Wow Chris Olsen's cheating bf dating Andy now????

they just added another one, stay safe everyone!

How was the cheating can be diabolical? Did he cheat on you with a ouija board?

SSD - Slutty Sexy Dick

This suggests building walls out of cum

How do I get rid of the lower abs fat pouch?😭

My favorite pic on this app

People are desperate for tangible things that can’t be taken away by greedy billionaires. CDs are cheaper and more portable than vinyl, and a greater portion of the money spent goes to musicians compared to the pennies provided by Spotify and Apple Music.

you guys are all really horny on the days when i’m trying to lock in

The devil’s new lettuce got him

that one grindr profile that keeps sending you messages for months even though you never respond:

Mood

I forgot that I have unopened package of lettuce in my fridge from last week. It’s green and fresh but does it have that diarrhea thing?

Is this the right place to post this?

Y’all have no idea how much this guy has me on chokehold

Oomfie canceling me:

Me after getting plowed:

me as a kettle next to the tea waiting for the pot tell me something:

I need more oomfies for stirring the shit and tomfoolery

Katy Perry - E.T.

that’s what he said

Is that why that is called transreceiver??😭😭

that fart power turns into thrust power. Maybe, we will get more tops out of this lettuce cyclosporia thing. 🫠

Let’s watch the world cum together! cup*

Cryler, Chrysler, Merry Chritmas, Merey Chrysler

Just remembering again… that one memory… before coming out, I thought drag race that everyone was talking about was this😭😭😭:

Me if Austin Butler was gay and into me

And I’m not gonna track my car so obsessively for the rest of the year (gas expensive)

Protein pow-pow bam bam clap clap-der.

Yet boomers are still winning?????

Guinness beer or world records? 🤔

My dumb hot straight college roommate in the kitchen before he mistakes my ass for his girlfriend’s at 3am:

I’d like to fall in love in a hopeless place

Accidentally, finding myself replies to potentially nasty stuff nongay accounts. They about to cancel me😭 I gotta be careful

Considering how AI is designed to please you and say yes to everything humans say, we all should be rude bitches to prove that our Bluesky accounts are real humans. Get rid of them captchas. 🤡

You show the lights that stop me turn to stone. You shine them when I’m alone

Me beating my meat instead and cancelling my hookup because he said he doesn’t use a bidet.

Does 3D printing work for dildos?

*guy I’m on a date with is super high maintenance* Me: *calls the Divamergency service* Glambulance: 911 what’s the tea sis

All them open-relationship couples couldn’t even move the numbers up. We lost to fucking boomers. 😭😭

And I’d love to have a Theo James *ba-dum-tss*

because them gays couldn’t prepare the salad safely. Probably, they used the Turkey baster for olive oil but Jack also used it for douching an hour before🤡

Can’t travel due to being overworked and underfucked this summer? No need to go to Bali. We have Bali belly at home 🤩🤩🤩

hey, remember: don't eat anything and don't breathe

Me: Don’t eat salad. Me to me: But due to the Cyclospora, instead of 2 lbs, you are gonna lose 15lbs and hit your weight goal

oh he’s in his ariana grande bag. good dick means more good music

Why when you get off work, everywhere is CLOSED????

Salad Diarrhea?