'Rachel, I'm telling you as the only person I trust, I am actually a genius detective who is amazing at detecting things and knowing who bad guys are' Ahahaha haha. #TheTraitors

Lmao poor Stephen looked absolutely rabbit in the headlights terrified at the execution #TheTraitors

The thing that really fucks me off about govt bodies, companies etc acting like 'We need twitter to communicate with our users' is ... if your users have twitter, then by definition they have internet access. Put that shit on your website. They'll go there if they need to.

I'm far from a Zack Polanski superfan but I do enjoy how he posts screenshots of unhinged rightwing screeds about how he's a threat to Western civilisation saying 'lol cope and seethe bitch' and a link to joining the Greens.

It's so interesting to compare Kim Petras's 'I'm So Good At Sex Honest You Guys I've Definitely Had Sex' album with Robyn's 'I Don't Give A Shit Just Fuck Me' vibes.

I will always tell the story of the little girl in Waitrose with her dad. She was maybe four? She had a balloon. It was dragging on the ground. He trod on it and it burst. I thought 'Oh no, poor thing, she's gonna cry.' She looked at her dad and said 'Why is it always you?'

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller Wednesday, January 7,1948

Stephen is obviously doomed so I'm really looking forward to Rachel and Fiona fighting to the death to be last Traitor standing while the Kirk v Spock fight music plays #TheTraitors

Jessie and Jack collaborating on a skull tower 😍 #TheTraitors

looool Rachel really thought she did something there #TheTraitors

Leave Jade alone! #TheTraitors

So much for red herrings #TheTraitors

I had the horrible realisation that I have to believe I'm unattractive - which I do, and have made my peace with - because if I'm not, then there have to be other reasons I never date or have sex and I am not at all prepared to unpack that.

Okay but why is the chick in the foreground with the yellow top, why is her head on backwards?

Relevant to your interests @beardynoise.bsky.social

Strong Hilda Hilda energy

Watched the first episode of The Summer Hikaru Died last night and ooooohh I think I love it, like a lot.

It rained last night so the snow's gone and I was like yay I can finally run but it was still frosty and slippy as fuck and my foot nearly went out from under me like five times so I only did about a mile but I figured it was better to stay upright

Honestly the thing that pisses me off most about all this bullshit is them all trying to claim 'compute' is a noun.

Look at the replies to this for the absolute pinnacle of bad heterosexual emojis and response gifs. It's like a fucking seed bank keeping them all safe for future use.

I need someone to watch this so I can talk about Mexican Sexalissa www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-wx...

It's probably long enough that it's started to slip out of people's memories so JUMP SCARE! of Rihanna's unsettling carbon monoxide poisoning fever dream video for the Smurfs song she did.

You don't want the onion rings

"I went on Twitter and I saw all these terrible posts" Oh fuck man really? Did you also go to the dump and find a bunch of rotting food? Why are you making it my problem now.

Awks......

*mishearing you* a cheetah in the white house????!!

Big fan of the guy who donated £5,000 to a Graham Linehan fundraiser at 8:39 am, 8:43 am and 8:45 am.

Look tbh it still works WE’RE SHIT, QUEER UP

The evolution of Steve Harrington, Busy Mom With A Spiked Baseball Bat, is far and away the best aspect of Stranger Things.

I think we underestimate the vast numbers of people who want to talk to brands and, like, Ellen Degeneres.

[To the tune of Eleanor Rigby] 🎶🎵Emmanuel Macron Rules over France By the side Of his much older wife What a good life🎵🎶

Holy shit this sounds amazing. All ice-creams should have at least three (3) different crunchems in them.

Jean *would* disrespect Tommy like that.

There's something wonderful about the specific phrasing of 'it fell into the lorry'. It's like 'a bigger boy did it and ran away', or something a Victoria Wood character would say.

We must always provide the Great Rabbit with his sacrificial carrot lest his secondary maw consume the moon.

FBI: International is interesting because the shows are normally so gung-ho 'ra ra ra! America number one!' but this has plots like 'The US got dozens of people murdered in Afghanistan by accidentally giving the Taliban names of civilian supporters and is now trying to disappear a whistleblower'.

Watching a psychological thriller starring Jackie Woodburne (Susan from Neighbours but you should really know that), Kym Marsh and Dannii Minogue. It only has four episodes. This couldn't be more My Shit.

Replace it with the Drag Race shady rattlesnake noise.

Stomped past a straight couple gingerly picking their way across the icy, snowy ground and the guy said 'How is he moving that quick?' My dears, the homosexual walking speed is not to be arrested by mere trifles such as a frosty slickness underfoot.

To avoid drowning in a sea of 'let people enjoy things' I'm just gonna say I'm glad that those who liked the Stranger Things finale liked it.

Canada's Drag Race making the queens struggle with big book-learnin' words on cue cards is so mean.

Same energy

The only thing I want is for Jade to outlast Amanda #TheTraitors

Jessie and her Rude Dog eye make-up ❤️❤️❤️ #TheTraitors

I could never go on #TheTraitors I think because I would be so mad if I got murdered. I'd happily be voted off at a round table so I could have a 'You fucking idiots, you sheep, you're being led by the nose, I'm a Faithful' moment. But murdered? Nah. Fewmin'.

Jesus Christ, you expect nothing from Keir Starmer, you assume you'll get absolute dogwater miquetoast equivocation, and he *still* disappoints. (From: www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/c5...)

Can't wait for the US to expand its 'US police can operate in other countries if we feel like it' policy and send me to a black site for not having a Truth Social account.