Why is he posting slutty gym selfies now

- train fucked again - that’s fine I’ll take the bus to the gym - every few stops the driver has to power cycle the bus to get it to move again

Cheetah cubs at the Smithsonian National Zoo in Washington, D.C. experiencing their first snow day. They don't seem too thrilled about it.

My fitbit is like ‘hey did you know you’re stressed and not sleeping well’ and yeah actually I did, even before we talk about the news

This first one makes my brain go whirrrr

The thing about whistle discourse (which luckily I have mostly been experiencing via satire)… have you ever heard a fife. This is solidly within classic American traditions.

Been a while

The primary contact at the customer has a personal emergency and will be unable to meet with us in person, so we are canceling the trip. That I was supposed to leave on in less than 24 hours.

Sir is that your belly button

I don’t know how to react to this

I tried to go to the office today and I made it as far as the subway station before giving up and going home again

I need to be sprayed down with unguents and potions

I got given some of my aunt’s yarn stash to use up and I would like everyone to appreciate what this colour is called

Why is it snowing again.

Don’t just unfollow altnps yourself, explain to everyone you know why you are unfollowing them — because they are leechy, scammy, inauthentic bad actors.

Like I'm sorry that these events all read like a didactic feminist novel but that's not my fault

Hey hey what was this for. How am i supposed to be normal about it.

I’ll go to the gym if they’re open tonight but ngl I’m hoping they cancel

The light at night in the city when it’s snowing like this is so good

"Hi, everyone. I know things are hectic as heck right now, but please be sure to fill out your timesheets every Friday by 5 p.m. Central. I can’t pay you unless I know your hours. Please also try to be accurate."

I heard folks are wondering about the shadowy cabal of billionaires who have been funding handwarmers in the Twin Cities. Stay tuned, we have a new Twin Cities supplies wishlist dropping after dinner! Be the shadowy cabal you want to see in the world. 💓

Man I hope we get 9 inches of snow and not 24, I am not emotionally equipped for 24 (23 cm; 60cm)

Oh I’m psyched

At the end of the day there was one last cookie that no one would take. I LOVE YOU, MINNESOTA!

We were on the phone with the customer at 4pm today and feeling them out for an on-site and the PM was like ‘so are we good? Or do you guys want to check and get back to us?’ No!!! Make them make a decision RIGHT now (That prodded them enough to agree that yeah they’d be good for an on-site)

I love him

Other fun facts: - when any team in Boston wins a championship, their victory parade is in DUCK BOATS

He’s sooooooo cute

Quality performance art. Easy to parse, thematically relevant, kinda gross. Love it.

People keep trying to schedule meetings with me this afternoon and it’s like NO I HAVE IMPORTANT PERSONAL MATTERS TO DEAL WITH

Wooyoung in the middle posing like that, shirt unbuttoned all the way down….

I should probably feel bad for the woman whose laptop went flying across the bus when it room a corner, except the reason she was balancing it on her knees with no hands to keep it steady was because she was using both hands to eat pasta salad

It’s unusual that I work directly on customer projects - last year, talking to a customer weekly and visiting them twice was new for me - and somehow this quarter I’ve been staffed on 3, all trying to schedule kickoffs this week

[nothing I have to say is appropriate]

Asking anyone trying to join the patrol to pronounce Mahtomedi.

Every time an idol posts like this it does give me evil ideas, thanks for asking

Man she just yeets that little dude in

NO

OH NO

It occurs to me that all the folks who are newly hockey adjacent may not know about that greatest of traditions, EMERGENCY BACKUP GOALIE

I converted it to epub so I could read it with a different feel and obviously page sizes have a lot of variance but kindle is telling me it’s 604 pages

Why is taehyung making out with a giant animated frog

This one is unexpected

The wildest temporary detour traffic pattern is ‘one way/one lane, except we’re just going to wave the bus through in the other direction in that one lane too’

Gary Larson: In my cartoon I invented Cow Tools as a cautionary tale Cows: At long last, we have created the Cow Tools from classic newspaper comic Cow Tools

Upon reflection, forced to admit that yes, I earned a bad grade ordering a breakfast sandwich this morning

Important update I have FINISHED harem fic, it is 154K words long and I’m going to put it in a drawer for at least two weeks before finding out if it’s any good

Maybe this should be my FTH offer

@shinkicker.bsky.social I’m fucking dying at broder’s and ingebtetsons being on that list