Farts gratia fartis

An airport. Can you imagine the experience

What a fascinatingly shaped head

Kindergarten teacher hated the kids in class who already knew stuff. She flatly refused to acknowledge that I could read. Yelled at me for “just looking at the pictures” when someone else could be “actually reading” the book instead.

HS history teacher in spring 2003 kicked me out of class for opposing the Iraq invasion—just for calmly expressing my view

A teacher in sixth grade (1999) assigned everybody in the grade (70ish kids) to write about a particular book with two days’ notice. About 55 kids couldn’t get their hands on a library or store copy and got Fs. She refused to understand why this was unreasonable and then weighted the assignment more

My third grade teacher was out most of the year on maternity leave (no issue with that, obv) but made sure to do conferences in the middle of that time off to compare me to my parents to the still at large Unabomber, I guess because I had ADHD.

Imagine being too tasteless for Bret Michaels

Millo Vanillo, to me

Garcia’s got this in the bag

Lmao at least write it about Irn-Bru or something else cool

Rory Gilmore isn't autistic, it's just that Alexis Bledel was a bad actor then

Bacon, eggs, grits, coffee, tip

Virgil's getting rehabilitated by the comparison

Taylor's right

Yo girl what them neurons do

I’m just a simple country poster, but isn’t the whole underpinning of the Odyssey that at least one major god is really pissed at Odysseus? Stands to reason his days would be a little drab

I'm so happy for @jimmykimmel.com that he gets to see this

Ang Lee's CKY2K

In-House Counsel Says It's OK

How did the Confederacy get put down last time

Slightly increase a band: 10,001 Maniacs

Who up contracting they hanta

AI is bad, but without it how would we have this image of Mr. and Mrs. Met at couples counseling?

Dang, York has some weird rules for sign design and spelling

You know it smell crazy in there

My kindergarten teacher always used to tell us this

Say a few words from an old TV commercial that some of us will remember: Save today the Tom Raper way!

Taxing the rich is a compromise position

Selfish lover

Fuck off, “a Middle Eastern military misadventure” is at least even-money odds to fuck up any administration for at least 50 years

Don’t want to get too race science-y but I don’t even think the yellow m&m and the green m&m could produce a viable offspring together. Mule type situation, best case

Every year I bet on Mr. Hands to win the Kentucky Derby, and every year I’m disappointed

Happy May Day

Nah, I'm cozying up to William the Conqueror on his way to England. If we become friends I'll get some Lands and live easy

Gonna be riding this high for a while

Canada could make a lot of money selling visa stickers big enough to cover the whole page

Weltenschauung

Leaving aside whether this is tasteful or even of any use, interviewing John Hinckley is a brilliant idea

Phone: I promise you that when I quickly type “and,” you don’t need to autocorrect to “Ave.”

I believe Jodie Foster is on record as having indeed been impressed

klay thompson jfk in 1963 🤝 coming to dallas & losing your mind

*accompanied by organ music* its something unpredictable but in the end is right a gator ate my kid cause im white

Homie what set you from

Shocking development that neurodivergent kids might like D&D

Sheila Dikshit