventually be held accountable for his many crimes.”

Today I celebrate Boxing Day as I always do: Looking up the meaning of Boxing Day on Wikipedia and saying to myself, "Oh, right."

And then you will be visited by a FOURTH spirit, the Ghost of Christmas Multiverse, who will show you being an asshole in multiple timelines, including one where you’re the only human in a land of muppets

And then you will be visited by a FOURTH spirit, the Ghost of Christmas Multiverse, who will show you being an asshole in multiple timelines, including one where you’re the only human in a land of muppets

May every Angeleno enjoy the gift of Los Angeles Christmas: Traffic levels low enough to safely take a photo in the middle of a busy street

If anyone has an infant who needs some drumming this Christmas morning, I hope this helps

Modern George Bailey would just be happy to see old familiar websites. “Merry Christmas, you old Reddit thread fighting about the best season of the X-Files!”

One of these years, I will make a calendar of cocktail photos and this will be December. Whether you celebrate Christmas or just have a few days off of work, I wish you the gift everyone needs and deserves: just a few minutes of peace on the damn earth

“Rain smacked Los Angeles. It splattered on the palm trees, sizzled on the neon, gurgled down the dirty boulevard. The town was sick. They hadn’t seen sunlight in almost a day. But I had the cure. A fifth of magic and a sack full of cold, hard joy. ‘Ho,’ I said once. It was enough.” -Noir Santa

*And Tiny Tim who did NOT die, although a previous version stated he spontaneously combusted. We regret this error

In a burst of pre-holiday productivity, I finished editing the teaser trailer for our horror film, DEAD MEDIA. I also finished my drink before I remembered to take this photo. I will fix that in post

In a burst of pre-holiday productivity, I finished editing the teaser trailer for our horror film, DEAD MEDIA. I also finished my drink before I remembered to take this photo. I will fix that in post

You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf but—HOLY FUCKING GOD THERE’S A RAT COMING OUT OF THE TOILET

I think it's good to have multi-faceted opinions. For example: -I'm very excited to see Steve Rogers again -The Avengers teaser feels like an artsy Super Bowl ad for Huggies Diapers

Anything can be a Christmas movie if you disassociate from reality

Mickey Mouse’s appearance in “A Christmas Story,” set in the early 1940s… And the nightmare fuel of what Mickey Mouse looked like in costume, back then… God bless us, every one.

A reminder that the fascists who tried and failed (given its circulation on social media) to suppress the 60 Minutes report about the illegal and cruel actions of the Trump administration are the same fascists who really, really want to buy Warner Bros. I hope that fails, too

Uplifting conversation with my Dad today about his attempt to resolve a customer service issue with a big company: "I had to go through the robot three times before I got a human on the phone. I would never hurt another human, but the robots are a different story."

It Happened To Me: A task I put off for 3 months took 2 minutes to complete

Hard to express how much I love this. Twitter is the Nazi site for Nazis. Delete it, ESPECIALLY if you're a famous person or political leader. Abughazaleh does a great job explaining that it's also TRASH and doesn't even let you reach your audience. Get the hell off.

Per NY Times’s Michael Grynbaum on X, this is Sharyn Alfonsi’s email to her “60 Minutes” colleagues in full:

Blank billboards now look like the DOJ is attempting to redact parts of the physical world

ME: We need more entirely original films not based on any pre-existing storytelling ALSO ME: I would like a spin-off about Uncle Billy’s squirrel

"I think refusing is actually the more hopeful, expansive vision of the future than the one that is telling us that the future is already settled and decided. That's my daring idea. Just say no."

You will be visited by three spirits: Fire, martini, and mac n’ cheese