Pie szn has begun. If my family isn’t thankful for me this year so help me.

If I ever talk about moving again, someone please remind me how miserable it is.

Good morning only to fans whose teams are still undefeated

Kirshner come here I just gotta say one thing

Might have to change my lock screen 😂

Tough ass fucking team

This teams got that dog in them. Gig em.

10-0 and never a doubt, fuckers

Run the turnover play

Aggie football can’t hurt me Aggie football can’t hurt me Aggie football can’t hurt me Aggie football can’t hurt m

Oh good god

Look I know we all wish A&M wouldn't win a championship. But last time A&M won, we beat the Nazis. Now we need to beat the Nazis again, so it's time for A&M to win again.

If Elko wins this, honestly do extend him forever and pay him whatever he wants

My god Aggies

Fuck these refs

What if we hadn’t shit the bed in the first half. Imagine.

Shavings make piles

Professors at Texas A&M required to obtain prior approval from administration to discuss this half of football in class.

MARCEL REED STOP THROWING IT

How a look today 🤝 how I feel today

AHahahahhahahhahahha what the fuck

In hindsight, this isn’t as good of a time as I initially anticipated. It’s actually pretty bad.

I’ve never seen a game this disastrous

There better not be a single chair alive in all of Kyle after half

Run the turnover play here

@refs I just wanna talk to you

Shane Beamer is such a fucking dork.

I should have stayed in Florida, this is my fault 😭

Oh

I’m not having a good time.

11AM kick offs in God’s time zone > noon kick offs on the east coast

Officially a Texas resident again. Yeehaw!

Just crossed the state line into the Motherland. The stars at night really are big and bright. And all my exes really do live here.

Good morning to fans of 9-0 teams

Now that that game is behind us, it’s time to focus on rivalry week. I have nothing but hate in my heart for those BASTARDS in South Carolina.

ELKO FAKE PUNT LETS FUCKING GOOOOO

This time next week I’ll be watching football in our new home with my parents and siblings and I’m so excited I can’t stand it

Holy

My new favorite thing to do is to make people really uncomfortable when they say shitty things. Yesterday some coworkers were talking about how crowded Florida is about to get with NYers. One guy said something like, “and rightfully so, it’s so disrespectful to ppl who were there for 9/11”.

What’s he look like? I’ll be the judge of this.

Writing about Elon Musk’s pay package without leading with this is like profiling John Wayne Gacy’s booming party clown career.

It's not in this article but the government asserts that the sandwich was thrown at "point blank range", which implies subway sandwiches have defined effective weapon ranges of varying lethality, and I would like to see the government's chart of these ranges.

Football god is punishing Arkansas for something. Probably Bobby Petrino.

You know what ponies, hell yeah

Just checking in to report the ESPN app is hot trash

Aw man Vandy

Does Texas rush the field today or??

Fun fact: colleges with a one-eyed collie mascot have never lost a football game

What are we doing without the YouTube TV quad boxes this weekend? Hulu?