thank u apple for making this chaotic collage of all the basketball related photos on my phone

god forbid a white girl catch a lil “let’s go mets”

god i love clothes

slowly getting better at remembering birthdays😎

feeling so blessed having big biceps and fat titties 😇

i just know there’s gotta be some fellas in berlin that were clubbing all night and went straight to the nfl game

god i wish i was shaking ass in a club right now😭

you know the motto

unironically imo one of the best game soundtracks is “I MAED A GAM3 W1TH Z0MB1ES 1N IT!!!1” and if u haven’t played it, ur missing out

titties are still riding high but just took my first pic of them post op and i looooooove them so much

devastated to find out about the closing of the college bar i got into simply by holding my real underage id sideways

god i wanna go to an eli escobar romance thursday once i can do stuff again

woke is so back

zohran will bring a world series title to the mets

i would’ve rather the blue jays won but it’s hard to hate the zestiest team in baseball

in honor of 750 followers here’s a team fortress 2 clip since i know y’all only follow me for my gaming clips

bowling photo day look (switching into a different top for the picture)

hey republicans i have a message for you:

more skin more pins

i like silver over gold because i’d rather come second

you can unfollow me but you can’t un-let’s the go mets

somehow pulled off both an impressive yet embarrassing eco 3k

You use your clout to get followers on social media, I use my clout to get my friends into the club for free, we are not the same

dick chainy had to make it through one final locktober

zohran will bring a world series title to the mets

Just an overall great night. We're so back.

there are many reasons why i am a cool person to be friends with but one of them is that i am a secret base patreon supporter so i get to see jon bois documentaries before they hit youtube😌

fuck wildman whitehouse all my homies hate wildman whitehouse

i bless the rains down in unova✨

more skin more pins

i brought her edibles yesterday too, friendship and supporting the gals means doing more than just saying it!! i will stand on this business!

real community is driving a 2 hour round trip to give bestie who just got her face done her shot so she doesn’t hit a bruise on her stomach

sugar free red bull is a super food

the one perk to scrolling reels all day for the past week is that my algorithm is SO fuckin dialed in right now, just banger after banger

my managers at work dropped off a care package for my recovery🥹

whenever i hear “bo bichette” my mind immediately jumps to boba fett

“Honey I Transed the Groom”, for Zero Chill: Bridal Trash

oh shit i’ve had $17 in my draft kings account this whole time???

goddamn i wanna eat some solid food so bad

when i get lasik it’s so over for you bitches

i would love to play center field when a no-doubt 430-foot home run is hit and run into the outfield wall at a dead sprint. as the camera cinematically pans up to follow the ball you briefly see me in the corner of the screen absolutely eating shit

just because i’m not seattle-posting doesn’t mean i’m not still thinking about moving there - mark my words i will live there in the next 5 years

tell me why i’m watching the world series with my dad and he just turned to me and goes “you know there’s a 50/50 shot i die in the next 20 years”

happy halloween i’m kevin the sea cucumber after he got his lips stung

i can’t wait until i’m back in the good ol days again

saw an instagram reel that 2020 is about to be 6 years ago and i shed a tear

sending dad on a mission to get some wawa cookies and cream milk

im gonna crash out if i have one more pureed lentil soup or ensure

i can see like 6-7%

DO NOT flirt with mrs. met within earshot of mr. met