i wander around the dopey-ass streets of minneapolis bare foot screaming at the gods at 4am and never encounter the harrowing reality of stepping on a Meanie-Coded shard of glass like i do in my own damn basement doing laundry first thing in the relative-morning of noon

so i know the bot situation isn't bad enough yet, and it's solely because i haven't broken 1K followers gods help us all if i do

liberals when they realize i'm their last chance for president (APPRECIATE MY ALT TEXT YOU FUCKS)

"why is mina the hollower trending it's just a cute platformer with a-"

I choose death! *slapped upside the head* I choose whatever it is the strongest of us chooses to choose! -F!

Zacharaius Snydariuas is a fucking expletive I can't say publicly and choose not to say privately

"this website is cooked" is a weekly occurrence we love scoffing at but also this Guy Type exists and he's everywhere

so every now and then i check in on that Boruto manga so i can feel something, like a neglected teenager burning theirself with a lighter it is always striking how incredible of a draftsman Ikemoto is, and how fucking terrible he is at telling a story in the medium of sequential panels

You were bred in a lab to be an Establishment Hat Trick, I cannot believe your stupid murderous ass has fooled so many people who otherwise oughta know better

yuri plane

we started reading the news but got to this part and decided we don't really need to read anything that follows

One of you Minneapolis dorks should be down to clown some time; surely somebody in the 612 wants to watch Jojo's Bizarre Adventure on a monday

Something in your head you've been fighting all along

TRUST IN GLUE

in a mod rabbit hole yesterday/last night/this morning and pleased with where at least one of these dead ends got me to

i have a fatal attraction to those cheeks so pinchable

another limp-elbowed gunt you can throw on the pile with the likes of Majority Report and Parker Molloy. the weakest minds on the left continue to acquiesce to "HE'S OUR GUY WE CAN'T SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT-- OMG DO YOU KNOW ABOUT SUSAN COLLINS YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE HER WIN BECAUSE SUPPORT OUR GUY"

jfc am i the only person on this site hesitant about Ossoff that is quite a feed working overtime to glaze him like gods' own krispy kreme

cant quote-post it and shouldn't screenshot but somebody screened google's AI desperately trying to Hello Fellow Kids smoking weed like a scheming vizier (it didn't understand a movie quote) and i just can we throw the men making this happen into a volcano yet we have so many volcanoes

i wouldn't but i would heavily consider pushing him over

WIFE: I told you to call a plumber. ME: I KNOW WHAT I’M DOING.

why is he wearing baguettes on his feet

"a goofy movie": a humble title. why it's not even necessarily "the" goofy movie. we simply, respectfully offer you this story for your consideration "doug's 1st movie": the hubris of icarus. the unbridled audacity to imply that this is only the 1st chapter of the Doug Cinematic Universe. pathetic

Matt is an asymptote infinitely approaching the self-awareness of "Are we the weenies?"

You know, if I wanted to roleplay a social media cop who had to keep things polite, I could make an excuse for heavy handed moderation about those first three things. But "disrespectful" really sticks in my craw. Step-parent-ass crowing on about being entitled to "respect", suck a cunt

we know what youre doing, stop being cowards and name the label what you actually want to call it (its Uppity Trannies thats what im getting at and frankly i wouldnt doubt it if they called it that internally)

A thing about Chicago is that it has an obscenely, impossibly bloody history. Every six months or so during the early-to-mid 20th century something happened that you can’t quite believe, and it’s usually the cops’ fault.

Online is the worst place ever created that unfortunately also rules

i can raise him

gonna prepare a bone pie for anita bryant's skeleton

today's take: everyone who has ever talked shit about the alien designs in Independence Day is stupid and wrong. those designs whip, and are appropriately scary and badass how many of *your* favorite aliens got the chance to choke out brent spiner

wait why didn't Baby Vegeta simply make a moon-substitute to turn SSJ4

if anybody voices us in some sort of posthumous retrospective situation, can it be brian drummond and also please make him scream a lot

okay i was not prepared for the level of emotional stank they put on this episode im not crying ur crying dereshishishishi

if i needed that as bad as i did you sure as fuck do as well so watch it

‼️Look at this insanely perfect shot my husband just captured with his phone. We're both very sad he didn't have a real camera, but this is still amazing.

.............................................................................................................i might have to do this

part of growing, for us anyway, has been obsessively doing mental sweeps specifically for "is this how we felt in our 20's?" and if a given pervasive thought matches that criteria we launch it into the sun best we can

"it is tantamount to physical violence to make a joke at the expense of a child's appearance" is doing a full DBZ world-shattering discourse with a lame "lol kid ugly" post this is so fucking stupid to take this seriously in a way i can't fathom because i haven't squirted out a kid i guess

Natalie Wynn, Graham Platner, and Bad Empanada form a triforce of fake-ass-leftists that represent the major flavors of progressive reactionary bullshit cynicism I am designing an oubliette for the three of them to inhabit

i cannot imagine casually seeing peter thiel in in public and not breaking TOS immediately i also cannot imagine being peter thiel and voluntarily being casually in public they really think we're not going to do it eventually

Male To Male Transsexuals always have the weirdest tits what is happening there

i generally find it distasteful to do the whole "transphobe doth protest too much" thing but if steven miller is a Rotten Egg i would not be surprised in the slightest

If Luigi Mangione could take a bad picture, the billionaires who control the media would have paid anything for it by now.

this is how i feel roughly 50% of the time. 48% of the time, i know what i did. the remaining 2% of the time, i said something that i'm surprised didn't get me banned from this platform too

tertiary people in my TTRPG friend group who insist on using genAI garbage to render our characters: this is the guy you look like in my head except it's worse because i know you're real and it pisses me off

there's a conspicuous inverse circle in the venn diagram between the 'edit button discourse' and 'militaristic alt text people' what im saying is why the fuck dont we have an edit button for alt text attributions