Limited edition Sex & Sewing Machines leather bondage cuffs & tie, handmade by me. Look cool, feel better! Go wild! djewisexandsewingmachines.bandcamp.com/merch/leathe...

A little something for the feet fans on #BandcampFriday. djewisexandsewingmachines.bandcamp.com/merch/leathe...

It’s Bandcamp Friday and I have limited edition Sex and Sewing Machines merch ready for you! Have fun! djewisexandsewingmachines.bandcamp.com/merch/leathe...

Would you rather watch amateurs puke in the bushes on New Year’s Eve, or slip into some limited edition Sex & Sewing Machines merch? #BandcampFriday djewisexandsewingmachines.bandcamp.com/merch/leathe...

@urbanedoc4kids.bsky.social this groove www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHM4...

It’s Bandcamp Friday and I have limited edition Sex and Sewing Machines merch ready for you! Have fun! djewisexandsewingmachines.bandcamp.com/merch/leathe...

They're ready! Going live at midnight for Bandcamp Friday holiday bonanza.

Stax Records 💙🇺🇸 www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWh3...

Now we’re takin’. This requires WAY MORE athleticism than doing push ups without a shirt on.

I’ve been busting ass since 1am, it’s been a productive morning. Next up, I’m going to paint my nails & drink a glass of champagne. See?! There’s an upside to being an independent contractor. You get to control your schedule.

This is the kind of stuff that used to happen at the Kennedy Center before that dickhead took a wrecking ball to it. 🇺🇸 www.youtube.com/watch?v=qz2e...

My friend Corn Mo is in this band. This video is incredible. www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxD_...

Man, I’ve had a *day*. 1. Monster teaching from 4am. 2. Had to deal with being called a bitch at my day job. 3. Finished the Limited Edition merch that’s coming out on Friday. I’m shutting down shop early & going to bed early.

All that's left is serging the ties.

She tried apologizing in the parking lot just now too. The board president was there as well. I was *hard* on her. I MADE her tell me who she meant to send it to. She tried over & over to not say it, & I was fucking relentless. I told her, “well, we’ll see if your behavior improves in the future”

We’ve all been there, raccoon. Nothin’ a little hair of the dog won’t fix.

😂 She’s now realized that she really, really needs my help so she’s trying to apologize. It doesn’t work that way, lady. You call me a “bitch” and now I am *done* with you. No backsies. I don’t put up with that shit.

Just got called a “bitch” for doing my job. So good luck getting the water shut off, lady. I’m done with you.

BEHOLD!

We’re disappearing 6yos. Great country

Fluent 8yo boy: “What is the snake’s favorite class?” Me: “Hmmmm what is the snakes’s favorite class. I don’t know!” Boy: “HISSTORY. Do you get it? Because snakes make a hissing sound.” Me: “Oh I get it now hahahahahahahaha!” I made money listening to his joke. 💰😂

Makin’ that money hunny! Next up we’re learning voacabulary: grasshopper, mosquito, dragonfly, bedbug 💰💰💰

This is one of those songs I sang by heart into my hairbrush when I was like 7 years old. Gotta hand it to my parents, they let me do it. www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4zu...

Limited edition merch hittin' you on Friday!

HALP! I'm trapped in bed!

Looks like they had a confetti blast sometime before this song. It’s an amazing performance. www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KYb...

Cheap America fuel only sizzle like wet bluejean!

"Buy Russia Fuel! It explode good!"

Hitting kids is wrong & does lasting damage, so of course the christians are all in on it. This piece makes the argument that this should stop 👍

Another day, another theft from the culture they decry every day.

Filed under: no shit, Sherlock

Oh look, more Russian fuel goes kaboom 💥

The teaching platform I work with has a curriculum called “Super Phonics” & I love teaching it, it’s like teaching music.

Our best friends get it right 🇬🇧

I can’t stand yoga, but they went and found a new way I can’t stand it. Chickens in diapers yoga? Nope, no thanks.

Time for another glamorous day in the life of an independent contractor.

Time to get hype for limited edition merch comin’ at you on Friday! isitbandcampfriday.com

Gross. Get a better hobby, dickheads.

Girl, you ain't got enough MILES of thread for the mofo's I need silencing 😁

This schedule of mine LOL. I’ve already put in 8.5 hours today. Time to take a break 💨

Today, we rivet.

I got your back on 1 man capacity tents. Also, is there a motherfucker in your life who needs their lips sewn shut? Send 'em my way!

Been in a shootout & need a bullet removing? Rival gang knife fight & need stitches? Audrey's your gal! (No questions asked, cash only)

Lisa’s really great. This is totally fascinating. www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Wse...

This magnifying light has changed everything. It's sooooooo much easier when you can see. Whoulda thunk it?

┏┓ ┃┃╱╲ In this ┃╱╱╲╲ house ╱╱╭╮╲╲ we love ▔▏┗┛▕▔ & appreciate ╱▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔╲ Tittie Freedom ╱╱┏┳┓╭╮┏┳┓ ╲╲ ▔▏┗┻┛┃┃┗┻┛▕▔

Give it up for vaccines!

The moose are doing their part. www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADdp...

Getting closer!