Feel ill after reading Olivia Nuzzi profile, will now put laptop in giant steel sarcophagus like they did with Chernobyl just to be safe.

"You call that corruption? I'll show you corruption." — Doug Ford, presumably

Thought this was a lovely, poignant bit of writing by my colleague @gbayliss.bsky.social www.thestar.com/opinion/cont...

Here's a thing I wrote for @thestar.com:

He has no earthly idea what happened last night or why I’m sad and hungover this morning, which makes me less sad (if no less hungover). Go Jays.

We are Toronto we luxuriate in misery.

Life is a meaningless tar-pit of misery. #BlueJays

Max Scherzer is ageless. He is the Pitcher of Dorian Gray.

Fun fact: nothing you achieve in life will ever look this fucking cool.

Dork-ass take.

“Smarties” should not be pluralized when there’s only one in the damned box.

Drake, 10 years dungeon, no trials.

Tonight’s strike zone:

LOSS ANGELES.

Snell ya later!

Further study reveals that “Toronto Blue Jays” is an anagram for “joyous talent, bro.”

“Los Angeles Dodgers” is an anagram for “draggled looseness.” Do with this information what you will.

The East Wing has learned its lesson. by Susan Collins

A Jays playoff game and Leafs opening night? Guess it’s time to pour myself a tall glass of navy-strength gin and take my spare liver out of the freezer to thaw.

A startling start to the day: my bleary eyes just misread "Trump wants to invade Portland" as "Trump wants to invade Poland."

First they came for the Socialists And I did not speak out Because I was a centrist Then they came for the trade unionists And I did not speak out Because I was a centrist Then they came for the centrists And there was no one left To explain that it wasn't *really* fascism

Big news (for me): I’m delighted to say that I’ve traded in my contract position as an opinion editor at @thestar.com for a permanent one. Please join me in congratulating me.

Name one thing John Tory accomplished during nine years as mayor of Toronto challenge (IMPOSSIBLE) www.thestar.com/news/gta/joh...

I wrote this. www.thestar.com/opinion/cont...

Doug Ford giving out code names: www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_7t...

I REPEAT

Holy shit Leafs what the fuck

There are no longer left-wingers, right-wingers, and centrists. There are only progressives, regressives, and cowards.

It’s genuinely difficult not to feel hopeless when conservatives make everything worse all the time for everybody and yet keep getting elected. Fuck.

I hate this goddamn province. www.thestar.com/politics/pro...

I, too, barely know what I think until @jm-mcgrath.bsky.social puts it in writing.

They should pit him against Trump during trade negotiations: "The Art of the Deal" vs. "The Deal of the Art"

Ditching Nate Erskine-Smith in favour of Evan Solomon, who wouldn't be the sharpest knife in a drawer full of spoons, seems not ideal: www.thestar.com/politics/fed...

It's no coincidence that there's a city in Ohio called Toronto.

Hating on rival Canadian hockey teams was once A Part of Our Heritage, and this Leafs fan believes it should be again. For @thestar.com: www.thestar.com/opinion/cont...

There's nothing worse than Microsoft Word *correctly* predicting what you're going to type next. It's like Clippy popping up to tell you your work is derivative.

Meanwhile, in Quebec:

Eternal question for the Toronto Police Service:

happy new Propagandhi day to everybody who loves sick ass riffs over righteous lyrics

Leafs almost pulled a Poilievre this series but were unable to screw up so comprehensively.

You can’t win a minority series here boys, let’s get at it

Having gloried in seeing the Bad Blue Team lose in Ottawa last night, I am excited to watch the Good Blue Team triumph against Ottawa this evening. Go Leafs go.

Canada right now:

The time is now, guys. Stay angry, but don't blow this: www.thestar.com/opinion/cont...

Get out and vote, Canada. Remember: open.spotify.com/track/4uKMHi...