I'm so mad that everything is touchscreens now. we must return to the glory days of toggles, sliders, and knobs, where each function was clearly delineated with a different motion or feel

i hope you get what you’re after

why do

nausea 👏

i’m not scrolling, i’m ingesting data

inventing new things to be worried about

dreamt i was in a hotel room in chicago that was in the middle of lake michigan. it was one of those extended stay type rooms with kitchen appliances, but every time i tried to use one it would malfunction and erupt in green smoke

movies

work is canceled today so i will be enjoying COUCH

i am watchful for the variables

my therapist just praised me for getting all of her “is this statement fact or opinion?” questions right in the same tone you would use on a toddler who just identified colors correctly

using calamine lotion as blush

hiro murai directed this wushu daydream youtu.be/IxGDNRE-2c0?...

the worst dish i ever washed in my food service career was a plate filled with crumbly muffin leavings and finger nail clippings 🤢

the Big Feelings industrial complex

dreamed about going through a rough breakup in an entirely dream based relationship. and then about a demonic cat

do not email. me at night

i’ve caught up on just enough laundry to lull me into a false sense of security

bangs too long, throwing off the whole mullet ratio

cool that my body’s response to “having plans” seems to be the equivalent of being pursued by a large predatory animal

creating an enormous homunculus from babybel cheese wax

yeah that’s what i figured

i shed too much to be kept indoors

what is this feeling

used a new toner and my skin has been peeling off like a layer of dried elmer’s glue for a couple days

listening to joanna newsom while on a treadmill hits different

5 years later and i’m still thinking about this message

i will gladly feast from the friendslop trough

coworker used ai to produce a dogshit unintelligible ui and then came crawling to me for help fixing it 🙄

had to spend an hour with my ex husband yesterday and it put so much into perspective for me. i used to feel like i didn’t contribute much to group conversations and for the last couple years i thought maybe i was just becoming more socially confident. nah. turns out he just never shuts the fuck up

howdy

just had some of the bad shit i’ve been worrying about nonstop for weeks actually happen and for some reason it’s the calmest i’ve felt in a long while

i hate when i haven’t seen a mutual on my feed in a while and then suddenly a post of theirs shows up and it’s really self deprecating bc i feel wrong for liking it! i don’t want them to think i only like when they’re mean to themselves ahhhhhh

shaking my head disapprovingly at all the bad and stupid people in my life

they should invent plates that explode after you eat off of ‘em

how i'm trying to be

I placed a damp tea towel over my head and experienced INSTANT comfort and relief!

my favorite shirt developed an armpit hole 😭 rip to my thrifted color block masterpiece,

maybe forgiveness was the wrong choice

The reboot of Dante’s Inferno is gonna have a ring of hell just for people who QT with no like

purple shampoo doesn’t do shit for my hair but it sure does make my nails look dingy and gross

my emotional sliders have all been adjusted to the pms setting

discovered that the little dog absolutely loses her shit if i sing. gets the zoomies and goes berserk

i’m ren

watching my brother’s dogs while he’s out of town. the little anxious one has never been exposed to stairs before and is squealing after each step 😭

i thought labubu was how the french say bubonic plague

fucked up and asked someone what topics they like on their pizza

nowadays they don’t make fanciful questions