Ok, so this whole rapture thing. Are we supposed to pack anything? Can i bring my sex toys, and how many pets can i bring? Will i get picked up, or do i have to go to the bus stop? So many questions.

If i were a vaper, this could have been me. 😬

It has come to my attention that it's "bisexual visibility day" today. Here's my proud bisexual face taken during my trip to Iceland. Behave in the comment section, and dickpics may be submitted to the Penis Museum in Reykjavik, rather than to my inbox plz.

Regina Spektor anyone?

(with alt-text)

Ok, i just found the "mute thread" feature. 🤯

The Metallica and Lou Reed fuckup has to be miles above anything else on this list...

Y'all fkn hot. You know that, right?

ISS piss tank seems to be doing ok! What else happened during the weekend?

Presente: The dog who HATES, and wants to fucking murder all men. 2nd date. Friendship achieved.

HONSE!

This is how you ACTUALLY do dickpics.

This Week's Onion Magazine:

Is my cock big enough, is my brain small enough - FOR YOU TO MAKE ME A STAR? 🎶🎵🎵🎶

Me, getting worked up about some "local" political bs in discord: ..... Someone posts a gif of one of my teen crushes. Me: .................................

#OtD 18 Sep 1990 Canadian soldiers and police tried to invade the Kahnawake reservation. Kanyen'kehà:ka (Mohawk) First Nations people who were resisting construction of a golf course fought back, and forced them to retreat after seven hours of fighting stories.workingclasshistory.com/article/1259...

Oh, Come On 🤮

Orange fuckface really officially declared himself a fascist, just now, didn't he?

I bet his dad is a cop, part time firefighter and former astronaut. Not all heroes wear capes. Some wear brown belts. 😆

Having this on my TL sure does help to lighten the mood, cleanse the pallet and makes my feed so much funnier. The world is burning, everything goes to shi.. aoah.. some just drained their potatoes in space!

Man... No words

Tompa 😭

*taps shoulder -does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Fuck being in physical pain. Seriously.

Sometimes bsky gets deep, and touch the real important subjects. 🥹

Nerds debating fish wellbeing is my fav little corner of youtube. There's fighting over what to do if you caught one a lil too deep, and they can't swim back down... I have opinions. Several on how to save such fish, but the one that comes to mind is: It's a good tasting fish, too.

The real sport season is upon us. (I am ofc talking about hockey here). I'd like to share some words or wisdom, to bring into this season: -Winning is not important. What's important is that your opponent loose.-

Overheard this exchange between two nurses: -My wife has put me on a diet. 😔 -Is she your fucking master or something? -She kinda is, yeah. But don't tell anyone about that. -Take the fucking cookie! -Ok, so you're my new master now, huh? -Yes, and you need to lose weight, just not today.

Having a bunch of 20yo coworkers, that you're also "responsible for" can really take a toll on ya. I spent weeks this summer to get everyone to agree on the schedule for this fall. Everyone agreed upon it in juli. Today, on the same day as the shift: "This time doesn't work for me." 😑

They really sold out, didn't they?

Hate me all you want for this, bu U2 is actually good shit.

Fuck it, i'm giving the guys who gets frequently reposted on my TL a follow to see where that ends. My following list is narrow enough that this should result in minimal blocking action.

This needs another lap on the internet.

My last visit to the liquor store, i thoght: Ah! White wine! Haven't had that in a long time. I now remeber why i never buy white wine, unless it's for a fish stock or sauce or something. Just not my gig. Now i need to go buy some shrimp tomorrow and make a soup. Ain't wasting expensive shit.

A man in Washington, DC, plays the Imperial March from Star Wars while following patrolling soldiers. One of the soldiers threatens to call the police.

Remember the old internet, when ppl had theiur own webpage in htlm and had a guestbook? That era feels so innocent and pure, looking back.

Irl grinder, but it's only for ginger dudes. Too bad i'm not welcome. 🥺

Dried booger leprechauns need to go. Serously. World wide problem, that spands class/race/ethnicity and something we could all probably unite on. Get them out, build that wall!

It has come to my attention that i need a ferret.

😭

Big sad rolling in like it's a weather.

This one pic of my old horse, Akriva, is for @prairie-druid.net 🤠

I'm not durknt! Yuo ear! @thehumanstrobe.bsky.social @pretty-vulgar.bsky.social

Knees be the sexiest body part of women.

Having a "friend" that is an editor of a magazine is not always a perk. (Yes it is my but, and i will stand for it, but also - THAT IS MY ASS)

For some reason, i just came to think about the first time my mom caught me masturbating. She made a brief comment about "full mast" and "i'll be back later". Dad also walked in on me an my high school love once, commented "oh, the bouncing butts", shut the door and audibly laughed.

Joinked this from the "discover feed". Couldn't find the OP (sry), but this is now living rent free in my head.