We've entered into "decaf tea in her bourbon supply" stage. Zero regrets, she just came out "feeling funny"...yeah, mom, you downed 4oz in under 2 hours and you're 115 pounds, you're drunk.

You could still get your coffee from a local place that's working ten times as hard and was probably queer-friendly all along.

You know what's really satisfying when you're having a shit day and in a foul mood? Answering some of the 20 scam calls a day my mother's phone gets.

I am absolutely available for this and I would do it for the sheer joy but I suspect I would be far more in demand if I charge $5000/hr for it.

Happy "chrome got a native vertical tab bar" day!!!

Skulls and flowers. Stoneware. Hand-built. Surly.etsy.com

[shocked pikachu.jpeg]

So hungry for more Taskmaster I convinced Jay to watch Bäst i test (Swedish) to enrich my tattered Swedish

I think mom startles awake from a deep nap and gets up and starts moving before her brain actually comes online. Today it was "did I sleep here last night?" and "whose house is this?" 10m later she's fixing a broken nail and conversing reasonably but my nervous system will go on for hours.

Fuck it, Nicole Kidman made me mad enough to go ahead and sign up for training next month.

Our new album is out today! A sincere request to help spread the word!

She worked for Trump and Pence for 4 years. She’s running as a Dem in a new district that should be reliably Dem. This is a ratfuck and everyone should recognize it as such. Let these resist grifters WHO ARE REPUBLICANS rebuild their own toxic ass party and please don’t give them any money.

Somebody give me a FRACTION of these people's cash so I can actually train and do this job rather than whatever this is.

GAHHH got the fuckin' Cryptkeeper in my mailbox again. I don't know how I got on Chris Pappas' mailing list but escort yourself into the sun, buddy. That's a "report as spam" for you.

This is so just messy awful you have to assume Target has been stealth-purchased by private equity.

Lobster doesn't have any flavor except what it's dipped/dressed in.

I know I haven't poste for a while but there are reasons for that. This being one of them. We cant bare the thought of him going to a vet, which he is terrified of. So yeah. www.gofundme.com/f/give-a-pea...

Did you know Buttondown will migrate your newsletter *for you*? It's amazing.

Oh hey speaking of guys who are problematic pieces of shit who shouldn’t be near an office of power

That's 100% why I created leavesubstack.com -- got tired of re-hashing the points; wanted to make a simple 1-pager.

I just made myself a sorta home version of a Taco Bell chalupa and it was exactly the medicine I needed. What do we even call that? A taco so white it's invisible?

how adults colonize every third space and remove young people — including the Internet link: dragon-in-a-fez.tumblr.com/post/8134647...

The worst part: mom's half awake, doesn't know where she is and calling out, will probably be fine in 4 hours but who knows?? All we could really say is she's safe, go back to sleep.

CAN YOU PUNCH IT??

who is us?

Here's the thing: Democrats already know who can win. They know which policies are popular with voters and which candidates are vocally in support of those policies. They're going to throw a billion dollars into trying to prevent those candidates from becoming the nominee.

Just remembered that yesterday the "registration person" came into our ER room and asked if my mother's "ethnicity" was "American" and I shorted out briefly before going "uh sure!"

BeCAUSE they are pieces of shiiiii-iiiit.

Having a brief -what are we calling it these days? A "menty b"? On the porch now.

Hello, I made you a feed of your cats watching the Artemis II splashdown bsky.app/profile/did:...

If it were me, my first words to the recovery crew would be "moon's haunted."

Even mom perked up to watch that. She's regaining her sass so I think she's gonna be okay. She's had a bag of fluid and potassium, waiting on final tests.

Man idk how to express how demoralizing it is to see people doing joke support for the Pope as the Catholic Church implements the most draconian trans healthcare ban anywhere in the US. It's a FULL ADULT TRANS HEALTHCARE BAN!!!THEY KEEP BUYING MORE HOSPITALS!!!!!!! Moreover, ICE must be destroyed

Mom's feeling weird. Just had a visit from EMTs, heart is okay but BP is high. Driving her to ER ourselves.

House-hunting is stressful on a bunch of levels, especially when you're trying to find a place that's least likely to kill your mother, but I am enjoying the part where every time we look at a house I say "let's find a coffee shop/restaurant in the neighborhood and check it out!"

"Your sleep score was a 76 because of the time you were awake." Does the apple watch ever really mix it up? Like "because of the dragons" or "because you disappeared for 73 minutes"?

I never tire of pointing out that multiple shows did "Oh, my old friend is trans? That's interesting!" episodes in the '70s and '80s, and while none of these hold up by modern representation standards, they're all quite good and accepting in a way you might not expect.

But he is also aggressively shitty to people who aren't vegan, (not Vegan), and I can't forgive him for doing it to science communicators randomly having Thanksgiving Day on Twitter.

Brandi Carlisle, Alphaville. "Are they gonna drop the bomb or not?" youtu.be/cIQXpfHtGdA?...

Holy shit you can feel your brain trying to violently free itself from your skull every second you try and watch cable news

Tonight I got to put my mother on the toilet for the first time. SHE has already forgotten it, and I will have it burned into my nervous system until I get dementia.

Massacre upon massacre in Beirut in the last hour. AUBMC announced a “code disaster.” Over 100 airstrikes in 10 minutes across the country. One hit right behind my house. Sirens ambulances & the smell of sulphur. The city is in total chaos the people in complete panic

Just received a USPS priority mail envelope containing a manilla envelope containing the bill fo sale for mom's car. COMPLETELY WET. Like...someone held that shit underwater until it soaked all the way through. On top of two completely dry pieces of mail.

I feel like they're trying to tell us the moon's haunted.

Just cryin' at the moon.

(working late thoughts) of all the crap I've bought to self-soothe with lately, I have to say the heated shiatsu back-neck thingy is actually a real winner? (more or less like this one nekteck.com/products/nek...)

At least go stand in front of one of their warehouses and ATTEMPT to get this on TV instead of farting around here about it.

Their attire should be "not anywhere on the premises."

Keep going. Save yourself.

OOF chills, Pitt fans: Isa Briones and her father singing the lullaby Dr Santos sings to the abandoned baby www.youtube.com/watch?v=oa0g...