Motherfuckers be motherfucking.

@governor.ca.gov -- I don't think suing trump is enough. I literally want you to go to places physically to protect Californians. Like, this is ridiculous. I don't think ICE would arrest a governor.

Not to brag, but I'm really great at swallowing pills.

I gave birth to my daughter in front of my whole family, part 2 open.substack.com/pub/claudial...

D(e)ad is mentioned in rolling stone. Nbd.

Yo our movie deadthefilm.com is going world wide. Me and @jonathanschmock.bsky.social will be doing Q&A’s in London, Amsterdam and Berlin!

If you live in these states, your ACA premiums are about to jump: SD - Up 235%
LA - Up 150%
WV - Up 387%
WY - Up 382%
TN - Up 320%
MS - Up 314%
AK - Up 346% Republicans are fighting to make sure this happens to their own constituents.

I made deadthefilm.com with my daughter, @izball.bsky.social @vicmmic.bsky.social my mom, my stepfather, my partner, @jonathanschmock.bsky.social Craig Bierko, Eddie Pepitone, Nick Marini -- we're distributing ourselves with Laser Webber People like it!

Personally, I don’t like it when a guy’s eyes, nose and mouth are all scrunched together in the middle of his face. Not hot.

Song recommendation of the day. open.spotify.com/track/4tlIxK...

When I read my horoscope and it says bullshit like, “this week may be challenging, treat yourself gently” I feel like the universe is just making excuses for not being nice to me. Like, YOU treat ME gently, universe.

DAILY MEMO: Feds Abduct At Least 23 Workers Today, Highest in Weeks If you appreciate reporting like this, please consider becoming a monthly or yearly member of L.A. TACO so we can continue to bring you this vital information. @eltragon.bsky.social

Still fuckin great. Daryl Dixon: Book of Carol

open.substack.com/pub/claudial... and now I’m on Substack

not a single fuck was given, not a single apology made

“Disney is run by human beings. Some of those human beings are cowards. Those cowards don’t want to be named and shamed, and if you do that effectively, they will shift their behavior.” - @ezralevin.bsky.social Cancel fascism and reinstate Kimmel: indivisible.org/government-c...

Hear ye, hear ye... there's gonna be 2 new showings of "D(e)ad" at DYNASTY TYPEWRITER 9/21 and 9/22 PLUS a Q&A with me, Izzy and Jonathan Schmock about our scrappy journey from my ex husband dying to now it's a movie! deadthefilm.com

Seeing people see “D(e)ad” is incredible.

Hear ye, hear ye... there's gonna be 2 new showings of "D(e)ad" at DYNASTY TYPEWRITER 9/21 and 9/22 PLUS a Q&A with me, Izzy and Jonathan Schmock about our scrappy journey from my ex husband dying to now it's a movie! deadthefilm.com

Guess we’re gonna find out who the pussies are.

I am actually sad to have to say this since I have admired much about Disney CEO Bob Iger over the years, but what a profoundly quisling move this is by someone who knows better. It’s shameful and he has tarnished his once proud reputation.

Not really an overstatement to say that the test of a free society is whether or not comedians can make fun of the country's leader on TV without repurcussions.

the "D(e)AD" show at the gramercy was so much fun!

Brooklyn is sold out but there are tix still available for the gramercy 9/16 at deadthefilm.com

Both sides are NOT the same.

Just fire 'em. Involuntary ejection, or something. Just fire 'em.

Any news organization with a shred of decency would fire Brian Kilmeade immediately. There is no gray area about this.

I’m sure the keystone cops will find the shooter.

President Trump has ordered American flags at half-staff after the deadly shooting of conservative activist Charlie Kirk—something he did not do when Minnesota State Rep. Melissa Hortman was assassinated months ago. trib.al/VwZm4tn

No one can convince me that Skyler Gisondo is younger than 45.

When I read stories about "the rich" freaking out over Mamdani, I'm, like, what the fuck do they have to worry about? Go live your life!

I love soft things: soft tee shirts, soft skin, soft secession....

Yo @governor.ca.gov — do this. Get us our vaccines please. These fools are trying to kill us with their bullshit.

Okay, so I just found out there were literal barrels of crackers. Here I was getting confused that people were defending some kind of pejorative stereotype they used to say on Hee Haw or something.

I actually don't think I've ever seen a Cracker Barrel, and definitely not a cracker barrel.

The DSM has now been replaced by A Course in Miracles.

Hey, the CDC just opened up a cool gift shop! You can get candles, incense, some witch stuff, a wizard's cap... let the shaman know your symptoms and he'll prescribe the proper crystals!

A really useful offering: "Trump’s Pentagon is drafting plans for a military invasion of Chicago. The people most at risk—unhoused people, trans folks, Black and brown people, disabled people, and immigrants—need more than our fear and indignation. They need robust networks of care and defense..."

The fucking CDC is gonna look like the back room of The Bohdi Tree bookstore. They should track down that tarot card reader guy from 1985. (This post is specifically for LA elder millennials and above).

I made a movie with my daughter @izball.bsky.social , my boyfriend @jonathanschmock.bsky.social my son in law @brennanleemulligan.bsky.social also starring @vicmmic.bsky.social my stepdad mark lonow, my mom joanne astrow, Eddie Pepitone, Nick Marini and CRAIG BIERKO (the craig bierko) info below!

questions I wish I could ask a conservative: what's your favorite movie? Why? What's your favorite book? Why? What's your favorite band? Why? What's your favorite TV comedy? Why? What's your favorite hour long? Why?

Like, what I want is Viola Davis to call up the Suicide Squad of the democrats, progressives, socialists, literal communists and go to town. I want Karl Urban to get The Boys together and bring Vought down. (Nerd alert here).

Re Gavin Newsome: we need more assholes like him right now. Like, I'm ready to join the "Punch Them In The Dick" party. Like, I want the sneakiest, pettiest most low down motherfuckers in the world to get together and ruin some GOP representatives' day.

I wish one of these Republicans at his Town hall would be honest and say, “listen you babies, you voted for Trump because you wanted to be lied to and sold a vision of racial supremacy, and that’s what you got. You don’t get medicine or rights or low prices. You get to pout.”

Case in point

Woke up this morning thinking, "Boy, AI would've made Chandler Bing really nervous about losing his job as a transponster."

I just want to say, I can't think of one republican I've ever wanted to sleep with. Not one.