Fuck everyone in this venue. Especially me.

You're gonna have to be more specific than a person who insulted me in a comment thread.

Tiger Woods must have a car crash fetish. Like the good version of Crash.

When I'm elected governor of wherever, I will replace english with latin in all schools. Sometimes the old ways are the best ways. Only english will be impacted. All other languages will be welcome.

Deonna Purrazzo and Lee Moriarty should face each other in a Pure title unification match.

Zayda Steel and Isla Dawn should fued indefinitely.

The obsession with which match main events Dynamite is interesting to me since the main event is usually one of the weakest parts of the show.

Settle a debate between my wife and I. Should a chamomile replacement be called scamomile or chamfauxmile?

Did I hallucinate this?

Is Jey Uso's speech always incomprehensible?

Happy opening day everyone. It's very weird that Netflix used their time travel capabilities to broadcast Sunday's Giants Yankees game on a Wednesday.

Unless you work for ICE.

She refuses to French braid my beard no matter how much I beg.

My wife just French braided my hair poorly without me even having to ask.

I managed to avoid watching any sports on Netflix but those bastards had to choose a Giants game for their fake opening day.

If Kenny Omega beats Swerve he should use his EVP powers to give Swerve's nickname to Brody King. I don't know why he didn't do that in the first place.

If Hangman isn't there the crowd is going to be terrible again.

The main difference between CM Punk and "Hangman" Adam Page is that Hangman's grievances are focused on his opponents rather than his current or former employer.

I knew the NBA was going to make sure the Kings don't get a good draft pick as soon as I realized they were tanking.

Congratulations everyone. We did it.

Is anyone else worried about that Fresno crowd ruining Dynamite again this week?

I think we all know where this is headed.

For what it's worth, the two biggest Harry Potter fans I have ever known are terrible, terrible people.

In his 1992 novel Snow Crash, writer Neal Stephenson coined the phrase "Metaverse" to describe a VR world experienced through goggles. Now, Stephenson says he no longer believes face-worn computing is the future: “People don’t like wearing things on their faces and don’t trust those who do.”

In the years since his fued with CM Punk "Hangman" Adam Page has become CM Punk.

The real reason WrestleMania is struggling to sell tickets is that there aren't any rumors about Sting being there.

we're freeeeeeee

Hangman died a little inside when Swerve won the title.

I used to email wrestling media people pretending to be a confused an concerned WWE fan asking questions about their reporting. One time I emailed Mike Johnson a question and he went off about how if I think he is a liar I should fuck off. I never suggested he was lying.

Normal lies normalize normal eyes.

A bunch of people have blocked me in the last couple of hours. I'm pretty sure it's because I made a joke about Dave Chappelle being imaginary.

WWE is obviously desperate but desperate enough to have CM Punk and Roman Reigns fuck at WrestleMania?

MJF is a bad person on purpose.

This should be a wrestling gimmick.

So it's Dustin Rhodes' fault the crowd in Fresno was so horrible.

25 years ago one of the worst things to happen to American pro wrestling occured

Most of the discourse about "Hangman" Adam Page and his promise is missing a key point. MJF only even cares because of how performative Hangman was about the Diddy thing. That is how petty this situation is. Nobody should care except MJF.

AEW fans love to compare bald people to penises.

I was already wary of Netflix broadcasting the Giants opener and that was before I knew that Anthony Bowens could have been involved.

This is my social media strategy.

Why doesn't anyone compare Tommaso Ciampa to a penis? He is bald.

If I was a basketball player I would have my ankles surgically removed so I wouldn't have to worry about injuring them.

As a white man I can confirm that this is true.

if i were an NHL player, i would simply put the puck in my opponent's net and not let my opponents score in my net

Timothee Chalamet reminds me of Shia LaBeouf.

young dumb and full of tums

The person who attacked Toni Storm is the same person who attacked Mercedes Mone and Moxley. Whoever it is hasn't debuted yet.