Something to think about at half time. Would you rather eat a Declan Rice sized grain of rice or a grain of rice sized Declan Rice?

Going through some old magazines my Mum gave me and this gem was tucked into one. #cryingeagleemoji

Just look at how cool my Dad was as a teenager in the late 50s ❤️

We've lost the art of making movies, we've strayed too far from Old: the beach that makes you old

Drag King name I just thought of but probably already exists: Noah Vale.

No offense to Mr Paul Williams or Mr Kermit The Frog but I don't actually think there are that many songs about rainbows and what's on the other side. I can think of one. I'm sure there are others but don't think the claim that there are "so many" stands up to scrutiny

I may be very biased but my Dad was the absolute coolest.

Been distracting myself from my grief by searching for vintage My Little Ponys to add my collection. Unfortunately I missed out on getting Spunky the camel (heh heh heh) and cried for an hour. Why can't these Vinted sellers understand I need 40+ year old plastic toys to let me mourn???

I'm watching Don't Breathe 2 and it's unfortunately gone down the M3gan 2.0 route of trying to make the villain of the first film the hero. But at least with M3gan she was just a poorly programmed doll and not a man who rapes people with a dirty turkey baster full of cum.

Spotify...Where is Big Beat???

Next month I'm having to move house a week after my Dad's funeral. So 2 of life's most stressful events happening in a short time frame. But jokes on you universe I'm not married so you can't hit me with a divorce to make a triumvirate of miseries!

My Dad looking like he wants you to join his "community collective" ❤️ #servingcultleaderrealness

Last night I had a dream that basically just consisted of me recounting the plot of the film Rockula to someone.

My Dad died suddenly yesterday. He was turning 84 this month but is one of the fittest, healthiest people I know so we have no clue what happened. They're doing a post mortem. It doesn't feel real.

Since first hearing about it the other day, I’ve been all about the annual church service for Grimaldi, The King Of Clowns, where loads of clowns dance on his musical grave and then recite The Clown’s Prayer. So I thought I’d look it up. Thanks Google. #Thoogle

Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether they could, they didn't stop to think if they should!!

One of my unpopular food opinions (along with hating sourdough because I don't want my bread to be sour) is that I hate the relatively recent hyping of brioche buns for burgers. I don't want a sweet burger. Grump grump grump.

Doing this but for 5 films my Mum took me to see at inappropriately young ages: Pi (11) Dancer In the Dark (12) Mulholland Drive (13) All About Lily Chou-Chou (13 or 14) Lilya 4 Ever (14) Also at home she rented Leaving Las Vegas when I was 8 or 9. Thanks Mum!

Unsure which is more surprising, the fact that Finland had a pop magazine called STUMP or that the Fast Show's Jazz Club presenter (you know, the one who says "niiice!!") appears to have actually existed

Can't even enjoy a wee bit of cheese without judgement 🙄

Top 10 Beatles Songs 1. Mothers Little Helper 2. Lonesome Cowboy Bill 4. Hole in my Shoe 3. Hello, I Love you 5. Shine on you Crazy Diamond VI. Little Wing 7. I’d Love to Change The World 8. Me and Julio Down by the School Yard 9. 8 Miles High 10. White Rabbit

Wes Streeting seeing his 4% polling.

Just incredible. "Don't assume gender critical people hold negative attitudes towards trans people just because they want to eradicate them. That's stereotyping!"

Someone please give me £250 so I can this and add to my OK Soda obsession. Please. Come on. I need defunct soda merchandising! ebay.us/m/YzBoTS

The way nobody reacts, the music continues and then it's dragged off 👌 10/10 no notes 📹 ➡️ Eren Chen

Re-watched The Wicker Man again and it's still a masterpiece. But...Howie my dear, you think a child is going to be murdered on this day and you're really going to go have a wee nap?

A fellow Labour Party member once described Wes Streeting to me as Zippy from Rainbow if he'd been radicalized by Mumsnet. which is a very specific set of references but also disturbingly accurate.

Have had to do a bunch of boring admin and shredding today and to make it less insufferable I've been imagining myself as the secretary gremlin

Absolute Beginners mentioned. My Bat Signal.

Is there already a conspiracy theory along the lines of the "aliens built the pyramids" one but about Atlantis? If not I propose to start one based entirely on the premise that everything in Donovan's song was historic fact. #Letusrejoiceandletussinganddanceandringinthenew Hail Atlantis!

In my current kitchen the hob is on top of the oven and as said oven has a touchscreen I quite often turn it on with my belly when stirring a pot or something and it feels a bit deliberate at the moment so I have no option but to conclude that the oven is fatphobic #logic

My friend that won the Bafta is throwing a big party to celebrate but other than me and 1 other friend everyone coming actually worked on the show. So we're debating claiming we contributed and feigning offense that noone remembers us. Steal that Bafta valour.

Apologies to the lovely woman from the Green Party who came to our door canvassing yesterday and got spoken to through the ring doorbell. I'm terrified of human interaction and my boyfriend was topless and felt it would be inappropriate to have a conversation with his nipples showing. #votegreen

It's so horribly unfair that insomnia is a symptom of M.E./Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.

I'm sorry Magical Mystery Tour but you're coming across as a bit clingy. Hoping to take me away is one thing but dying to is just a bit much mate. #iaintrollingup

My friend just won the baftas for production design!! I'm so proud and happy for her 😭

It's important to remember that, yes, sometimes good things still happen. www.dailymail.com/news/article...

I'm not a fan of Harmony Korine's films but I will forever be indebted to him for making one of my favourite ever TV moments possible: Louis Walsh furiously asking "What is Gummo??" on the X Factor.

Mr Mercedes probably has the biggest nose dive in quality between series 1 and 2 I may have ever seen. The first is a good and grounded detective thriller. In the second the criminal has developed psychic powers. Oh Stephen King you just can't help yourself can you? 😔

It still amused me that when Silent Hill first came out censors in Europe and Japan thought the grey children (first picture) looked so much like a real child they needed to be removed but were totally fine with the Mumbler (second picture) replacing it.

Boastful Quaker Oats ad, Chicago 1891

Bluesky why do you always think I'm writing in German??

I really need someone to make a film of Riddley Walker cause it's my favourite book but I've never been able to convince anyone to read it because when I try to describe the plot it sounds like I'm just making shit up.

Does Bluesky constantly ask anyone else if they're writing in English? It's starting to make me feel insecure about my grasp of my first language. #isblueskygaslightingme?