Call me a narc. Call me a square. But driving that train high on cocaine is irresponsible.

Feel like the Bills only play on Sunday night

No clearer sign we are going to win than ICE literally pissing and shitting themselves

You’re not my real dad.

The funniest thing about this is how legit terrified ICE looks.

yea this mfer was notoriously woke

I know you did not set out to build Twitter 2 and you certainly did not want to run Twitter 2 unfortunately Twitter 1 got taken over by a nazi so here we all are, this is the product now, sorry about that

imagine being down the shore in the 90’s and telling people that HBO would have a Delco expanded universe. they’d call you a witch.

Starship Troopers right before they get eaten by the bugs

this will heal me

GEORGE! WHAT’S THIS ABOUT CANADA HAVING BASEBALL?

I think it’s pretty neat Canada keeps kicking our asses.

lmao

I sit alone in my four-cornered room, staring at candles, thinking about the Phils missing breaking ball after breaking ball

Should have never been in the position to lose but that was a dreadful and embarrassing finish that makes the NFL so much worse than it should be.

1:30 left on the clock is plenty of time to go four and out

as far as I’m concerned the franchise ceased to exist after Utley left

if you are at the game you are obligated to do a citizen’s arrest on Kevin Patullo

wizard leading your party celebrating after you successfully steal the rune shield from the wood troll’s lair

Eagles Country, Let’s Ride.

need the birds to make me forget the phillies exist

Urkel Haaland

They’re going to put me in jail for the things I said about Grealish

Ange mate why did you leave the beach?

best part of yesterday for me besides the Mathys redemption arc was the Leeds supporters pooping their pants behind Mo’s chair celebration

spiders in the laundry things are going great

Sono diventato il burlone

Nick tie the game and save our democracy

I need Mark Sanchez to stab me

Harper not getting a ring going to be a real Philadelphia sports tragedy

Shit!

How about a grand slam, as a treat

getting PTSD seeing them swing and miss at breaking balls in October

whelp

Vibes are getting poopy

Get your Rx checked Muncy 😏

Need to get the top of the order hitting by any means necessary. Raw milk, colloidal silver, Rodgers and Hammerstein do whatever it takes.

The Irritable Bowel Xtreme 7th

He put 100k down on going 0-4 tonight

that was a fucking strike lol

I hate playoff bullpen shit

Ohtani’s cheating no other explanation

Dave Robertson is Jamie Moyer’s dad. That’s how old he is.

I don’t how but this is RFK Jr’s fault

Irritable Bowel Xtreme intensifies

The IBX patch stands for Irritable Bowel Xtreme

Do Not Show Me David Robertson At This Time

Goddam it that was a pitch to hit if it hung just a millisecond more