It’s crazy when you realize in real time that someone is dumber than you. YOU! The biggest moron on the planet!!! Ay-ai-ai

Sorry

You guys cut a burger in half? I like to cut a burger in half.

Just a note to any and all spiders that can read this rn: please don’t get on me. Especially not in the dark.

Bad news, everyone. I like One Piece now. So far it’s only the live action show but I’m going to the doctor later to see how bad it is. Might sub to Crunchyroll idk.

Gonna play with my pokemen for a couple hrs. Come through. www.twitch.tv/razorlou

He looks like Krang’s Body going on a date.

I’ve started saying “tits” when something is awesome and lemme tell ya, it is NOT being well received

I’m watching “Underwater” with Kristen Stewart and TJ Miller and holy hell this is a great horror movie!? Does it get bad halfway through or something!? Why haven’t I heard of this?!

Omg these guys are obsessed with me 🙄 taskandpurpose.com/news/army-en...

Dear, Algorithm. Please show this post to people who also think they’ve added too many characters to the Progressiverse

Live 2 Vape. Don’t Vape 2 live.

I want to like Delicious in Dungeon but it’s too horny for polite viewing. They should make a perved-down version of most anime shows for when you are at your inlaws.

My goofs keep going viral on Threads and it’s starting to affect my self esteem :(

Oh no Pokopia is incredible! Oh noooooooooooooo!

Live on twitch with more Resident Evil Requiem. Come get scared! www.twitch.tv/razorlou

Wanna see the scariest part of Resident Evil 9 so far?

Reggie Dinkins is funny, Strip Law is funny, TV is funny. I hope we get to keep making it.

Remember in the Simpsons when Cyprus Hill hires the London Symphony Orchestra, possibly while high and then they do a little of “Insane in the Brain” together? I bet that album would be incredible…

Truly incredible how many times I have to learn some lessons. Like, just bc you worked hard on a thing doesn’t make it good. Which is ok! That just means you get to work harder!

I feel that, in the year, 2026, we should have figured out a way to make dogs live forever. Even if, and I want to make this absolutely clear, even if it is against their wishes.

Just discovered that “Saitama” autocorrects to “Santana” on an iPhone and I’m fucking DYING at the prospect of this being how some Weeb learns about post-menopausal fuck jazz.

lol, I put this cartoon I made on Reddit and people are downvoting and it’s cracking me tf up. Like “now that’s TOO many apples!…”

So, are we cracking jokes over here or mostly just smoking cigs and busting on douchebags?

Watched it, liked it, Tyra comes off as an absolute reptile.

I hope they release the Alien Files and I hope they prosecute every alien in them. Even the liberals.

Getting some weird side effects from my vaccine. I woke up just now and I love doo-wop?

I don’t like it when there’s too much cinnamon in a thing.

Comedians will be like “being 35 is crazy.” No it’s not: Drink water, eat fiber, don’t freak out if your teeth bleed.

I have a small cut on the roof of my mouth so that’s what I’ll be doing for most of today.

Weaknesses: Constantly quoting the Simpsons regardless of context or necessity. Strengths: I’m the biggest man in the world now. And I’m covered in gold.

2026 is the year I finally become one of those squirrel-suit glider guys; zipping and dipping through natural rock formations, challenging fate, pushing the limit, sticking the landing. Also I’m ripped. Huge hog.

So, I checked and we don’t HAVE to apologize for being white any more but you still get half off a small Wendy’s Frosty if you do.

The state-sponsored chocolate from IKEA is incredible

I SWEAR I didn’t

Oh shit! Is this the uppance? Is it coming?

The kids are alright, man. Some of em. The drunk ones…

Just finished it and I’m back to thinking Welcome to Derry is good. Don’t even know who I am anymore.

In one of those bars where two dudes are getting drunk and telling stories about times they were either tough or straight. None of which are very convincing.

If America were a person it would 100% not be allowed to legally own guns.

-SEEKING TRADWIFE- Must have: Hands Feet Tusks Tail At least an Associate’s Degree

They say you can’t swim in the pool if you have explosive diarrhea and I am here to tell you that you can. Maybe a little faster tbh.

Ok, first of all what’s wrong with being a sea witch? Spells need casting in the sea, and suddenly that makes you evil? And secondly of all she didn’t STEAL anything. She Purchased Ariel’s voice at the cost of giving her MAGIC LEGS. SICK OF THIS SHIT. #justiceforursula

Does anyone know a good plumber? There’s turtles and mushrooms and spicy flowers coming out of the toilet. My nephew ate one and can now spit fireballs which is helpful but like ARGH!!! Who’s gonna step on all these turtles!?!

About to live-skeet Octopath Zraveler 0 while flying to Costa Rica for my honeymoon: my quest to make the most alienating content imaginable… continues.

“Luncheon Meat”

Omg it’s so cold out that I almost puked. What the fuck. Ow.

Somehow more bald and hairy than ever.

Ok so I just watched Ernest Saves Christmas and absolutely no disrespect to the man because he did but like BARELY