What if Chekov made the whole play out of the gun

I figured out why B's sleep (and therefore mine) is such a mess. It's time to switch to one long nap instead of two short ones. So that one has to move later so it's evenly spaced between waking up and bedtime. This part is going to suck.

I'm having very serious back problems tonight. Muscle spasms, pinched nerves, can't feel MY ENTIRE RIGHT LEG, random quick stabby pains just wandering around my body as the nerves misfire or whatever. And let me tell you that the fireworks right outside my office window are NOT FUCKING HELPING

The weird buzzing in my head that I realized a few months ago is specific to PPD (while dealing with it for the fourth and final time) seems to have finally stopped? Maybe? I haven't felt that in a couple of months that I can remember.

I miss the great American tradition of not thinking about the president constantly.

The way B gets so excited by the dread when he's waiting for us to pour water on his head to rinse the shampoo...I think we have a future horror fan in the house. (Plus he loves jump scares and Halloween songs.)

I feel like a fucking hostage to all the neighbors' noise this weekend (okay, every weekend, but it's especially bad this one) At this point I should get a refund on my rent for it.

[food] Damn it, I was looking forward to having roast beef sandwiches on my lunch break because I'm getting burnt out on ham, and those are the only two lunch meats I like. But the small tub of roast beef costs about the same as the big one of ham, so nope, I'll just have to eat ham.

Mom and stepdad, just any and all '80s and '90s country. Randy Travis, Garth Brooks, Reba McEntire, etc, etc. Dad and sisters, mostly '80s hair bands, a little bit of pop. (Including sisters because they were already adults when I was little.)

[food] The meat experiments will continue until beef prices improve. Tonight's was beef & pork blend for burgers. (I know a lot of people just do that regardless, but I hadn't tried.) Verdict: 9/10. Could have used a tiny bit more seasoning, but otherwise barely noticeable.

I'm sure there are funnier things in life than when babies fart themselves awake and then panic slightly, but idk what they are

B's big playpen is still in my office until we figure out how we're switching things around now that he's not hanging out with me during work. And after a week of 2-3hrs of sleep a day, climbing into it and taking a nap sounds awfully tempting

B went to the doctor yesterday. She's happy to fix his lip tie (it's scheduled for next month) and also his tongue tie while she's at it, which I don't think is affecting eating but she wants to cover all the bases, so that's fine.

can’t believe a narcissist is being so publicly humiliated by a reflecting pool

I was under the impression that the reason I had to wait a month for approval to move to night shift was because of the shift differential and the budget. But apparently not, because I'm still getting exactly the same shitty pay as before, no extra.

B is having a really hard time with me being back at work after I was out last week to take care of him while he was sick. So now ~no one~ is getting any sleep. Especially him tbh

It's midnight and 95°F. My AC has still not recovered from the hottest part of the day when it just gave up (which it does every day around 11am)

I should not have gone back to work tonight. My brain is still foggy, and B wasn't ready. He refused to go to sleep for M, only Mommy. So I had to keep running back and forth and I've barely gotten anything done and I just feel like I'm failing everybody. Should have taken off again.

So... panic stations, my laptop has stopped charging. The battery hadn’t even been an issue, maybe we got a power surge overnight in the heatwave? But am now on emergency mode. So if you would like a pendant: oishiny.etsy.com Or wallpaper: ko-fi.com/turtleofcalm... Now is a good time!

$65 needed now to get out of this hole! Thank you all for helping! Cashapp/Venmo: showupforthis

I felt better so I cooked dinner (yes it's 2am, leave me alone) and by the time it was done, my fever reared its ugly head and now the last thing I want is food

Character is simply an asshole: I hate this guy Character is complexly an asshole: I love this fucking guy

B's cough is about 5x worse and now it's productive but he doesn't know how to actually cough it up and spit it out. So he just sounds so miserable and keeps waking himself up coughing, and I can't give him any medicine for it. RIP my sleep.

Wishing whoever is setting off fireworks close enough to rattle my windows at almost 2am a very long, unpleasant night in the emergency room.

I'm actually looking forward to Monday when I go back to work and we can get back to our routine. If that doesn't scream that I made the right call switching to third shift, idk what does. I've dreaded work for months and now I'm back to enjoying it, at least a little.

Every software update now is basically just, "Here's a new way we've made our product more irritating and less accessible." "Oh, and here's an AI thing. No one asked for it, but you're getting it anyway."

I smell toast. I would be worried except for three things. 1. It's 9am, a perfectly normal time for toast. 2. I can always smell the neighbors' food from my bedroom for reasons I do not understand. 3. I can smell *something*. My sinus infection is on its way out.

I would really like to go back to sleep but my ears won't stop ringing

love how every app has to periodically inform me that push notifications are disabled. damn bro who do you think did that!!! history's mysteries

B has a double ear infection to go with Mommy's sinus infection. (They probably started from the same cold or whatever.) Antibiotics have been called in.

A sick baby, and a sick cat, and a sick me trying to deal with all of it. I am not having a good week AT ALL

B's fever is barely anything now, but he has only had about 10oz of milk today, zero solids, and maybe 1oz of Pedialyte. I'm scared he's going to end up in the hospital again.

M went to get me fast food for dinner because it's gonna be a long night and I just want some chicken nuggets. So he gets to the window and they say "sorry, we're just waiting on the fries." And almost 10mins later, they finally give him the food and he comes home, and there are no fries. 🤬

The cat puking his guts up is exactly what tonight needed. Perfect addition to a sick baby, me with a fever, and M taking forever at the store.

As a kid you think life is gonna be all “Dig through the ditches and burn through the witches. I slam in the back of my Dragula.” But then you get older and realize that it’s just “Do all the dishes and cook all the fishes. How’d I hurt my back and my scapula?”

B's fever has come down, but he's refused to drink anything for about 9hrs, and in this heat that has me very worried. He won't even eat anything besides dry cereal, so I can't sneak liquids in that way either.

When your friends are playing a game you probably won't play.

I have a fever + the baby has a fever and refuses to lay anywhere but directly on me + hot flashes + the air conditioner told me to fuck off about 12hrs ago and it's still 6° hotter than it should be even though it's after midnight = 3 fans aimed at my bed from 3 different directions

Today is my anniversary. We didn't have plans anyway, other than me going to work (which I'm not now) but a sick baby was definitely not on the agenda

Special thanks to my shitty landlord for replacing our AC with one that basically nopes out when it gets over 100°. We live in the fucking desert. I've spent the last 3hrs trying to figure out if the baby is sick or just too hot.

Just a thought but if all you want to do is cosplay being a novelist, you don't need AI. Just put on your crappest sweatshirt, make a cup of tea, open Word to a blank page, then go on Bluesky for the rest of the day, and you're sorted.

M went to the store earlier to get baby formula and a couple OTC meds. He swiped my HSA card to cover the meds, and debit for the formula. Except I looked at the receipt and it did it backwards. It covered the formula and not the meds. I have no idea what happened but it's $20 more in my bank acct 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's 108° and I'm making chili. But: 1. It'll help my sinuses 2. The crockpot won't make the house as hot as the stove would

I miss when this kind of crap was satire.

I don't think I've ever found anything as funny in my entire life as B apparently finds apple cinnamon Cheerios. Just cackling every time he puts one in his mouth.

It was worse than I thought. Rent is paid, but now I have $30 to my name and we still need gas and groceries. I think $150 would cover the basics. I would really appreciate any help. PayPal.me/brokenqueene CA/V: brokenqueene

I can feel the insides of my ears. Thanks, sinuses, I hate you

We were talking at work about how bad the latest software update is. I said AI probably wrote the code, and one of my coworkers said "nah, it was a human, AI wouldn't have messed it up that bad." Oh. Oh, honey. No.

I don't know why I'm so much more tired from working later when I'm still going to bed at the same time and getting the same amount of sleep. But I am even more exhausted than usual. Hopefully I'll adjust soon.

Ruining my own day by checking the weather forecast and seeing it's expected to hit 109° Saturday