pov you let me drink two (2) alcoholic beverages at your wedding

looking like a fancy dog (non pejorative)

I just want to watch someone eat the entirety of this abomination

I’m not paying for my bras until I have a pic of the delivery guy holding them up

never let my enemies know that one bite of lettuce or kernel of corn is my biggest weakness. or post it online as a challenge. cone at me.

25th anniversary of the cancellation of Strangers With Candy

the James Garfield mini series absolutely slaps

jewish psychiatric social workers for mamdani work is going to be oppressive tomorrow but internally I am so fucking happy

oops got too tipsy at the rehearsal dinner and fell into a candelabra

This is so dark but I have tried to hold out hope that the couple getting married in LA this weekend break up with enough notice that I can go to ink and dagger in Philly.

I consider the year I spent at skidmore college trapped in a double with a roommate who only owned, and repeatedly played YELLOW SUBMARINE and the THAT THING YOU DO soundtrack nonstop, situationally induced psychosis

You know a lot of people are telling me, Mr. President the ribbon around your neck is the most beautiful I’ve ever seen but we never see you without it. They’re saying we need to know, we deserve to know what you look like without it. It’s true. But I’m not gonna take it off. Maybe I’ll take it off

I only need to keep dissociating for 3.25 more years and I want to thank the hard working people at love is blind who continue to pump out this shit for helping me continue in that endeavor follow up: what the fuck is going on with Denver

ink & dagger playing Philly on Halloween (the most me coded shit ever) but I have a wedding that day in LA. I have never wished for a relationship to fall apart before but guess there’s a first for everything

nobody ever brings up that Jesus was a Capricorn

it only took one night at the screamo fest to give me a sliver of hope of coalition building and community it was immediately ripped away shortly thereafter by a guy who insisted on showing me his sketchbook at gwarbar for the next hour

both my spouse and my best friend saw me eying a blue curaçao scorpion bowl drink for 6 people served out of a watermelon and said MICHELLE ABSOLUTELY NOT and I demand a new best friend and spouse

wonder how this guy’s day is going

A lot of lone nuts with no coherent political philosophy seem to be very closely related to one specific political philosophy

We need fugazi now more than ever

BLITZER: Now we’re getting reports that one of the bullet casings was engraved with a message saying that if you are reading the casing, you are gay. We must warn our viewers we’re about to show the photo and don’t know at this time whether the engraving is what makes you gay or if it just tells you

If all my friends called me a pedophile in my birthday book I'd probably kill myself too

I can’t believe there aren’t more online spaces for me to discuss the most absurdly bad gameshow I love to hate watch, Tipping Point and share the intricate fictions I have made up about host Ben Sheppard outside of the conversations I have had with @rigamarock.bsky.social

vacation in 2 pics

It's Minnesota State Fair time! It's time for Minnesotan folk art! Here, for example, is Saturn Devouring His Corn, in the seed art category!

long day full of lots of sad people with sad problems. Time to unwind by watching American Experience feature length documentary INTO THE DEEP about the 1820 tragedy of the whaling ship, The Essex. honk if I’m relatable yet

trying and failing to ascend to the level of caffeinated necessary to navigate four 12 hour days of work in the mental health mines.

keeping calm and just looking up what the Magdeburg Unicorn would’ve looked like

Tweeting just the headline about your own son is CRAZY

I need whatever the urgent care version of therapy is. like nothing acute just let me vent for a sec.

@rigamarock.bsky.social nothing is funnier than tipping point’s host get angry when someone doesn’t know an EastEnders question

when I was 15 my best friend & I went to friendly’s on LSD because we did everything on LSD. I ordered mozzarella sticks and saw a worm on my plate and stared at it as it creeped around the slice of lettuce garnish very confused if I was hallucinating or there was actually a worm

is there a Frances Farmer Eill Have Revenge on Seattle about Orlando?

I don’t know how I got here but now 4 episodes deep on a furry true crime documentary. I deserve this.

I think we’ve devolved low enough to present my worst business idea - a dine-in hibachi style dominos

my 70 yo MIL is watching love island UK and drunkenly leaned over to the couple at the table next to us at the restaurant that “she’s punching” which is … not a compliment.

just gonna keep posting the Chili’s booth boots

to the person who booked 9PM: I have been working 11 hrs & no longer have the capacity to give a shit about you/your problems after 8:30 PM please find a meaningful geode & blame things on planets being in retrograde until I can reboot whatever executive function lets me nod at people for 11 hours.

bring her back is such a good movie. absolutely yes.

the show the gilded age is for guys who jerk off using Monopoly money

thank you cap’n jazz

sadly this is a true thing that happened but a client had anxiety about a thing she heard and asked if Jews control the weather My earnest response was “if they do I’m pretty fucking mad they haven’t let me get a spin”

I am from Queens and my husband is from Manhattan and his close family friend was Roger Angel and this Mets Yankees series is exactly what I needed in my life

if we are gonna have all the old diseases come back I’m voting we also start add “bout of melancholia” into the DSM VI revision

killing Medicaid is fucking classist eugenics and its time for the peasants to fucking revolt

My 6 year old niece embraces her BDSM polycule

This is all a distraction from gambling. Keep gambling